


Instant Soulmate

by ninaaavan



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, College, Light Angst, M/M, Online Dating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-05
Updated: 2020-04-23
Packaged: 2020-06-09 19:45:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 56,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19482748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninaaavan/pseuds/ninaaavan
Summary: Kihyun is. . . well, he's lonely. In a moment of desperation, he pays to get fake cuffed so his family will leave him alone over break. Wonho just happens to be the oddly ideal man that the Instant Soulmate app provides for him. Dating arrangements seldom turn out as intended, but what will be, will be, right?





	1. Chapter 1

A sigh leaves Kihyun's lips, air escaping his lungs into the quiet of his apartment. It’s cold, but only just a tad bit so.

Minhyuk is out again, but then again, so are most people his age. It's a Friday night and the city is just coming alive at 10 pm. Bars, clubs, karaoke rooms, arcades-- all of them are vibrantly lit up and brought to life by the people in them. 

His apartment, however, feels dead. The air is stale despite the balcony door and windows being opened. The heat is off, so it’s cold (only a tad bit so), but he’s wrapped in a blanket with a book.

He's lonely. It's a feeling he knows well. His junior year of college has been defined by school work and a lack of friends that aren't Lee Minhyuk. 

Minhyuk, with his messy bottle blonde hair, endearing habit of blinking unevenly, and mess making custom, is his best friend.

He's grateful for Minhyuk, and their many years of friendship, but it doesn't mean he likes going out with him. In fact, he hates going out in general. First and foremost, drinking isn't his forte. It makes his anxiety worse and any night that he drinks ends with him panicking at home as he chugs water to avoid a hangover and eats candy so his metabolism works the alcohol out of his system faster. Drinking bothers him the same way run on sentences do-- just enough that he seldom partakes. And if he goes out without drinking, he doesn't have any fun. No one does. Bars are crowded and gross, full of spilled drinks and horny drunks in small spaces. 

To be honest, he doesn't see the appeal in going downtown anyways. What's the point in dressing up to pay to fuck up your liver and end your night in disappointment? He hates DD'ing or 'mom'-ing the friend group back onto the subway or into Ubers back to campus. The nights all end the same when he doesn't drink, with him making sure a group of twenty-two year olds acting like they're seven all get into their beds or are accounted for at the end of the night. Then he passes out around three and expects to be woken up to Minhyuk's call and a drunken tale of adventure or a steamy night of passion (God, please let Minhyuk learn to spare him the details).

All in all, it leads to Kihyun's reclusive nature. No more going out means no more disappointment. No babysitting grown adults.

It also means no more chances to watch dumb people do stupid things or meet new people-- not that he's that social in the first place.

But still, he's lonely and he can't help it. He has a hard time connecting to people and it seems that all of his friends are the go-out-and-party type of people. The invites are there, all he has to do is accept, but he doesn't. Hyungwon always reminded him that he was the wet blanket, always saying no to nights out, but he didn’t want to go out with his co-worker either. They weren’t all that close despite the fact that he knew pretty much everything about Hyungwon. The younger had a big mouth, metaphorically and physically. 

A breeze, cooler than he can handle, stirs the air in the room. He lazily rises to shut the door before cuddling back into his blanket on the couch.

If only there was a way to meet people without going out. 

_The internet_ , he muses. But he's not into that much either. Too many things out of his control with dating websites. No one’s who they say they are and that unnerves him.

The book doesn’t hold his interest anymore. The cold of the apartment sets in too deep. The silence stifles him and hinders his ability to concentrate.

He settles for putting his book down and getting dressed to go to his studio on campus. He makes sure to lock the house up and put the heat back on so Minhyuk won’t be cold when he gets home. 

The studio is a short walk away, and on the way he passes groups of friends stumbling and laughing on campus as they head home from an early night out. He wishes he could be like them. Numbed by alcohol and comfortable around other people to the point where he could drink with them. On the bright side, his liver is still fully functioning. Maybe he can turn his feelings into music, even if it is just a piano melody. 

.

.

.

Wonho’s apartment is chilly. He doesn’t understand why his roommates like it so cold. Jooheon, yeah, sure. Maybe he likes it cold just because-- it wasn’t _unfeasible_. Changkyun though? The kid walks around naked all the time so Wonho doesn’t know why he likes the apartment icy. It doesn’t do much but make his nips hard and then Wonho has to listen to Jooheon tease Changkyun and Changkyun flirt listlessly back. Shownu, he understands. The man is like a furnace. By his logic, he should be that way too given that they eat and work out similarly. 

But he’s not.

His roommates are weird; he loves them for it. Jooheon, with his love for kisses despite being straight and single. Shownu with his girlfriend and that funny face he makes when he’s thinking. Changkyun and his openness about sex and sexuality. Between the four of them, there’s always something going on. 

Wonho’s role in the household is to laugh at them, but he’s not around that often. Between classes, the gym, and work, he’s usually not in the apartment. 

Tonight, though, he is. Shivering on the couch despite the blanket tossed over his legs and Jooheon pressed into his side as a movie plays. Changkyun is in shorts and a t-shirt in his gaming chair, making crude comments veiled with nonchalance. 

“Can we turn the heat up?”

“You’re cold?” Jooheon asks. 

Wonho nods, “yeah.”

“It’s gonna cost us if we put it on. Want another blanket?” Changkyun offers. 

“Please.”

Wonho hadn’t realized that Changkyun was so conscious of the heating bill, but he was right. He certainly couldn’t afford an increase.

Changkyun tosses him another and Jooheon snuggles in closer to Wonho. 

If he wanted to put the heat up, he’d have to pay and he couldn’t really afford it this month. Not with Christmas coming up. He had to get his roommates something and his mom, too. 

His mother was a saint. She’d worked hard her whole life to provide for Wonho. It was almost his turn to give back to her-- he just had another year of school to get through and then the obstacle of getting a job. In the meantime, he could help by not making things worse. Asking his mom for money was his least favorite thing in the world. 

Wonho was generally a pleasant person. People liked him for his smile and cute personality, even though they were usually intimidated by his muscles when they first met him. He just hated being dependent on his mom when he was supposed to be taking care of her.

The movie plays on and the cold doesn’t bother him. The extra blanket around his shoulders and Jooheon’s koala like hold keep the chills at bay. 

Shownu enters sometime near the end of the film and causes Jooheon to jump despite the fact they weren’t watching a horror film. 

Sometimes Jooheon gets anxious and that rest of them do their best not to spook him. He scares easily.

He pulls a chair in from the kitchen to finish the movie. When it ends, they all break apart with Changkyun muttering something about a dick appointment as he slings on some weather appropriate clothing and leaves the apartment.


	2. Chapter 2

"Kihyun, you should've come out with me this weekend."

"What happened this time?" He asks Hyungwon, bored, as he wipes down the counter. 

"The funniest thing. This guy pulled his pants down and swung his dick around in the middle of the dance floor--"

"Why is that funny to you?"

"It was iconic. The confidence he exuded--"

"Hyungwon, that's not-- you know what, nevermind."

"I'm totally kidding. Security got the guy and he's banned for life from all of the bars owned by Lee Taemin. He must've been totally wasted."

"Well I'm glad you had fun?"

"My date was boring but at least I got a good story out of being at the Rainbow Room."

"You were at a bar called the Rainbow Room? That's pretty--"

"Gay? Yeah," Hyungwon snorts. "So are both of us and lots of other people in this city and on campus."

"So your date was boring," Kihyun leads. It's too quiet in the shop. The need to fill the space with sound weighs heavy on his mind. He feels like he's cleaned all the surfaces of the Espresso Lane twice. Hyungwon has the main area of the cafe spic and span, too. 

"The guy was a total square," he complains. "Wouldn't touch me and at the end of the night, didn't even want to go home together. Mind you, this was the same dude that said he'd eat me out until I cry."

"Another disappointment." Kihyun sighs conspiratorially. Hyungwon is a pretty open guy when it comes to his love life. He's handsome and genuinely a good person, so Kihyun doesn't understand why his standards for dates are so low. Maybe it's the seemingly impossibly high sex drive that Hyungwon seems to have. But he'd always chalked that up to be an exaggeration. 

Besides, he’d gotten used to it. Lee Minhyuk was the same way so between work and home, there was no break.

"Add it to my frickin' list. I need a boyfriend, a real one."

"Wouldn't that be nice," he comments unthinkingly. 

"Oh? What's this? Are you finally ready to put yourself out there? Break out of your shell?"

"No," he waves the younger off. "It's not like that. I was just being facetious."

"Facetious my ass, but okay. I won't push it today."

Kihyun breathes a sigh of relief. He's off the hook for now.

When Hyungwon decides to bring it up, though. . . that’ll be another struggle. He’ll be like a fish in a barrel, ripe for spearing (maybe that’s too violent but it goes with the fish analogy so he’ll allow it) and the judgement he receives will be like he’s fileted. And Kihyun, as smart as he is, always takes the bait. He’ll be in Hyungwon’s net before he knows it. But it’s time to kill his fishing analogy and find something else to clean in the cafe.

.

.

.

“I was gonna try a dating app, but this one is weird. People can sign up and pay you to pretend to be a fake significant other.”

“That’s weird.”

“Did you do it?” Wonho questions Jooheon. 

Shownu’s got the face again, the one where his thought is still buffering. The conversation will have moved on by the time it comes to fruition. Wonho sometimes is amazed by his impeccable grades, but everyone’s got a different brain so he can’t compare Shownu to others. 

“No. I don’t want a fake girlfriend. I want a real one. Come on, Shownu. Ask Moonbyul if any of her friends are single.”

“I told you already,” he says simply. “She said to wait until formal season and date functions start up again.”

Wonho always thought it was strange that Shownu was dating a girl in a sorority. He always assumed he’d meet a girl that injected protein powder intravenously and did P90X two times before breakfast. Moonbyul was the kind that made him take a lot of pictures and go on a lot of dates to weird places she liked, but he seemed happy. Plus, she was a generally good person. Wonho saw no red flags and thus let him be happy.

“But that’s so far away.”

“Well then go back to your dating app.”

“If you’re that lonely, I can help you get a date,” Changkyun offers. 

“I want a girlfriend, not a hookup. You’re only good at one of those things.”

“Shut up.”

Wonho stops paying attention to their bickering when his phone starts vibrating in his pants pocket. 

The display flashes “Mom” so he excuses himself to his room and answers her call. They talk about when he’s coming home and how school is going before she has to go back to work. He’s reminded that he has work soon, too. He throws on his outfit for work and a coat before bidding goodbye to Changkyun and Shownu, who are still in the living room, and leaving. 

While walking through the nippy air, he thinks about Jooheon’s dating dilemma. It makes him think about his own. He and Jooheon talk about it pretty frequently-- the withdrawal they feel, that is. 

If he’s being honest with himself, he kind of wants a significant other, but he doesn’t really have the time for one. He has to remind himself that it’s not fair to pursue someone if he really only would be able to carve a few hours out of the week for them. 

So he shelves the idea. Maybe next semester his class schedule will free up enough for him to see someone. Earning a raise was also conceivable. If he made a little more an hour he could take a shorter shift every once in a while. 

But no-- he can’t think about it now. And he shouldn’t make plans like that on contingencies and get his hopes up. 


	3. Chapter 3

The kitchen counter is filled with colorful ingredients.

"Are you excited to go home for break?" Minhyuk asks Kihyun about a week later on Sunday evening as they cook. There's still at least one week of classes to go and then a few days for exams. 

Exam season had distracted him from the fact that he even would get to go home and it hadn't even started yet. 

Kihyun shrugs as he stirs the pot on the stove. He and Minhyuk like to cook a lot when they have time. Or, rather, Minhyuk likes it when he cooks and doesn't mind helping him do the prep work which encourages Kihyun to cook more frequently. 

Regardless of their routine, he thinks about the question. He knows his mom will come pick him up and he'll be home for about a month before she brings him back. While he's there, he'll help around the house and in the family's ramen shop. Every morning he'll go to the markets with his dad and help his parents prepare ingredients while Kiwoo is at school. Then when Kiwoo is home, he'll sit in the corner of the shop on his laptop, like always, while Kihyun works his ass off. 

If he nags at Kiwoo to get off of his butt, his parents will defend Kiwoo saying that he's still in school like Kihyun isn't just because he's on break. Besides that, there's no difference in the summer when Kiwoo is on break. 

During the holiday season, his mom will drag him different places. They'll go shopping for gifts and ingredients to bake cookies. His dad will beseech him to pick out a gift for his mother. He did it every year. Knowing his dad, he’d give his mom a candle every year if Kihyun didn’t interfere. At some point he'll have to go see both sets of grandparents.

That was all well and good. He loved his family and spending time with them. 

But the questions. 

Oh God, the questions. 

He knows the drill. His mom will play coy in the car and not ask him. Once he's with both parents, and maybe even Kiwoo, they'll start asking him the dreaded questions. 

Not specifically in this order, but he knows they'll ask about his grades and his music composition. Did he win any more awards lately and miraculously forget to tell them? Had his professor recommended him for anymore internships? And then the personal questions. Does he have a girlfrie-- a significant other, his mom will correct with a coquettish smile, encouraging Kihyun to come out even though he'd never felt the desire to. They all knew he was gay already, he was pretty sure. He appreciated the acceptance, but really, couldn't his mom just chill out until he wanted to confirm it? 

Besides, he'd never even had a boyfriend or girlfriend. No guys he liked had ever been interested in him before. The ones that had asked him out were softly turned down because they weren’t his type. Kihyun knew he was a catch. He wouldn’t settle for less than what he wanted. And girls? Well, girls hadn't caught his attention in a long while. 

Maybe this year he'd tell his parents he was gay. Better yet, maybe he'd tell them he had a boyfriend and get the rest of the questions and comments about his single-hood off of his back. 

He abolishes the idea before anything else can come of it. The questions would suddenly be about his boyfriend. What his family was like, what he majored in, if he had a job, how they met, and if he was good looking. They'd never believe him anyways. He’d have to fabricate someone entirely and even then they’d suss out that he wasn’t real. It sounded like a lot of lying and trouble to go through, so he threw the idea away.

"Yeah, I guess."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing really. Just not excited to be going back to working at the shop and baking all the time. And you’ve heard my mom. Everything is always ‘Kihyunie this’ and ‘Kihyunie that’," he imitates her voice.

"Oh, yeah." Minhyuk nods, hair shifting and throat bobbing as he swallows air.

Kihyun finishes cutting some vegetables and then turns to him before starting something else.

"Are you excited?"

He watches for his answer. It's Minhyuk's turn to shrug and Kihyun understands. 

"I take it I won't see much of you during exam week," Kihyun says. He knows where he'll be. Minhyuk has a routine of drinking heavily anytime school is about to be let out. It's when all of his 'friends' on campus vie for his attention and Minhyuk doesn't know how to say 'no' to them. Mark and Jeonghan and at least half of the campus population will keep him bar hopping and busy.

Kihyun knows exactly where his own body will be. Either using the apartment living room to study or in his studio studying. He's a creature of habit and things had been the same since last year when he got his practice room after declaring his major. He and Minhyuk had lived in the dorms their first year, but it was his second year in the apartment. He looked forward to the unspoken agreement they had to live together next year as well. 

He was glad his best friend had ended up at the same university as him. 

"I'm gonna try not to go out that much."

Kihyun knows how well that will turn out. 

"Movie night this week then? I'll make cookies if you want." He gives him an out-- an excuse not to party at least one night next week. Sometimes it’s all he needs. An excuse. He can decline one night of drinking for prior plans and it’s enough for Kihyun to give him one day of respite.

"Sure. Which night do you not work?"

"Thursday." 

"Okay. I'll be here after my night class then."

"Great. Food's almost done."

"Hold still, I'll push your glasses up," Minhyuk offers and so Kihyun pauses. Long fingers gently slide his glasses back up the bridge of his nose so that Kihyun doesn’t have to stop what he’s doing, wash and wipe his hands, fix his glasses, and then start cooking again. 

Minhyuk's a great friend. He's never doubted that. 

.

.

.

“Yo! Wonho!”

Wonho stops walking on campus and turns to see Matthew. He smiles at the man and daps him up in greeting. 

“What’s up?”

“You comin’ to dollar beer night this week?”

“Nah, I’ll be at work.” It’s the truth. He will be stuck in an office, but it’s better than packing into the local bar for cheap stale beer. He wouldn’t want to go, but he’d be pressured into going. That much was sure.

“Bummer, dude. If you want to lift another day this week, hit me up. I’m trying to get on your level.”

“Definitely, dude.”

He leaves Matthew to continue on his way to class. Lifting with him wouldn’t be bad. Although he prefers lifting on his own more. It’s easier then to adjust his workout. There’s no justification required.

The building his next class is in is his favorite building. The chairs there are the comfiest on campus. He greets professors as he walks through.

He sits down in class and someone in his row asks if Wonho has a pen and paper. This classmate of his looks like she’s having a rough day so he gives her the last of his pens and several sheets of paper. She repays him with a smile.

Class passes quickly and then he finds a study room to do homework before heading to work. He likes the quiet and if he spends here, he cuts off the thirty minutes it would take to walk back to his apartment and then back this way on his way to work. The more time to work now, the more time to sleep later.

After a full shift, he hits the gym. He figures leg day is in order since he hasn’t done it since last week.

After the gym, he heads home. His muscles are tired from working out, but in a good way. He knows he’ll get a good night's sleep tonight.

At home, he finishes his homework and eats an instant meal before passing out in bed. 

There are people, throughout the day, that he speaks with about menial things. His phone only gets notifications from people sending him memes in group chats or group snaps. The only ones he really checks are from his roommates. The others he just opens, maybe leaves a like. 

He’s missing something; he doesn’t know what it is.


	4. Chapter 4

After his Monday shift, Kihyun's resolve is wearing thin. 

Couple after couple had sat in the shop and exchanged Christmas gifts, kisses, and sweet words while Hyungwon taped recycled plastic cutlery to their remaining pens in an effort to prevent theft. 

Within two weeks, he'd be subject to the questions and decided if there was ever a time to get a boyfriend, be he real or not, it was now. Cuffing season made the whole thing believable, right?

So he decides to  _ fuck it _ . He'll do it. He'll make an Instant Soulmate account even if he has to pay five dollars to sign up. 

He goes home after work and showers the scent of coffee away before getting dressed in comfy pants and a hoodie. His favorite thick socks are bunched around his ankles, comfy in both their warmth and soft fabric.

He sets up his laptop in his bed and puts on a show on Netflix for some background noise while he pulls up the app store on his cell phone and downloads Instant Soulmate. 

When he opens the app it prompts him to ask whether he wants a real person or just a fake boyfriend; he decides for the sake of time that he'll take a fake guy to pretend to be a loving boyfriend. Maybe if this whole thing works out he'll try getting an actual boyfriend. 

But he should remember not to put the cart before the horse.

There are a few men to choose from for fake boyfriends and they all have profiles like Hyungwon had showed him on their break one time. Kihyun tries to remember the way Hyungwon told him to evaluate them. 

Something about looks, then age, then the bio. 

“If you make it to bio and you’re still not sold, you’re only swiping out of pity.” Hyungwon’s eyes had just about rolled into the back of his head when he let Kihyun give it a shot on his phone.

He’s not sure he agrees with the order of importance for Hyungwon’s criteria, so he decides he’ll make his own system. He feels bad judging people off of a profile, but then again, they’ll do the same to him. Plus, he’s always been a little judgmental so indulging in it was fun. 

And was he not, in essence, paying to judge others and be judged? 

Whatever-- he’s thinking too much about it now and stalling.

After reading through the first two, he decides that grammar is very important to him. He doesn't mean like not using 'u' instead of spelling the word out, but things like verb tenses and subject verb agreement. He's not really drawn to any of the guys with brightly colored hair or piercings on their faces, even if this Mino was otherwise handsome. He recognizes Hongbin from a class he'd taken freshman year and skips him too. 

In the end, he's left with a few choices so he sends messages to three of them just to see if he can maybe pick the one he vibes best with. 

The first two fizzle out, but the third one, Wonho, seems pretty promising. When he set up his profile, it had asked him for something things he’d liked and the app suggested Wonho. While Kihyun probably would’ve elected to send him a message anyways, there was no way not to-- the app wouldn’t let him. 

The man is physically very attractive in all of his pictures with a charming smile, kind eyes, nice bone structure, pretty skin, and natural colored hair. He posts a couple of gym selfies, and while Kihyun's not much for exercising on his own, he has to admit he finds the biceps and pectorals of the man extremely hot.

So Kihyun puts most of his eggs in that basket, politely declining Gongchan and Daehyun. 

**Kihyun**

Hey! So I see you're a student at Seoul U. I am too. What do you study?

.

.

.

Wonho generally doesn't hate things, in fact there are few things he dislikes that strongly. On the top of the list, though, is asking his mom for money. 

That woman was a godsend  _ and _ an angel. She had worked hard for all of Wonho's life to give him the best after his good-for-nothing father skipped out on them. 

He'd worked jobs since he was old enough to do so, part-time of course, and did his best to maintain a high GPA so he could get scholarships. 

The one thing he wanted most in life was to be able to give back to his mom and thank her for all her sacrifices. 

With the holidays coming up, he couldn’t ask for spending money. That would be irresponsible.

But another thing he didn't like was the feeling of having double digits in his bank account. He liked to have at least one hundred saved for emergencies or unforeseen expenses. There was comfort in three figures. Four would be better, but he was in college and his expenses made it so that he never had that much.

Taking on more hours at his job wasn't a possibility right now, especially since exams were coming up. 

If only there was a way for him to earn a passive income without making a private snapchat. 

Shownu rolls out of bed and heads into their closet, stepping out a minute later with a hoodie and a jacket layered on over his t-shirt and still in his joggers. 

"Going out?" Wonho asks, setting his book down. 

He was having trouble concentrating on the reading anyways.

"Yeah. Moonbyul texted me."

Wonho nods, "have fun. Tell her and the girls I said hi."

"Will do," he salutes, exiting their room of the apartment. 

Wonho wishes he had a boyfriend. He would love it if someone called him to spend time with him. He wants someone to spoil with affection and smother in kisses and hold all of the time. It had been awhile since his last boyfriend and his phone had been dry ever since. 

Unfortunately, he didn't think he had the time to commit to another person. At least, not one that would be happy with getting texts between classes and work and almost never seeing one another. 

He shelves the thought and goes back to reading his books for class. 

. . .

"I'm telling you that Sehun used to make money off of that dating app. It's got an option to be someone's fake boyfriend over the phone so he used to do that all of the time. He said it was easy. All he had to do was text someone a few times a day, maybe send a selfie, and if the person was desperate, fake a phone call and he made like sixty bucks a month."

"Yeah, but didn't he also end up dating a guy because of it."

"I mean, yeah, but Tao wasn't on the fake dating part of the site. He was on the real site."

"So you can use both at once? It doesn't make a whole lot of sense," Changkyun questions. 

"Look, believe me or not, I don't care. I was just trying to give you an idea of how to make money since you need to replace the living room gaming chair."

"Why do I--"

"No one is gonna sit in the chair after you sat in it naked all summer, Kyun."

"It's not like it's that big of a deal. I don't get why you all are so mad."

Jooheon rolls his eyes, "you're lucky you've been my friend since you moved here."

Wonho tunes the rest of their conversation out and thinks about it. Pretending to be someone's boyfriend? That wouldn't be too bad for money. And maybe if he used the dating site while he was at it, he would find someone he was interested in. Besides, by pretending, he can practice flirting. Who knows? Even if it’s fabricated the interaction might fill the void he feels within him.

_ Alright _ , he thinks. He'll give it a shot.

Casually, he inquires what the name of the app is to Jooheon who tells him, gushing about Tao and Sehun the whole time. 

He settles down on Saturday night after work and makes an account, selecting that he'll be a fake boyfriend for someone, but also use the dating site itself. He picks his best pictures (a mix of selfies in various outfits and some gym pictures) and types in his info. 

. . .

It takes a while to get used to this dating app, but Wonho eventually feels like he’s got it figured out. He accidentally swipes on a few people he doesn’t mean to, but unmatching them isn’t a problem. He figures out that function quickly after someone sends him an unsolicited dick pic.

**Kihyun**

Hey! So I see you're a student at Seoul U. I am too. What do you study?

The person, Kihyun, types very formally. Wonho doesn’t know what to think about it the context of a dating app. Is this person going to be arrogant? Or maybe they’re just smart?

Ugh. He resents this whole internet thing sometimes. How can he read people through a screen?

**Wonho**

Oh fr? I’m a bio major! Wbu?

**Kihyun**

Music :) 

The emoji at least makes Wonho feel better. Maybe the guy just comes across kind of strict.

**Wonho**

My roommate takes a lot of music classes lol

Do you compose or sing or?

**Kihyun**

I sing and play piano, mostly. I want to get better at composing

**Wonho**

That’s awesome

I mix songs in my free time

**Kihyun**

Oh yeah? That’s cool!

**Wonho**

You’re really cute btw

**Kihyun**

Oh haha thanks. You’re handsome

**Wonho**

Can I call you Cutie? lol

**Kihyun**

I guess so haha

No one would ever believe I let someone call me pet names lmao

**Wonho**

But you’re so small and cute?

  
  


Conversation flows from there.


	5. Chapter 5

Kihyun caroms around the room, tidying things to calm his nerves. He's never used a dating service before. He'd heard the horror stories Hyungwon told him about grabby hands on dates and straight forward messages that Kihyun considered sexting more than anything else, but alas, they didn't meet Hyungwon's definition of the word. 

_ All talk and no bite _ Hyungwon had told him.  _ Not one of them is looking for anything more than two minutes of disappointment. _

So he hadn't chosen Seoul Mate or Hook Up Now or whatever other dating site existed. He'd chosen Instant Soulmate which, from what he understood, was a dating site that you could pay to be matched with someone to act like a significant other.  _ So basically like a sugar baby in reverse but less expensive and less sex driven _ , he thinks. 

He'd paid his five bucks, small price to pay for peace of mind over break. With the app he could screenshot his conversations to show his parents. And again, worst come to worst, he could pay the additional fee to have the guy call him and pretend to be his loyal boyfriend. That would work, right?

The man he'd picked had a pleasant face. Nice straight teeth, cute eyes, pretty-- like, really pretty-- lips, and nice arms.  _ Wonho _ . 

Kihyun hadn't really known what to send, so he just said hi and introduced himself.

He really hoped this Wonho wasn't a total dick. He just needed this app to work for the next three and a half weeks. He didn't mind paying the ten dollar fee for the monthly subscription.

When his phone dinged about ten minutes later, he prayed it was from the app and not one of his co-workers offering a shift or a friend wanting something stupid. 

Luckily, the grey heart notification popped up. 

For a while he keeps up a conversation with Wonho. He’s surprised that they’ve never met before given that they both seem to run in the same circles more or less. Then again, Kihyun does prefer the comfort of his home or studio. 

And besides that, Wonho works a lot from what he can tell. 

It’s nice. He doesn’t have to be on his phone 24/7 and his grades don’t suffer in the last week or so of class. 

All of his fears of this guy being a douchebag disappear, too. Wonho is so kind-hearted and soft, despite his muscles and strong appearance. 

**Wonho**

Cutieeee

Tell me what I should eat for dinner

**Kihyun**

Haha okay. Give me some options

**Wonho**

Ramen or frozen chicken and rice?

**Kihyun**

Chicken and rice 

You eat instant ramen too much :( 

**Wonho**

I can’t cook and my roommates barely cook either

Kihyun really wants to invite him over for dinner or make him something and drop it off.

**Wonho**

Be my private chef pls

He laughs at his phone.

**Kihyun**

Behave and maybe one day I’ll cook for you lol

**Wonho**

Wym behave? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

**Kihyun**

I mean do your homework

God, could he be any more of a narc? Why did he panic and say that? Or the other that?

**Wonho**

Ok Ki whatever u say ;)

**Kihyun**

So, are you eating now? 

**Wonho**

It’s in the microwave

Getting hot

Like you make me ;)

God that was awful.

But, wait a minute, why are his cheeks getting hot? Why is he smiling? Over three texts from a boy that he’s paying to be nice to him?

Make it make sense.

**Kihyun**

Wonho

**Wonho**

Kihyun

**Kihyun**

Is it weird if I make you a lunch box?

For the thirty seconds or so that it takes for Kihyun to get a response, he beats himself up. Why the heck did he say that? Wonho’s totally going to think he’s weird. He’s a stranger. He can’t just give him food. 

**Wonho**

I would love that

We could eat together?

Kihyun thinks that that would actually be nice. His inhibitions about meeting this internet stranger dissipated quickly. 

**Kihyun**

How about Thursday? I have no exam to cram for that day 

**Wonho**

I can’t :( Can you squeeze me in Wednesday?

**Kihyun**

No :( But I’ll still make you a lunch box. I can just leave it somewhere for you.

**Wonho**

You don’t have to

**Kihyun**

And if I coincidentally make too much food?

You want me to waste it?

Kihyun knows what he’s doing. If Wonho were there in person, Kihyun would have him eating out of the palm of his hand through his tone and the look in his eyes he’s perfected. 

**Wonho**

Don’t waste food

Kihyun chuckles as it plays out. It’s exactly what he predicted.

**Wonho**

I’ll take it

You can tell me where to meet you for it

“Who are you texting?”

“Hmm?” Kihyun hums as he glances up from his phone. He was typing a response to Wonho when Minhyuk questioned him.

“Who is that?”

“No one.”

“You’re on your phone a lot.”

“I’m writing a song.”

Minhyuk doesn’t believe him and Kihyun knows it. He never writes a song with his phone. He’s a paper and pencil kind of guy. And he loves working in his studio. The apartment isn’t a place for that kind of work.

“You’re a fucking liar, Ki. Spit it out. Who is it?”

“Fine,” Kihyun sighs. He doesn’t know why he bothers to lie to Minhyuk anyways. The guy can see through him. “It’s a guy. . .”

“A sugar daddy?”

“No!” Kihyun denies. “Why is that the first place your mind went to?”

“Because you have your scheming smile on. And you hate people our age.”

“That’s. . . not completely true. But anyways, everything’s still new so don’t worry about it.”

“Of course I have to worry about it, Kiki. You’re my little sugar plum kiwi baby honey child.”

“I’m your what?”

“Yeah, I don’t know either.”

.

.

.

Wonho wakes up late. Or, later than normal, rather. 

He scrambles to check his phone. 

**Kihyun**

Good morning

Are you awake?

I take it you’re still sleeping so I left the lunch I made you with a professor Chwe

Hope you like it :)

Wonho checks the time stamps and finds that the messages all come within the span of twenty minutes. 

**Wonho**

Good morning Cutie

Thanks for the lunch

Sorry I woke up late :(

**Kihyun**

All good :)

Hope you enjoy it

I gotta get back to studying so I’ll text you later.

**Wonho**

Study well

The one chance Wonho has to meet with Kihyun before break and he blew it. He beats himself up as he eats fried eggs and gets dressed to go take his exam. He leaves early so that he can find professor Chwe and get his lunch. 

“The young man that left this for you is a real cutie. Is he your boyfriend?” She pries. 

Professor Chwe was a young woman whom Wonho held in high regards. She was smart, but still approachable. Over his three plus years at the school he’d come to consider her a close friend as far as professors went. 

“Not yet,” Wonho answers. Kihyun wasn’t one of the people that paid him to be a fake boyfriend. 

And if he was being honest, Kihyun was someone he could see himself dating. He hadn’t thought the app would be any good. 

The first few people he matched with on Instant Soulmate were weird. 

“He must like you,” she smiles sagely. Wonho wonders where she draws her wisdom from considering she spends most of her time researching and doing experiences.

“You think so?”

“I’ve never had a student drop off home made lunch for another student.”

“He’s pretty sweet. I didn’t think he’d actually do it.”

“Well, he did. Now, be sure to thank him. Take it and get out of here, I have a class to teach in five minutes and I’m not ready.”

Wonho accepts the box and leaves her office.

Classes start in a few minutes so he heads to his and sits down near one of the windows. A classmate greets him but he doesn’t carry on a conversation with them like he normally would.

Instead he looks to see what is in the box. He lifts the lid and is blessed with fresh, home cooked food. The vegetables look perfectly steamed and the meat smells perfectly seasoned. The noodles in the box shine with sauce and he sees egg mixed into them. There’s plenty of protein and he’s grateful. Kihyun must be really smart. Protein is key for muscle building.

The professor breezes in and he puts the lid back on, seals it tight and shuts it into his bag.

**Wonho**

Got the lunch box

It looks delicious. I can’t wait to eat it

Thanks a million Cutie

Wonho wishes class would go by faster so that he could eat it now. And text Kihyun. Maybe if they get out early he can still meet up with him?

He's just really, really curious as to how to guy is in real life. Seriously, what kind of person makes a lunch box for someone they don't know? Kihyun definitely was a sweetheart and Wonho could tell he cared for others. 

He was probably the type to volunteer and smile at others on the street. Well, maybe that was too much. Kihyun did seem to be kind of judgmental in some of his texts.

This kind of thinking was exactly the reason that Wonho wants to meet Kihyun in real life. He wants all the answers.

Even if Kihyun doesn't want to date him, maybe they can be friends.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The very real possibility of Wonho catfishing comes to him so Kihyun asks for proof.

he Espresso Lane is quiet today. All of the chestnut brown wooden surfaces shine as if Kihyun has just polished them with Lemon Pledge. 

He has. 

Out of boredom, he’s started deep cleaning the cafe while Hyungwon serves the occasional customer and stacks the tea cups too high for him to reach. They’re reserve cups anyway. Seldom do they get used, but frequently they do get cleaned.

It’s his last shift before going home for break and Hyungwon, when they did talk, would tell him about finals and his friends.

“Oh, did I tell you I went on another date?” He mentions casually when Kihyun goes back to the counter to switch out cleaning supplies and start on the floors.

The cafe is barren at present, just like the trees outside.

“Did you?” He hums, knowing what follows will likely be a wild story.

The industrial sink lets out a rush of water at his command as he fills a mop bucket. He had swept earlier, but now it was an appropriate time to mop. Hyungwon waits until Kihyun will be able to hear him. 

“The dude was a total catfish. I had to crawl out of the bathroom window.”

“Catfish? Like that TV show?”

“‘He never should’ve called me a fatass Kelly Price’,” Hyungwon nods solemnly as he quotes the show. 

“Big yikes.”

He wheels the yellow mop bucket out to the main area of the cafe and starts on the hardwood floors. 

“You’re talking like an actual young person.” Hyungwon fake shudders when Kihyun turns to glare at him.

Maybe he had picked up some things from Wonho. He was also pretty sure he’d heard Minhyuk say something like that once before, but he barely remembered. 

“Anyways, come look at the pictures. I screenshotted his profile.”

Kihyun mops over to the counter area and looks at the picture. 

The photographs promise a decently attractive young man and the bio indicates that he’s tall. Kihyun supposes that’s good for Hyungwon seeing as he’s rather lanky himself. 

“So what did he look like?”

“I didn’t get a picture of him because I’m not a creep, but he definitely lied about his height and looked like he hadn’t showered in a while.”

“Gross. Do you think he used to look like the pictures?” Kihyun asks, still trying to picture what this guy really looked like.

“No way. Maybe if he had a hot older brother that practiced good hygiene.”

“Fair enough.”

Hyungwon then launches into the story of his daring escape and reporting and blocking the stranger on his hook up app.

. . .

Kihyun stares at the two pictures of Wonho and wonders if the man is real. He seems like the perfect match for Kihyun and it's all too good to be true. For all he knows, Wonho could be catfishing him. It didn't seem like it, but it was possible after all. 

Wonho was his ideal type personified and it didn’t seem real to Kihyun.

The thoughts had been plaguing him ever since Hyungwon told him his story. 

His standards weren’t that high when it came to physical appearances, so honestly, Wonho didn’t have to look as good as he did in the pictures. Kihyun could forgive him if he’d slacked off at the gym or let his hair grow out some. The problems would arise if he was a liar in total.

Realistically, it didn’t matter since this was all fake anyways. If he could make his parents believe that the modelesque man was his boyfriend, that was all that mattered.

**Kihyun**

Hey 

He starts the conversation. Usually they start talking in the late morning, but because he’d had a final bright and early, he decided to study first and see if Wonho texted him. Kihyun remembers Wonho doesn’t have an exam today and wonders what he’s up to, but doesn’t want to be too nosy. They just met after all. Oh, and Kihyun was paying for attention. Theoretically he didn’t need to talk to him now, but he convinced himself that he was chatting so that he knew more about Wonho and could better convince his parents. 

When Wonho responds, they start talking like normal until Kihyun does it. After waiting a whole day after his shift and then talking normally for a bit, he pulls the trigger. 

**Kihyun**

Can you send me a selca or something? 

No offense but I want to make sure you’re real lol

**Wonho**

Yeah! I can’t believe I hadn’t sent one already

When the image pops up on Kihyun’s screen he has a momentary panic before wanting to melt at how handsome Wonho is. His smile is just so sweet that Kihyun wants to squeal. 

He calms himself down, reminding himself  _ you’ve never even met this person or seen him in real life. Get a hold of yourself _ . 

**Wonho**

Can I get one back?

Kihyun purses his lips as he scrolls through his gallery looking for a good one. His lips don’t look good in half of them and in the other half his forehead looks huge. Finally he just picks one and hits send because why should he care what the guy he’s paying to fake being his boyfriend think about his looks?

Coincidentally he sends one of his best selfies to date. By pure chance, of course. It’s not like he really cares what the internet stranger thinks of him. That would be preposterous. 

**Wonho**

You are such a cutie, wow

Seriously how are you so cute?

**Kihyun**

Thanks

You’re super handsome

I kinda thought you were a catfish lol

**Wonho**

You’re too pretty to be real

Kihyun finds himself. . . blushing? at the texts he receives. It’s unlike him. 

**.**

**.**

**.**

**Shownu**

I found my first gray hair today

I put it on your dresser

**Wonho**

Thank you

That was v thoughtful of you

Wonho blinks at his phone and questions the interactions he has with his friends on a daily basis. 

He’s hurrying on his way to work when he sees someone that looks familiar heading the opposite direction with headphones in. The other problem is that they’re on the sidewalk that runs parallel to the one he walks.

He shoves his phone in his pocket and ignores the possibility that it was Kihyun.

**Wonho**

I think I saw u on campus today

Wonho types out, recalling the shorter, cute guy he had seen on campus that day with medium brown hair. 

**Kihyun**

Really? Where? 

**Wonho**

Outside of the music building

I was on the other side of the quad and you looked in a hurry :(

**Kihyun**

It's possible it was me, but no worries! lol

We'll probably run into one another again 

Wonho finds himself liking that idea, despite feeling a little tug at his heart. This whole relationship (if he could call it that) was built over the internet. What if he never met Kihyun? They were both busy. If he didn’t put any effort into this then he was sure to be forgotten about.

It wasn't like any of his other experiences with dating apps had panned out. At best he'd talked to a guy for a month before the guy got bored or the guy found another person he liked better.

But for now, what was the harm? 

It wasn't like he was catching feelings. Definitely not. Catching feelings was scary. He wouldn’t let himself do it. There was no way he'd ever have the time to cuddle the younger guy like he wanted to, or take him on dates, or shower him with affection, so Wonho wouldn't even let himself think of it.

Especially not when they were both about to leave to different places. Their budding relationship wouldn’t last-- or at least that’s what he tells himself when he starts to feel giddy over the fact that Kihyun made him a lunchbox and talks to him frequently.

There were many instances in which Kihyun didn’t text him. But Wonho was fine with that.

He had things to do and so did Kihyun.

While he liked that both of them led their own lives, he missed the security of the way his old relationships were. He liked seeing the people he knew in class, at the gym, and at work. It would be nice to date someone who was familiar with the institutions of his life.

But maybe his routine was also like a trap. He’d been in his routine for the past few years and this year had yet to bring him the same feeling of fulfillment. Why that was was beyond him.

The longing in his chest for something different could, potentially, be something Kihyun could help him with. There was a possibility that Kihyun could take him to new places and teach him new things. Some spices for the recipe for life. Kihyun could be that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is the spacing for the text messages okay? It looks good on my computer, but I'm not sure I like how it looks on the phone. Let me know if you think I should add more paragraph breaks please.


	7. Chapter 7

Tomorrow’s the day. His mom will pick him up in the morning. He’d spent a fair amount of time organizing his room and packing things to take home. 

Kihyun sends Wonho a message as he's curled up in bed. His laptop is on and a drama plays through a streaming service. He likes the background noise of it. His apartment is too quiet lately since Minhyuk is always out studying or saying good bye to his other friends. He’s been drinking a lot and Kihyun is kind of worried, but Minhyuk knows how to handle himself. His friends, despite not being his own cup of tea, weren’t terrible and definitely took care of him. 

**Minhyukie**

Not comng home, byee

**Kihyun**

Be safe and call me if you need me

He reads and responds to Minhyuk, then increases his phone’s volume.

A sigh leaves his lips. More alone time. Despite being an introvert, he was tired of sitting by himself all the time. Maybe he should try to make more friends. Hyungwon had offered to take him out with his friends, but he’d always declined. His friends seemed wild and Kihyun didn’t like wild people. He much preferred calm. Minhyuk was enough crazy for him. 

What was the harm in his friend drinking four nights a week? Besides the obvious detriment to his liver. Kihyun had edged around the subject before but was met with defensiveness from Minhyuk.. 

“I’m not drinking to cope,” he had said then. “I’m only drinking because my friends keep inviting me out and I don’t like to be the only one sober at the bars.”

It sounded like coping to Kihyun, but as long as he wasn’t doing it to forget about problems in his life, it seemed to be fine for now. 

The last thing he wanted to do was alienate his best friend and push him to the people that drove him to drink. 

Wonho doesn't answer him, though, so eventually he falls asleep. He hopes the lack of response is some kind of fluke and that the other hasn't forgotten him. Maybe he has a weird schedule?

He really needs this scheme to work. Plus, the attention is great. Kihyun feels validated for something other than singing for the first time in a long time. Or, validated by someone other than Minhyuk and maybe his mom. 

He’s a mess.

Whatever it is, he has to be up tomorrow when his mom gets to campus.

.

.

.

**Wonho**

Sorry, I was at work. Don't expect you to be up anymore so

good morning cutie :) 

Wonho types the messages and hits send as he walks from work to the gym. 

It's already way past midnight, but his first exam isn't until 2 tomorrow and he doesn't have much studying to do so he thinks a good workout, a shower, and then bed sounds like a good plan.

Maybe he’ll cook something when he gets home-- if not, then he’ll probably just eat leftovers.

Shownu is probably dead asleep in his room by now, so Wonho will be confined to the living room until he’s ready for bed. 

Changkyun might be up still. Hopefully if he’s playing games he’s clothed, especially since it’s winter.

He texts him and sees that the texts he sent Kihyun read ‘read’, but no reply comes. It’s late, so he doesn’t let it bother him. 

He texts Changkyun who responds that he won’t be home later and rolls his eyes. Changkyun is. . . something else. At least he won’t get flashed. 

. . .

When he wakes up the next morning, he sees that Kihyun has returned a good morning text.

**Wonho**

You read my messages last night, were u still up? 

Wonho types, eyes bleary still as he eats some cereal. If he remembers correctly, today is the day that Kihyun is going home. 

**Kihyun**

My roommate was out last night, so I checked to make sure it wasn't him dying, but I fell back asleep

**Wonho**

Ah, I was wondering about that.

I was worried I woke you up

**Kihyun**

No hahah

**Wonho**

Ur going home today?

**Kihyun**

Yeah

I’m actually almost home

My mom picked me up

**Wonho**

It’s so early

But that’s nice

Wish we could’ve met up

**Kihyun**

Me too :(

I’m kinda sad to leave school

**Wonho**

Me too, but it’s only for a little while so i’m not too pressed

We’ll have to get together when we get back

Wonho responds to Kihyun’s message as he packs his bag to go home. He doesn’t have a lot to bring, just some laundry and his laptop.

Why did he say that? Didn’t he just fight with himself about how he doesn’t want to catch feelings if he hasn’t met Kihyun?

But the more he thinks about Kihyun and the more they speak to one another via text, the more he likes the idea.

Also, he really should be studying for his exam, but at this point, he’s not going to learn anything. 

**Kihyun**

I’d like that, actually

My mom keeps asking me who I’m texting lol

**Wonho**

Well are you gonna tell her? Lol

**Kihyun**

I’ll tell my whole family at once so that I don’t have to re-explain

Wonho thinks that’s a little intense considering they met online like a week and a half ago, but then again, the rest of their experience has been so natural. Maybe it wasn’t actually intense just because it was the first thing that felt... un-normal. 

They end the conversation when Wonho apologizes, citing his need to study.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of a filler/kind of don't like this chapter, but it had to be done


	8. Chapter 8

Kihyun wakes up bright and early the next morning. He checks his phone and finds no word from Minhyuk and there’s no sign of him in the apartment. It should be fine, though. It’s not like it’s abnormal. 

He wishes Wonho a good morning as well before moving out of bed to strip the sheets and assemble them with his stuff to take home. 

The fridge is empty so he finds a granola bar to eat because he’s hungry and his mom isn’t here yet. She normally picks him up early and brings some fruit for him to snack on, but she must be caught in traffic or something. 

When she does arrive, she wraps him in a big hug. She looks the same as always, pretty, but an awful lot like him. She insists on taking two of his bags and Kihyun pulls his suitcase and backpack to successfully transport everything in one trip. 

On the way home, she tells him all about their holiday plans-- which church events they’re attending, the neighborhood party, cookie baking she wants help with before an exchange, and visits to family members. He manages to keep her distracted the whole way home and avoid the interrogation.

They head straight to the restaurant to prepare before dinner rush.

His dad gives him a hug when he gets into the shop and then they all three wash their hands and get to work. 

Kihyun’s brother, Kiwoo, sits at one of the tables in the back, doing something on his computer as Kihyun and his mother clean. His father preps food and eventually calls his wife for help. 

“So how’s school?” They ask. 

_ Starting already? Well, they did last almost an hour _ . He wishes they could have waited a little longer, but that would be asking for too much. 

“It’s going well. I passed all my classes this semester. I have the second half of my music theory class next semester, so it’ll be hard, but I really like the professor.”

As Kihyun talks, he answers questions from his parents. He catches sight of Kiwoo rolling his eyes a few times, but lets it slide. He’s always been jealous of the attention Kihyun received. It wasn’t his fault, though. Kihyun couldn't help his Type A personality that made him excel at everything the same way Kiwoo couldn't help his Type B personality that drew people to him. They were opposites. Kihyun didn't have a lot of friends, but his parents showered him in praise for his academics. Kiwoo had a ton of friends but his grades weren't stellar.

“What about. . . Do you have someone special?”

There it is. The question of the month.

“He’s been texting someone all morning!”

“Mom!” He whines in protest. He can’t believe she just exposed him like that-- well, actually, he can.

He sits at the counter, finished with wiping down the bar and the tables.

It’s now or never. 

He’s got to convince them that his fake boyfriend/thing (Wonho) is his real significant other. 

“I have a. . . well, he’s not my boyfriend officially. We just talk a lot.”

“Really?” His mom squeals and launches herself into a hug. Kihyun struggles to catch her despite how much smaller she is. 

“Tell us about him, Kihyunie,” his father says softly as he cooks. 

He pauses. What is right to say? If he says too much, he could give it away. If he doesn’t say enough, they won’t believe him. 

“His name is Wonho. He’s in the same year as me and studies science. He wants to be a physical therapist after school, but he likes music and works on it as a hobby.”

“You sound like you memorized a script,” his dad chuckles. 

Luckily, his mom’s excitement takes the heat off of him.

“What does he look like? Show me a picture,” his mom demands, sitting next to him. 

“He’s really handsome,” Kihyun can feel himself blush and it doesn’t go unnoticed by either of his parents. He pulls up a picture of Wonho to show his mom, having saved it to his phone. 

She gasps, “Kihyunie he is gorgeous!”

No one fires off a question as his mom grabs his phone to show his dad. His brother types awat on his computer in the corner. 

Once they’ve gushed over the picture enough, he knows the dam will be broken and the questions will flow like water.

“There’s no way that’s your boyfriend,” his brother chimes, suddenly looking up from where he had been tucked away. Kihyun had almost forgotten he was even present. 

“Not yet,” he says. 

“Show us a picture of you together.”

“I don’t have one,” he gulps. His mother turns critical too, eyeing him warily. “I didn’t think to take one. I’ve only met up with him, like, twice.”

“But you’ve been talking for a month?” Why did he lie? Now it seemed ridiculous not to have met and taken a picture together in a month of talking. Damn. He had thought he'd made the right choice since talking only for one week and a half was suspiciously right before break. 

"More like--" he protests, trying to correct to the truth. Two weeks would be a lot more believable. 

Unfortunately their ears are closed to his words.

“He seems a little too good to be true. You didn’t make him up, did you?” His dad asks, not even looking at him. 

“You’re not following him on Instagram,” his brother throws across the room. He wonders how fast his brother had moved his fingers to look that up in such a short time span. He was probably on the website while everyone else worked. Slacker.

“He’s real,” Kihyun pouts. “Besides, I barely even use Instagram, why is that your metric?”

“I'll check your Twitter then, too.” Kihyun rolls his eyes at Kiwoo and ignores him. He can always say Wonho doesn't have a Twitter. It is the least common of social media he has and employs.

“How did you meet?”

_ A dating app _ Kihyun thinks. His parents would never approve of that and his brother would tell him Wonho was nothing more than a catfish

Luckily, he’d expected this question and was ready to answer it. 

“He came to the showcase to watch one of his friends perform. After that he came up to me and we just started talking.”

“Fat chance, Kihyun. You never talk to strangers.”

“Well, Kiwoo, if the stranger is that cute, even Kihyunie might.”

His family roasts him in the background, but his mind shuts out their words. Although it’s just meant to be teasing, their lack of confidence in him causes his mind to spiral. He shows them parts of their conversations and they still don’t believe him.

The desire to slam his head into the dark wood of the countertop boils in his mind until he does.

Why had he even bothered?

.

.

.

At what Wonho considers to be an early hour, he wakes up and finishes the food in the apartment. There’s not a lot left since he’s the last person to leave for the semester, but it makes an alright meal. He really isn’t one to complain anyways. 

He fries the egg, eats the last piece of bread after toasting it, and cuts up the tomato and celery to eat. 

**Wonho**

Good morning to you too Cutie

Did ur mom come get u yet

He types out with one hand as he walks to his professor’s office to drop off his last term paper. He’d finished proof-reading it last night despite the fact that it had been done the day before. Originally, he’d planned to stay one more day, but Jooheon had left early and his mom called to say she missed him. So now he had a train to catch. 

**Kihyun**

Yes, we’re in the car still

**Wonho**

Nice

I just turned in my last paper

Now I gotta pack

**Kihyun**

You procrastinated this long?

**Wonho**

Dont judge me

I had a paper to finish for orgo

**Kihyun**

No judgement here

Isn't Orgo Organic Chemistry?

I heard that's super hard

The two continue to text about how finals went as Wonho throws his clothes into a suitcase and loads his laptop and protein supplements into his backpack. 

Seoul’s station is too far to walk with the luggage so he takes a tram to the main station. 

Swiping his student card, he gets to his platform on time despite the holiday travel rush. It was probably not a good idea to take a train this close to rush hour’s peak, but he manages. 

Kihyun hasn’t been responding as frequently, probably getting home and catching up with his family. Or maybe unpacking because he seems the type to do that as soon as he gets somewhere. 

Since he has the time, Wonho looks at his bank account and sees five bucks deposited in his account from Instant Soulmate. He doesn’t remember being anyone’s fake boyfriend-- or at least not for any significant amount of time. 

There was that one dude that one day that asked him out. He’d talked to him for a few hours before the other gave up. If that was five buckaroos worth of work, he could keep this business up.

With a shrug he moves on and forgets about it. It’s just a measly little amount anyways.

**Kihyun**

My parents don't believe you’re real

Told you they think I'm a total loser

comes a text from Kihyun. It’s kind of weird because he can’t imagine why someone’s parents would think that he wasn’t real. It wasn’t like they were dating or anything, so why was Kihyun even telling his parents? Well, maybe they were just really close? He doesn't know. He shouldn't freak out or anything.

And why wouldn’t they believe him? Unless he really was a total loser.

But he didn’t believe that. He’d enjoyed talking to the younger over the past week. And Professor Chwe hadn’t said anything other than how cute he seemed. She was a pretty good judge of character.

He shouldn’t worry.

**Wonho**

Aww, cutie, as long as you know I am then who cares what they say

**Kihyun**

I guess you're right 

**Wonho**

I always am 

Now, tell me what it's like being home

Wonho wonders what life is like for Kihyun. 

Are his parents together? Do they live in a house or an apartment? Do they celebrate with a Christmas tree and a traditional dinner? Or is he not Christian? Is he going out with friends while he’s there or is he the quiet type that likes to stay home? There's so much he doesn't know about Kihyun but he finds himself wanting to know.

**Kihyun**

Pretty boring. I’ve been working at the shop or doing Christmas stuff ever since I got home.

**Wonho**

Christmas stuff? Haha but I’ve been working too

**Kihyun**

Baking cookies and wrapping gifts kind of stuff. But where do you work?

**Wonho**

Domestic ;-) and just at the clothing store I used to work at in high school. They hired me back for the holidays

Wonho considers asking to trade Snapchats or Instagrams so that he can watch Kihyun’s stories, imagining his cutie in an apron, flour on his face. Or in a t-shirt and apron printed with his parent’s ramen shop’s name. He’d look so cute no matter what.

**Kihyun**

That’s nice. I never asked where you were from?

**Wonho**

Anyang you?

**Kihyun**

Goyang haha

The train pulls into the station and he disembarks, quickly making his way to the rear entrance of the building. He knows this station like the back of his hand. 

Taxis stand at the ready, but his walk is short. His mom’s apartment is only a few blocks from the station. Despite how some people can’t stand it, he finds the sound of trains passing by at all hours of the night relaxing. It’s a homey feeling.

**Wonho**

Oh, so you live close to the school too

Just in opposite directions lol 

But you said you;ve been working?

He unlocks the white door of the apartment and steps in, dropping his bags by the door so that he can properly greet his mom. 

She flings herself at him and pets his head. In expectation of this interaction, he crouches so that she can reach comfortably despite their lack of height difference. His mom is on the tall end of average height for a woman.

“Welcome home, Sweetie. How was the train ride? Dinner will be ready in a few minutes.”

“The train was fine. There weren’t any delays.”

“Good, good. I was worried today because the weather forecast wasn’t good. But, go put your stuff away and then come into the kitchen with me.”

He listens well, diligently depositing his things into his room and taking his phone charger into the kitchen with him.

**Kihyun**

Oh yeah

Just at my parent’s ramen shop though

**Wonho**

Sounds like heaven 

“Is that your group text?” his mom asks as she makes kimchi. 

Wonho puts his phone down to help her, reaching for a pair of rubber gloves. 

“No, it’s a guy I’ve been talking to.”

“Oh, okay. Just talking?”

“We kind of just met?”

“Oh, well,” she doesn’t say anything else and Wonho feels the need to explain when he looks at her face. 

“I met him online, so we haven’t met up yet or anything. But I like him and I know he’s who he says he is.”

“What’s he like?”

“Mom, he’s the cutest thing. His little nose and his face in general are just so pretty.”

His mom smiles softly as she mixes the cabbage with the seasonings. Wonho gushes about how cool it is that he likes music and is so talented that he can play more than one instrument. 

“Seems like you really care for him. I hope it works out for you.”

Wonho’s smile falters when he remembers that they’re never actually met, but then he remembers it won’t be a problem. Kihyun’s not a desperate loser, so that’s not why he's using a dating service. Besides, wasn’t the goal of having Instant Soulmate to date someone? So yeah, he probably wanted the same thing as Wonho. Well-- if he could decide that was something he wanted. 

He thought he didn’t have time, but it was surprisingly easy to talk to Kihyun for hours. And he didn’t seem to be too high maintenance-- he was too focused on his own life. That left plenty of time for Wonho to take care of the things he needed to do. 

Maybe he could make it work. . . if it ever came to that point. It seemed so far in the future, maybe he should just let whatever happens happen.

He'd been contemplating it for a while. What he would do if they were still talking a few weeks from now when it was time to go back to school, that is. It seems that the universe is in his favor lately, so he’d probably ask Kihyun out.

“Thanks, mom.”

It feels good to be home.


	9. Chapter 9

Kihyun is covered in flour and sugar and butter and all the ingredients that are needed to bake cookies. Or, at least, his apron is. He had been smart to put one on today. His clothing was only saved by the fabric his mother had insisted on him wearing. 

The treats will sell nicely in the store and make good gifts for the neighbors. Kiwoo packages them up for people and writes holiday notes in his neat handwriting. 

Kihyun's mom hums jovially while Kihyun stresses over the fact that she's making a huge mess and the cookies aren't going to turn out right because she’s adding too much-- flour. He cringes as more than a cup goes into the mix. It’s not the end of the world, he realizes, but he’s something of a perfectionist. 

Things had been great since he got home. Aside from his parents not being sold on the idea that he had a significant other (one he wasn't ready to label yet, he'd elaborated later), being home was just what he needed. 

The change in scenery from Seoul to Goyang-si had refreshed his mind and gotten his creative juices flowing once more. While he hadn't been writing a lot of lyrics lately, he had been composing more. The keyboard he stored under his bed was seeing more action in the past week than it had in the past three years probably. 

Wonho texts frequently and sometimes Kihyun thinks he's created a line or two of a song that he likes. So far, he isn't able to put them into one song, though. It's fine. He's only experiencing writer's block. If he waits long enough it'll go away on its own, right?

He really hopes so. He can't take much more of the sitting and staring at a blank piece of paper waiting for words to come. 

“What’s got you so in your head?” Kihyun’s mom taps his temple and he just knows that refined flour is on his skin now. Wiping at it won’t get it all off so he lets it stay, especially since she’ll probably poke and prod him some more. 

“Just trying to come up with a song.”

“You’re stuck?” Kiwoo asks, glancing up from the card he’s writing.

Oh God, he hopes Kiwoo doesn’t start teasing him. It’s not like the brat could write music, but he sure loved to run his little rat mouth when his “supreme overlord older brother, his highness Kihyun” struggled to do something. It was part of their push and pull. Kihyun understood that. 

“Yeah.”

“Well don’t force it.”

Oh. Maybe his brother is finally growing up. 

“Woo is right. It’ll come to you. If you force something instead of letting it develop naturally, nothing good will come of it.”

Is it just him, or does she sound like she’s not talking about song-writing anymore?

. . .

"Excuse me," Kihyun announces quietly as he steps out of the family room and into the hallway of his grandparent’s house. 

The name on the phone is most welcomed. 

Well, anything to get him out of the flame and back into the frying pan is welcomed. His parents had dragged him to his grandparent’s house and they were absolutely railing Kihyun with questions. 

Kiwoo was left unscathed, saved from questions of scholarship and relationships. 

While he was jealous, he also felt bad. Maybe that was the cause of some strain in their relationship-- the fact that his parents and grandparents gave him all of the attention. That was the pull. 

They were both complicit in it. 

Kihyun’s unwillingness to sacrifice Kiwoo to the spotlight was the push. The unbelievable amount of pressure Kihyun felt was something he would shoulder forever if it meant his brother got to be free.

"Hey Minhyuk."

"Ki! Settle something for me?"

"What?"

"We're playing a game and we need to know if the first president of the United States was George Washington or Abraham Lincoln."

"Why didn't you ask Google?"

"It's a phone a friend, now answer! Please!"

"George Washington. The other one was the liberator of the slaves. What game are you even playing?"

"Lee family trivia. Anyways, I gotta go."

"Yeah, okay, bye."

Kihyun hangs up the phone and looks at the blinking end call time on the screen. What a strange person his best friend is. 

He treks back into the family room where his family is and his mom looks at him with her eyes hopeful. Kiwoo sends him a sly look like he knows Minhyuk just called him for some bullshit reason. 

Maybe it was, but he would prefer Minhyuk's calls over more nosy questions. 

"Who was that?"

"Just Minhyuk." He takes his seat once again. He leans over and lowers his voice to talk to Kiwoo as the elders move on in their discussion to something his bum uncle has done. "Why does grandpa look ready to drop dead?"

"I think grandma put rat poison in his cup."

The two snicker even though they both dearly love their grandparents. It's hard not to make jokes when their grandfather looks like he'll fall out of his chair and go to sleep on the floor any second now. It's obvious he'd been drinking before they arrived. 

The family gathering drags on through dinner and Kihyun's fingers itch to text Wonho. 

He knows the older is working right now and he knows that he's supposed to be spending quality time with his family, but it isn't fun. 

He'd been volunteered to decorate the house which was his least favorite thing to do. He likes clean and orderly, not cluttered and glittery. He'd much rather help cook or drag boxes upstairs instead of setting trinkets out and arranging them. 

Kiwoo gets sacrificed to making trips to the communal storage area of the apartment complex where his grandparents live. He offers to trade jobs with Kiwoo, but his younger brother declines. He knows he has the better job because he can take forever walking back and forth and no one can say anything to him.

After a while of trying to hold out and not text Wonho, he caves. The distraction will be nice-- if Wonho responds, that is. He's going to risk it. 

**Kihyun**

Hey

**Wonho**

Hi Cutie

**Kihyun**

You at work?

**Wonho**

Yeah

It's suuuuper dead

**Kihyun**

Oh, really?

**Wonho**

Uh-huh

Aren't you at your grandparents?

**Kihyun**

Yeah

They have me decorating so I'm gonna go hide in the bathroom or something

**Wonho**

LOL you dont like decorating?

**Kihyun**

It's too messy 🙃🙃🙃

I'd rather cook but I'm not allowed in the kitchen

**Wonho**

Why? lmao

**Kihyun**

I don't know? Usually they let me cook

Today not

**Wonho**

I'm sure it beats being at work though

**Kihyun**

Yeah :( sorry

**Wonho**

Why?

**Kihyun**

I shouldn't complain

I'm at least with family. 

**Wonho**

Oh, it's all good

Family is like that sometimes

**Kihyun**

Yeah

Mine are a bit much

That's partially why I talk to you so much 😂

**Wonho**

Oh yeah?

Not just because you like me? 😏😏

**Kihyun**

Hmm, maybe

You are kinda cool 

**Wonho**

Kinda? 

I'm the coolest of cool

People pay me to act cool

Oh. Right. 

Kihyun's smile falls and he reconsiders his feelings. He needs to calm down. This is all fake. The moment he stops paying, it all goes away. 

In fact, he probably should’ve already stopped bothering. But he was hopeful he could convince his parents. And in the meantime, talking to Wonho didn’t hurt anybody.

**Kihyun**

Haha yeah

**Wonho**

Glad you agree I'm cool

Okay, Kihyun guesses he approves of Wonho's recovery. He'll keep his head clear, but at least the older was able to steer the conversation back to a comfortable territory. 

Wonho distracts him from both his discomfort at the origin of their relationship and his dislike of decorating.

.

.

.

Walking to work is Wonho’s least favorite part of being home. He refuses to take his mom’s old car and public transportation is notoriously bad, so he sticks to commuting by foot.

At least he has Kihyun to text on his way. That makes it easier. No one bumps into him on the street, probably because of his muscles, but it makes it easy to pay attention to his phone and not so much to his surroundings. 

**Kihyun**

Who's your personal hero?

**Wonho**

My mom

**Kihyun**

That's so sweet

Is there any particular reason?

**Wonho**

One time my mom's friend was over when my ex and I came home

**Kihyun**

Sorry that might have been too personal

Their texts must have crossed paths. Wonho wants to explain anyways. It's the story of the hand's down coolest thing his mom has ever done.

**Wonho**

My mom was so cool

She threw her friend out for making homophobic comments

Well

Their not friends anymore

**Kihyun**

They’re*

Sorry, I couldn’t help it

Anyways that’s such a nice story

Wonho will never forget the words his mom had said that day. It was nice, how she had stuck up for him. He'd never felt more loved and accepted than when his mother said that there was no place for hate in her home and that her son could love whoever he wanted as long as he was happy and treated with respect. 

He would love to tell Kihyun that story in person someday. Heck, he might even consider letting him meet his mom. It seemed too soon, but his mom liked all of his friends. Kihyun just seemed really likable. 

**Wonho**

So who’s yours?

**Kihyun**

Well I was going to answer Spiderman 

But now it just seems dumb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like it's pretty evident that I like writing from Kihyun's view better, but there will be more chapters later that are Wonho heavy. . . Anyways, let me know what you thought and or follow me on Twitter :)


	10. Chapter 10

Kihyun leans heavy on the shining surface of the dark wooden counters at the front of the restaurant. Kiwoo sits on a bar stool and plays on his phone. People pass by outside, but no one has been in for the past forty minutes.

Kiwoo’s head pops up and he glances around before lowering his face to the screen once more.

"It's dead," Kihyun comments.

"No shit." Kiwoo rolls his eyes. 

"I could do without the sarcasm, you little shit."

It’s a good thing their parents aren’t here.

"Fuck off, asshole."

Kihyun is just about to retaliate when the door pushes open, letting cool air in and making the bell above the door tinkle. 

"Hi! Oh my goodness, what a nice little restaurant. The winter decorations are so cute!"

The woman that enters the store is probably in her mid-30s and very bubbly. The man that trails in behind her looks like a boyfriend that's been dragged shopping all day, even though there's no evidence to support his claim. 

"Welcome, please take a seat wherever you like," Kihyun calls with a smile from behind the counter as Kiwoo grabs two menus and glasses of water for their table. 

It doesn't take the two long to order and then Kihyun starts cooking. 

He can vaguely over hear the woman talking about basketball and the guy corrects her every once in a while. 

There's nothing that really stands out about the conversation to him until he hears the man thank his significant other. 

"I appreciate you trying to learn about the things I'm interested in."

And that sounds. . . that sounds really nice. He wants someone to make the effort for him. And it wouldn't hurt for him to learn about new things, either. It doesn’t even have to be a significant other. He should make the attempt for his friends-- maybe if he put a little more effort into his friendships, he wouldn’t feel such a divide between them. 

Once the food is done and Kiwoo has delivered it with his customer service smile, he takes his phone out and texts Yoongi, leaning against the brushed steel counter on the back wall. Here he’s out of sight of the customers. 

**Kihyun**

Hey what kind of things are you interested in

**Yoongi**

Wdym

**Kihyun**

I just realized how boring I am

He can’t just come out and tell Yoongi why he’s asking. That would be like showing weakness and the two of them didn’t do that unless it was a special occasion, like the time Yoongi’s dad passed away or when Kihyun was really struggling with his sexuality as a teenager.

Yoongi’s response has him rolling his eyes.

**Yoongi**

You just realized now?

**Kihyun**

Can you just tell me

I'm trying to be a good friend

**Yoongi**

I'm lost

**Kihyun**

We can bond over something

Something that isn't high school

**Yoongi**

Tattoos

**Kihyun**

Something that doesn't involve needles

Please

**Yoongi**

Wine

**Kihyun**

Okay

**Yoongi**

Let's drink some

**Kihyun**

Yeah

I can come after ten

**Yoongi**

I'll be home at 10.30

**Kihyun**

Ok

I'll pick up two bottles

That might not be a lot for Yoongi, but it is for Kihyun. He’s a lightweight and he knows it. Plus, it’s an amount that will save his wallet and his friend’s head. Maybe. Yoongi could also be a lightweight-- he just had no idea. His oldest friend replies with what to buy and he’s glad he doesn’t have to ask. This way he doesn’t buy the wrong kind or out himself as wine-ignorant.

**Yoongi**

Get a Cabernet and a Merlot

**Kihyun**

Okay see you later

So now at least he has plans for later. It might be something simple like drinking wine with one of his oldest friends, but it's better than sitting at home like a loser. 

Yoongi's got his own place, too. So he knows he can crash on the couch there. He loves the fact that he doesn't have to go out tonight to have a good time and do a little drinking.

And they can talk about music and wine and life. Reminiscing over the things that happened in high school was fun, but it was time for them to make new memories.

The bell above the door tinkles and Kiwoo collapses back onto the bar stool. 

“How much longer?”

“Too long.”

“What if we closed early?”

“We can’t do that.”

Kiwoo just rolls his eyes. The older cleans the restaurant prematurely, expecting no more customers that night.

**Wonho**

Hey cutie

**Kihyun**

Hey

**Wonho**

What're you up to

**Kihyun**

Just got off work

Going to a friend's house

**Wonho**

Oh, that's fun :)

**Kihyun**

Yeah

Side note

Do you know a good wine brand?

**Wonho**

No sorry

I don't drink wine often

Usually I just drink what Changkyun leaves in the fridge

**Kihyun**

Alright it's cool

I'll just pick something up

He grabs two bottles that aren't too expensive but also aren't the cheapest options and puts them in his basket. The labels that adorn the bottles are pretty cool which is what ultimately influences his decision.

Buzzing in his pocket alerts him to Wonho's response, but his hands are kind of full. He'll just text him back after he checks out. 

Snacks are a definite if he's going to get wine drunk tonight. He gets a pack of cookie dough and some pizza rolls. He remembers that Yoongi's favorite snacks are chips so he takes part in the buy one get one free deal and gets two bags. 

_ Looks good _ , he thinks after peering into his basket. 

He heads to the checkout lane and gets his reusable bags ready so that he can load his groceries up. 

**Wonho**

You don't have a preference?

**Kihyun**

I don't usually drink

**Wonho**

I see

So why are you drinking tonight?

**Kihyun**

No real reason

It's his turn to pay now so he pockets his phone and makes polite small talk with the cashier, showing her his ID and then paying with his card. 

Then he's out of the grocery store and walking to the bus station to ride across town to Yoongi's. His backpack holds his change of clothes and toothbrush. At the bus station, he sits on a bench, ignoring two giggling girls who he suspects are drunk. Their eyes follow him for a minute, but he pays them no mind.

**Wonho**

Just so long as you're not upset

Or smth 😅😅

**Kihyun**

No haha

What're you up to tonight?

**Wonho**

Nothing

Might stay at the gym a little longer

So that's why it takes him so long to respond. Sometimes Wonho texts Kihyun between sets-- which is cool. Kihyun greatly admires the older’s self-discipline when it comes to working out. He wishes he had that kind of determination, but then again, he didn’t want to have muscles like that with his slender frame.

**Kihyun**

What're you working out today?

He asks to make conversation. By the time the bus comes, he doesn't get a response. He settles himself into a window seat. There aren't many people on the bus, but it is almost eleven on a Tuesday night. 

**Wonho**

Legs

And abs of course

**Kihyun**

You and your abs

**Yoongi**

Are you on your way

**Kihyun**

Almost there

**Yoongi**

Ok

**Wonho**

Maybe one day I'll let you touch them 😏😏

**Kihyun**

Don't get ahead of yourself bucko

The palm of his hand meets his forehead, causing the drunk girls to giggle at him. 

Why did he say that?

**Wonho**

Bucko lol

You're cute

**Kihyun**

🙄

I'm at my friend's

I'm gonna go

**Wonho**

Have fun

**Kihyun**

Thanks

Have a good workout and good night

**Wonho**

Night Cutie

I'll accept any drunk selfies you take

Kihyun shoves his phone in his pocket as he gets off the bus and makes his way to Yoongi's apartment.  _ Drunk selfies, as if.  _

The place isn't the nicest, so he doesn't have to be buzzed in or let in. It is, however, in working condition with no peeling paint or leaky pipes. Ultimately, the complex gets his seal of approval.

"Yo," Yoongi says when he opens the door. 

Kihyun walks in and the door closes behind him. 

"What's up?"

Kihyun sets the snacks and wine out on the table and Yoongi grabs two glasses. 

"No wine glasses?"

"Do I look like I care?" 

Like child's play, Yoongi opens the first bottle and pours their drinks like a well-practiced sommelier.

The wine smells weird, but it’s not necessarily bad. Yoongi’s apartment actually smells clean, like Pine Sol, so the scents don’t clash.

"You're the wine connoisseur, buddy."

Yoongi rolls his eyes, "shut up and drink." He shoves a glass into Kihyun's hand. 

"All of it?"

"Yepp. Let's fucking go."

Yoongi holds his glass out and Kihyun gently knocks his against it. 

With a grimace at the aftertaste of the dry red (or at least he thinks that's how it's described), he downs his first glass. 

"Atta boy. Now, tell me what's up." Yoongi pours more in both of their glasses. 

"Nothing's up. I was just bored of sitting at home."

"Fair.”

“What’s up with you?” Kihyun asks. 

“I'm moving to Seoul."

"You are?"

"Yeah. My friend's opening a tattoo parlor there so I'm moving with him." Yoongi’s eyes stay trained on the ceiling and Kihyun nods in recognition, eyes watching the wall. 

"Oh, the one you've been working with."

"Yeah, him."

"Very cool. Where is it?"

"South Street."

"I work on South Street," Kihyun says excitedly. 

"We can hang out more. You gotta show me the best bars."

"I mean, I can ask Minhyuk."

Yoongi nods, understanding that Kihyun doesn’t drink often. 

"Finish that glass by the time I get back." He points accusingly at Kihyun’s half full cup.

Kihyun notices that his glass is empty and he sips at his glass as Yoongi walks to the bathroom. 

The second glass doesn't taste as bad and his cheeks start to feel warm. 

Yoongi comes back and refills their glasses. 

“One time I went to a winery with my mom. I saw how they made it all.”

“Oh, that’s cool. Like in barrels right?”

“That’s how they age it. The kind of wood the barrel is made of is how it gets  _ oaky hints _ and stuff like that.”

While most of the night has them been catching up and drinking, he at least learns something. 

By the time they've killed the first bottle, they're playing low stakes truth or dare with a Canadian TV show playing in the background. 

"Give me your phone," Yoongi slurs.  _ Definitely a lightweight _ , Kihyun thinks. 

Kihyun hands it to him with a sleepy blink before reaching for his glass again.

"What's this? Instant Soulmate? You lookin' to date someone, Ki?"

He shrugs, cheeks blushed from alcohol, "maybe."

"I didn't realize big was your type."

"You're supposed to be taking embarrassing photos to post, not going through my conversations."

He holds his glass up and takes a long sip before looking sleepily at the camera. 

"Let's see how your boy likes this."

"What? Why did you do that?" He whines.

"Retribution for making me eat that pizza roll."

"It wasn't that bad!"

"I burned my fucking tongue."

Kihyun rolls his eyes, "how are you ever going to practice your tongue technology now?"

"Shut up. We don't talk about that anymore, Hamster."

. . .

Kihyun wakes up feeling like he ran into a brick wall and then fell on the concrete sidewalk and got scraped down it. 

He reaches for his phone.

**Kihyun**

Here's your drunk selfie

He groans and accidentally rolls off the couch.

"Shut up!" Yoongi yells from his room. Curse this small apartment.

"Fuck off."

He settles himself back on the couch. 

**Wonho**

LMAO you're so cute

I didn't think you actually would

**Kihyun**

It was his idea

He has zero recognition of sending the second selfie of both him and Yoongi. Despite the fact that they're both clearly wasted, it's funny. He saves it. 

**Kihyun**

Sorry

That was apparently revenge for truth or dare

**Wonho**

It's fine lol

You're cute

Even when wine drunk

**Kihyun**

Why are you up so early?

**Wonho**

Have you looked at the time lol

Oh shit. It's so late in the day already. He’s screwed.

He stands up and sways a little before grabbing his cup from yesterday and heading for the kitchen. 

It's not super messy, surprisingly. He fills his cup and chugs some water. He tidies a few things around the kitchen and drinks another glass before trudging back into the living room. He shoves his stuff into his backpack and makes sure it's not too messy. 

He pokes his head into Yoongi's room where the older is laying with his arms over his eyes. 

"Bye, asshole."

"See you, dick."

With that, he leaves and catches the bus. 

**Mom**

Will you be home soon?

Fuck, that text was from hours ago.

**Kihyun**

I'm on my way now.

He switches to the dating app and gets on Wonho's thread. 

**Kihyun**

I'm screwed

This is why I don't drink

**Wonho**

Hahah you don't do it often

I'm sure it's fine

**Kihyun**

I gotta go

I'm with the lord now

**Wonho**

lol ok

have a good day

**Kihyun**

If my mom doesn't kill me

But have a good day too

He gets home and apologizes to his mom who just nods. 

At least she doesn’t say anything. Maybe she’s ready to let Kihyun grow up some more.

In an effort to feel better, he eats and drinks water then hits the shower.

The walls of the shower are shinier than normal, wet with water. He’s thinking about Wonho. And not in a weird way. 

Just about how nice he is.

The pounding in his head resumes when he ducks his head out of the spray of the shower head. 

It’ll be a long while before he drinks again.

.

.

.

The apartment is decked out in tinsel and gifts dot all the surfaces, wrapped in pretty papers and brilliant bows. Wonho sits in his nicest navy blue sweater and some khakis he probably hasn’t worn in three years. They’re tight, but his butt looks good-- not that he’s trying to impress any of his mom’s cougar friends.

His mom's annual Christmas party is the same kind of thing as usual. He's not sure if that's a good thing or not.

When Wonho was younger, it used to be fun. All of the older ladies would ask him questions about school and sports and his plans. As he got older, those questions became loaded. He didn't feel the same kind of existential dread when it came to answering as he used to, but it didn’t make things that much better. He would take it as a win though. 

Things seem different this year and he doesn't know why.

His mom threw the party like usual, with the same decorations hung in the same spots. Most of the same guests were in attendance, although a few of the women were rotated out with people that had missed last year's party. He supposed it was nice that his mother had her own stable core group of friends.

Drinks, mostly red and white wines, were flowing this year as usual. It all just felt different.

Wonho was only in attendance because he liked to hear his mom talk about how proud of him she is. It didn't hurt that all the other ladies gushed about how kind, handsome, and smart he is. 

The problem is that now most of them are intoxicated and they've turned the TV on to some Christmas movie with an ultra attractive male lead for them to thirst over. 

He's never been more uncomfortable in his life. 

It's not that older women shouldn't be allowed to have sexual preferences or anything like that, he just really wishes they weren't his mom's friends that he'd grown up with. Hell, he was pretty sure Ms. Kang was looking at him funny. 

**Wonho**

Kihyun

OMG

please

**Kihyun**

What? What is it?

**Wonho**

My mom has her friends over

And theyre all wine drunk

I'm afraid

**Kihyun**

Wait a minute?

You're afraid of a bunch of drunk middle aged women?

**Wonho**

You never saw desperate housewives or real housewives or whatever it was called?

**Kihyun**

That reality TV show?

**Wonho**

Yeah

**Kihyun**

No

I don't watch reality TV

**Wonho**

But you knew what it was

**Kihyun**

My co-worker Hyungwon talks about stuff like that all the time

**Wonho**

I don't think I ever asked you where you work

**Kihyun**

Oh, just a coffee shop off campus

**Wonho**

I work off campus too

What part of the city?

**Kihyun**

South Central

**Wonho**

Nvm

I work Uptown

**Kihyun**

What exactly do you do for work?

**Wonho**

I work at the hospital

**Kihyun**

Oh! I guess that makes sense lol

**Wonho**

Why's that?

**Kihyun**

Because didn't you say you wanted to be in sports medicine/PT?

**Wonho**

You remember that?

**Kihyun**

Oh yeah haha

Why wouldn’t I?

Wonho is tickled that Kihyun bothered to remember something about him. It's not even a big deal, really. Kihyun was just so different than any other guy he'd met on a dating app. He didn't seem like he wanted to smash and pass, instead he seemed genuinely interested in getting to know Wonho.

**Wonho**

Yikes

I'm big scared

**Kihyun**

What happened?

**Wonho**

They turned the TV off

Theyre talking about how handsome I am

SOS send help

**Kihyun**

LMAO you'll be fine

**Wonho**

You dont understand

One just told me I should model for one of those sexy calendars

**Kihyun**

I take it back

Yikes indeed

Why don’t you just go to your room?

**Wonho**

I cant lose my status as the favorite son

**Kihyun**

You have a brother?

**Wonho**

No but the other ladies have kids

I won’t be upstaged

**Kihyun**

LMAO 

**Wonho**

One just tried to set me up with her daughter

I panicked

Gotta blast

“Wonho, dearest, you should take my Wheein out sometime. She’s single and in medical school.”

“Oh, Wheein is really nice and so smart, but I’m seeing someone right now.”

Is that a total lie? Did he just lie to poor Ms. Park? Well, not really. 

Kihyun is the perfect justification. And he doesn’t have to mention the fact that he’s into a man. That part he can just omit and his mom won’t have to let anymore of her friends go. 

“Oh? Well good for you, Honey. What’s she like?”

“Wonderful. A very kind person who really enjoys cooking and makes music.” He chooses his words very carefully to avoid making Kihyun out to be a girl, but to also not give himself away. 

He begins to feel like he should go to his room. He’s never been very good at lying and it was only a matter of time before someone caught on to the fact that he wasn’t using gendered pronouns. 

For some relief, he texts his flatmate group chat. 

**Wonho**

Hey Google at what age do old women stop trying to set you up with their daughters?

**Jooheon**

Set me up

**Changkyun**

Was she hot?

**Shownu**

Aren’t you gay

**Jooheon**

Show some class Dad

**Wonho**

I mean I like who I like

**Changkyun**

I don’t second guess

**Jooheon**

I just roll the dice

**Wonho**

It’s just uncomfortable

**Jooheon**

You ruined it

We had Rae Sremmurd going

**Changkyun**

What if your mom tried to set you up with one of their sons

I can see her doing that

She’s a savage

**Shownu**

Is that how you spell that

**Jooheon**

Yes

To btoh

**Wonho**

She wouldnt out me like that

**Changkyun**

Jus imagine how funny

Random mom: Oh Wonho you should date my daughter

Wonho’s mom: do u have a son

**Jooheon**

Wonho: *nervous chuckle, flees the country*

**Wonho**

🙄🙄

**Shownu**

Haha just like that time those girls asked Wonho to be their third

**Changkyun**

Skskskd Shownu-

**Jooheon**

LMAOO taht face exactly

**Wonho**

Good bye

I did not come here for this

. . .

“Sweetie? Why didn’t you correct Kyung Hee about having a girlfriend?”

He shrugs, trying to seem nonchalant, “didn’t seem worth correcting. It’s not like we’re dating yet.”

A soft frown forms on her weathered face, “you know that’s not what I meant.”

“It’s not a big deal, mom.”

“You’re more important to me than any of them. I don’t want you to feel pressured about your sexuality.”

“I know. Thank you.”

And he really does know.

They don't need to say anything more. 

His mom has always wanted nothing but the best for him. She has loved and accepted him at every turn on the path of his life. Working her butt off to provide for him, cooking for him, supporting him-- he really did have the best mom.


	11. Chapter 11

"Hey baby boy." Kihyun doesn't look up. He barely even registers the words. He knows no one is calling him that.

There isn't a person on this Earth dumb enough to do that. He will, intentionally, send someone to their own ring of hell for calling him that.

"Ignoring me, huh? I like a challenge." 

The voice is too close.

Kihyun looks up then, "excuse me?"

"Now you'll look at me." He wishes he didn’t. Old men this direct are skeevy as hell.

"I don't appreciate being spoken to in that manner."

"Why not?"

Kihyun frowns and rolls his eyes, "because I'm a person that isn't obligated to respond to you when you're speaking to me like I'm an object. Now, I'll be going."

"Aw, come on. Don't be like that."

Kihyun ignores the older man and makes his way to a different section of the music store to make sure that the man doesn't follow him. 

He does.

With shaky fingers, he calls Minhyuk. The trembles belie his faux confidence. Kihyun wants to believe he could defend himself against this man given how young and spry he is, but the man is significantly larger and also not that old.

Luckily, Minhyuk always picks up his phone. 

"Hello?"

"Hey Min. I'll be there in like ten minutes. I'm leaving the music store on third street now."

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah. They didn't have the album you wanted or my guitar, so I'm on my way."

"Do I need to call someone?"

"No, I'm leaving now." He exits the store and walks a block or two, switching directions in case the man had followed him out of the store, but keep Minhyuk on the line the whole time. "There was a weird old man hitting on me. I think I lost him."

"Can you get in a cab or something? I don't want you walking around with a creep after you."

"I'll be fine. I haven't seen him in a few minutes. Besides, I'm going home soon. Just have to stop at the grocery store near my house."

He makes his way to the subway station, still talking to Minhyuk. There's no sign of the man so he breathes easier. 

"Hey, I'm at the subway station now. It's pretty crowded, so I'm gonna let you go."

"You won't have service, but make sure to stay somewhere where people can help you."

"I will. Thanks, Minhyukkie."

"Anytime Kiki."

They hang up and Kihyun makes his way down the stairs. The subway station is not crowded, but it's also not deserted. The fluorescent lights cast an eery glow, but it's still daytime so he won't be creeped out when he walks home. He stands near the benches where a young mother and an old couple sit, staring at his phone. 

There's no signal. 

He's lucky that that weird guy left him alone but he stills feels a little shaken. 

Nothing like an aggressive, older man to make you feel uncomfortable and objectified. 

When the tram arrives and the doors pull open, he makes sure the single mom with her two young kids and the older couple get on before entering himself. 

He picks an empty seat and plops down into it, sighing due to how tired he is. He's got to work the dinner shift tonight so his parents can go out. It won't be busy since it's a Tuesday. He just hopes Kiwoo will actually wait tables so that he can cook. The division of tasks would make the night bearable. 

**Hyungwon**

Yo

You got a min

**Kihyun**

What's up?

**Hyungwon**

Just wanted to tell you bout my date yesterday

**Kihyun**

Oh God

**Hyungwon**

Met this dude on Farmers Only

**Kihyun**

Hyungwon

Hyungwon wait

Hyungwon you are not a farmer

Kihyun cannot help the ugly laugh he lets out. He straight up cackles at Hyungwon’s message. He wonders what could possibly possess Hyungwon to start using Farmers Only. 

**Hyungwon**

Shhh

Anyways

As I was saying

I meet this dude

**Kihyun**

I don't like where this is going

**Hyungwon**

We go on a date

Simmer down Ki

Kihyun waits for Hyungwon to finish sending his next few messages before answering, knowing full well there will be a lot to unpack. He's almost disappointed he doesn't get to have this conversation in person, though. The taller man is such a good story teller with his tone, inflection, and expressions. Plus, he talks with his hands and Kihyun always thought it was funny to watch people who did that talk.

**Hyungwon**

He shows up deadass in overalls

**Kihyun**

_ You did meet on farmer's only _

He doesn't hit send yet, but there's no way he's going to let that one slide. He feels the need to send something snarky in his soul. 

**Hyungwon**

And when he finds me for our date

Has the nerve to say he thought I was a woman

And that he's not interested because I can't have kids

To work the farm for him

So

Needless to say

I'm not counting it as a date anymore, but is that not ridiculous?

He hits send on his first text before firing off his agreement. 

**Kihyun**

You did meet on farmer's only

That's super wild though

Evidently he has lots going on

But wait, why did he think you were a woman?

**Hyungwon**

I have no idea!

That's what I want to know

It's not like I posted a picture of myself in drag or something

**Kihyun**

You mean you didn't put the legendary wig photos as your profile photos?

**Hyungwon**

As fabulous as I looked

No

**Kihyun**

This is literally something that would only happen to you

**Hyungwon**

I just wanna know

How and why he thought i was a woman

Like my name is on there

And my pictures are all me

He obviously had his settings set to prefers men

**Kihyun**

It’s super weird

**Hyungwon**

If he wants kids why would he leave it set to men

**Kihyun**

Maybe he didn’t realize it was

LMAO what if he thought you were just a tom boy-ish girl

He thinks about it and it’s kind of a stretch. Dating apps can be confusing, he supposes, but really only for the first few days. After that, they’re not that difficult. 

**Hyungwon**

Shut up

I don’t look anything like a girl and the app clearly shows me as a man

Kihyun snickers and gets off the subway and heads to the grocery store, then walks the three blocks to the restaurant. Over the course of running the errands, he says good bye to Hyungwon and gets a text from Minhyuk.

**Minhyuk**

Test me wenh yuo get hoem

**Kihyun**

I just got to the restaurant

**Minhyuk**

GOod

.

.

.

**Changkyun**

Merry fucking Christmas

**Jooheon**

It's not for another week

Heathen

**Shownu**

Merry Christmas to you too

**Wonho**

merry chrysler

**Jooheon**

Kyun, get the genital cuff

he's doing it again

**Changkyun**

How many times do we have to teach you this lesson, old man

**Jooheon**

Christine Sideklo is not funny

**Shownu**

Did you spell that wrong?

**Changkyun**

Does it matter? 

**Jooheon**

Next person to send a terrible vine reference is out of the chat

**Wonho**

How are you going to decide that?

**Changkyun**

3/4 vote

**Jooheon**

What if there's a tie

**Shownu**

How about we don't kick anyone out of the chat?

**Wonho**

I vote Shownu out

**Shownu**

That wasn't a vine reference??

**Changkyun**

I vote out

**Shownu**

Keep me in

You'll get in too much trouble w/o me

**Jooheon**

I vote Nunu in!!!!!

**Changkyun**

Fine

You can stay

You're on thing fucking ice, Shownu

**Wonho**

Why is this so dramatic?

**Jooheon**

Idk but it's fun this wya

Wonho shakes his head. He really does miss his flatmates. They're a great bunch of guys, even if they are a little nuts.

He wonders what they would think of Kihyun or if they would all get along. 

Then again, he doesn’t know if he gets along with Kihyun either. They text a lot but what if they don’t have any chemistry in real life?

. . .

“Do you believe in love at first sight?”

Wonho stops measuring scoops of protein power and looks at Seungcheol. 

“That person over there on the treadmill with the long hair? Wow.”

“Well, I think his boyfriend just joined him.”

“Who-- oh, wow. Yeah, love at first sight is real.”

“Both of them, Seungcheol? Really?”

“Don’t judge me. I’m not the one in love with an e-boy.”

Wonho rolls his eyes, “I’m not in love with him and he’s not an e-boy.”

“Someone you met on the internet, whatever. It’s the same difference.”

“It really isn’t, but okay.”

Seungcheol sighs and continues to stare dreamily at the two men. 

Wonho finishes preparing his protein shake and then puts his things back into his backpack. 

“I’m ready to go.”

“Do you think I should talk to them?”

“No. They’re here to work out.”

“I could work out with them.”

“But we just--”

Seungcheol takes off, waving after him. 

Wonho sighs. So much for getting ramen after their work out.

Without waiting to see what happens between the three, Wonho leaves the gym. His fingers tap out a message to Kihyun before he can think too much about it. 

**Wonho**

I need new friends 

**Kihyun**

Why? Lol

**Wonho**

Mine are dumb

And they ditch me a lot

**Kihyun**

Aww, poor baby

**Wonho**

I’m not a baby 😤😤

**Kihyun**

Okay

Baby

**Wonho**

Babies don’t have muscles like this

He attaches a selfie he just took, Seungcheol visibly struggling to lift the bar off his chest in the background. Wonho told him to adjust the plates, but he didn't listen.

**Kihyun**

Is your friend okay? 

He looks like he’s dying there

**Wonho**

He’s fine just weak

Besides, he deserves it for ditching me

**Kihyun**

How did he ditch you?

**Wonho**

We were supposed to go get ramen

But he decided to go hit on some guys instead

**Kihyun**

Oh lmao

Sucks to be you

**Wonho**

Now I’m just gonna eat ramen by myself

At home

All alone

**Kihyun**

Okay and?

**Wonho**

You could eat ramen with me sometime

Like when we get back to school

**Kihyun**

If I ever eat ramen at school

It’s because I’ve given up

**Wonho**

But its so good!!

  
**Kihyun**

Yeah, but I make it all the time

I’m sick of it

**Wonho**

I need to try it though 🥺🥺

**Kihyun**

Fine

**Wonho**

So you’ll make it?

For me?

**Kihyun**

I guess lol

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Work and bridesmaid duties are slowly killing me :) Let me know what you thought and if you decide to follow me on Twitter send me some pictures you like of Monsta X to cheer me up :) :)


	12. Chapter 12

Worn vinyl crinkles underneath of his acquaintances as they shift around the bench to the beat of the song. The lights flash and the screen displays a mixed up movie trailer as a background for the lyrics. Karaoke with near strangers is fun for extroverts, but Kihyun is as introverted as they come. 

Oddly enough, so is Yoongi, yet here they are. 

The music playing is not his taste. 

Luckily, Wonho seems to be online and he has this incredible ability to take Kihyun’s mind off of things. 

**Wonho**

What're you up to?

**Kihyun**

Oh just at karaoke with some friends

**Wonho**

That sounds fun

I love karaoke

**Kihyun**

Really? Do you sing too?

**Wonho**

Yeah

But I'm not great at it

**Kihyun**

That doesn't matter

As long as you have fun

Kihyun types that out and it feels fake. He knows he's judgemental when it comes to people's singing-- it comes with the territory for him. As a music major with vocal chords dipped in gold, everyone is a competition. Someone with weaknesses to be identified and exploited and-- he has to remember this is for fun. Karaoke isn’t about winning or losing. He has to be conscious of that fact. 

He remembers a time when his classmates were organizing a trip to a local middle school to teach kids about singing. They hadn’t invited him because he would “make the kids cry, probably.”

They weren’t technically wrong. 

**Wonho**

I love singing and making music

**Kihyun**

That's great

Music is such a good way to express yourself

Do you sing on your tracks?

**Wonho**

Not always

When I make my music I sometimes do

It's good enough for my soundcloud followers lol

The rap song playing ends and Kihyun blinks and looks up at the screen. Yoongi hands him the microphone. 

"Your turn."

"Kihyun! Let me pick your song."

He shrugs and gives a quick nod in agreement, allowing Yoongi's friend to pick the song. 

The almost stranger grins mischievously and a song starts to play. 

"Michael Jackson? Really?"

"Jokes on you because Kihyun can actually sing."

Kihyun ignores the group behind him. His friends are dumbasses anyways.

As expected, Kihyun kills the song. Yoongi's friend looks humbled in some kind of way and that's enough for him. 

Their other friends all continue to joke around, picking pop songs for their next rounds and largely leaving Kihyun to his own devices again.

Yoongi smacks the phone out of his hand when he goes to text Wonho.

"Quit texting your secret lover and pay attention to us."

"You hate attention."

"I do not."

"You're literally wearing a shirt that says no."

"Yeah, for no texting."

Kihyun rolls his eyes. 

Yoongi doesn't say anything.

"Is this enough attention for you?" He sasses.

Yoongi shakes his head, "no, I'd actually like you to hold my hand and sing me songs."

"Shut up."

"You won't."

"Bet. Somebody give me a microphone."

It takes them the rest of the song, but it's less than thirty seconds, to hand Kihyun a mic. 

He chooses a song that will suit them both, "New York" by Jay Z and Alicia Keys to sing with him. 

The rap and the vocals are a good mix for their skill sets, even if Yoongi claimed he didn't rap anymore.

The rest of the group howls as Kihyun sings, dragging Yoongi's arm with his own to dance to the song. 

All in all, they have a good time performing.

They pay attention to the next few songs and then perform another one. 

When they sit back down, Yoongi scowls and slides him back his phone.

"We're going soon. I guess you don't want to hit the bars with us?"

"No thanks. I'll catch you guys another time."

"Alright. Let me know when you get home."

"Yeah, I will. You too."

Kihyun texts Wonho as he walks home. 

**Kihyun**

Sorry I was at karaoke with some friends

**Wonho**

Yeah you told me lol

Did you have fun?

**Kihyun**

Yeah lol

I love karaoke

It’s not a lie. He does love karaoke, but only when he’s with his own group of friends.

**Wonho**

We should go

Like when we get back to school

**Kihyun**

That could be really fun

**Wonho**

I can't wait to hear you sing for me

Kihyun's cheeks flame. He knows that's not the context that Wonho meant it in, but he can't help that his mind goes there. To sex. As dirty and messy as it is.

What’s wrong with him? That’s a virtual stranger he’s thinking about.

**Kihyun**

Don't get your hopes up too high

I’m not as good as you think I am

Well, that’s probably true. Kihyun knows he’s gifted with the voice of an angel, but every time people hear it they find something to critique. He’s used to it.

**Wonho**

Don't talk down about urself 😠

**Kihyun**

Alright alright

_ There goes, like, half of my personality _ , he thinks.

They text while he walks home and even until he's almost asleep half an hour later. He tells Wonho good night and puts his phone away for the night.

He squishes his face into the pillow and sighs.

Is it in Wonho's job description to set up dates? 

.

.

.

**Wonho**

So I just left the gym

You'll never guess what happened

**Kihyun**

What?

Wonho hadn't meant to text Kihyun, but there was no reason he couldn't share this story with him. It wasn't an inside joke, even if he had meant to send it to his roommates chat. 

**Wonho**

I actually saw someone doing one of those gym challenge videos

The guy sprinted across 8 treadmills then did a handstand on a dumbbell

**Kihyun**

I feel like that's kind of obnoxious

**Wonho**

It is

Nobody else could be "in his area" the whole time

**Kihyun**

I've only ever been in like two gyms but I feel like that's a lot of space

**Wonho**

Yeah

It was

The worst part was that he was small

It was kinda a dick move

But I walked by at the end with a weight twice as heavy

**Kihyun**

Show off lmao

**Wonho**

🤷‍♂️

**Kihyun**

What if the video goes viral

**Wonho**

I'll make a fitness intragram

Point myself out in the background

**Kihyun**

You'll be insta famous in no time lol

But seriously why don't you make one?

**Wonho**

I was jk

I'm not really interested in doing that

There's something really nice about the way Kihyun just responds. It doesn't matter if Wonho asks him a deep, philosophical question or sends him something funny he just saw happening. Kihyun always answers and makes things into a fun conversation.

It's kind of like when he's with his friends. Easy. 

**Kihyun**

It seems like a lot of work

But I guess filming and posting is the easy part

You've already got the body for it

**Wonho**

Thank you 😉😏

I work out so that small animals can lay comfortably on me

**Kihyun**

Is that an innuendo

**Wonho**

No 😂😂

Not unless you want it to be

**Kihyun**

I never told you my high school nickname 

This is so reassuring

**Wonho**

Well now you have to tell me

**Kihyun**

Fuck

**Wonho**

I hate it when you curse 😞

**Kihyun**

Do you actually?

**Wonho**

Well, not just you

I dont really like cursing

Its kinda lame Ik

**Kihyun**

That's not lame

You should've told me sooner

**Wonho**

You don't curse all that often

So it's fine

Wonho appreciates that Kihyun is so accepting of his distaste for curse words.

He tosses the phone onto his bed as gently as he can (if there is a way to softly throw something) and heads into the bathroom to brush his teeth. His mom's stuff is all over the counter, but she had been running late this morning. Plus, she'd been so busy lately. He doesn't blame her. 

Maybe he should try to clean up some to help her out more. 

The sink is pretty clean, but after he rinses his mouth, he gets the blue sponge-- specifically for cleaning-- from under the kitchen sink and the bathroom cleaner from under the bathroom sink. He tries to organize his mom's stuff somewhat after he wipes down the white tile basin and counter top. 

There. That's one thing she won't have to do. He puts them away and goes to get his phone. 

**Kihyun**

I'll do my best not to

I understand bc I hate some words too

**Wonho**

Like what?

His phone fits into the pocket of his sweatpants, so he carries it with him to the kitchen and starts to clean. 

"Sweetie? What're you doing?"

"Just cleaning," he answers. 

"That's dishwashing detergent."

He looks up at her and then back at the counter top, "you mean this won't clean it?"

She sighs heavily, "just wipe it off. I can't believe you don't remember to use the spray."

"I thought that was window cleaner."

"You can use it for the counters too."

He smiles sheepishly. 

She gives him the look-- the ‘how did I raise such an idiot’ one-- and turns around back into her room. 

_ That's enough cleaning for today _ , Wonho thinks and heads to his own bed once he's done. 

**Kihyun**

I don't like the r-word, the w-word, or the f-word

**Wonho**

But you just said the f word

**Kihyun**

No like the slur

For gay people

**Wonho**

Oooh I see now

And what're the other two?

**Kihyun**

R*tard and wh*re

**Wonho**

Oh, totally fair. I don't use the r-word either

**Kihyun**

That's good

**Wonho**

Not that I disagree but why don't you like the w-word

**Kihyun**

Because it's meant to demean sex workers

**Wonho**

Oh okay

Kihyun stops responding and given how late it is, he's probably asleep. Wonho thinks he should do the same, but instead he checks the other messages on the app and responds to a few people. None of them really interest him, though. The other interactions all feel forced or focus too heavily on sex. He unmatches most of the other people. 

If things pan out with Kihyun, he won't ever meet them anyways. 

. . .

**Changkyun**

Can we have a big family dinner when we get back

I miss Korean food

**Jooheon**

How are we gonna cook

**Wonho**

Let's get take out! 

I got a Christmas bonus 😛

**Shownu**

I'm down

But I'm vegetarian now

**Jooheon**

YOU"RE WHAT

**Wonho**

Vegetarian?

You?

**Changkyun**

Since when?

**Jooheon**

How are you gonna survive?

**Changkyun**

What happened?

**Wonho**

This is really unlike you

**Shownu**

Well I'm trying it

Moonbyul wants to go vegetarian 

**Changkyun**

Oh so it's a "we" thing

**Jooheon**

That's so sweet? 

Shownu is the perfect man

**Wonho**

That's the kind of support we all need in life

**Shownu**

Thanks?

**Jooheon**

So

How's America Daniel?

**Wonho**

Dannnnnny

**Changkyun**

I went on a date last night and the girl greeted me in Japanese

So there's that

**Shownu**

But you're Korean

**Jooheon**

Americans are dumb af

Shit like that happens to me all the time when I visit my sister

**Wonho**

Sorry Kyun :(

**Changkyun**

I told her how racist it was and then left

But the worst part was I didn't get my dick wet

**Wonho**

🙄

**Jooheon**

🙄🙄🙄

**Shownu**

...

**Changkyun**

What?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can count on one hand the number of chapters until they meet each other!! V exciting!


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to the angsty part. It won't be too long.

Things are slow in the restaurant so Kihyun’s mom takes off, leaving him in charge of serving people while his dad cooks. It’s not a bad thing. They should be done for the evening given that it’s eight o’clock on a Wednesday. 

He’s bored. All the tables have been cleaned, but it’s too early to mop the floors. He knows that as soon as he does, a customer will come in and spill something. It’s just the way the world works. Murphy’s Law. 

He goes back to checking his phone. There’s nothing new on Twitter so he opens the Instant Soulmate app to message Wonho. 

It’s something he’s been putting off for a long time. 

**Kihyun**

So

I've been meaning to ask you

Do you use the other part of this app too?

**Wonho**

Yeah actually

I'm not very good at it apparently haha

You're the only normal person that talks to me on the app

Kihyun wonders why that is. He thinks Wonho is great. If he can fake interest, flirt, and keep up a conversation this well, he should have people eating out of the palm of his hands. Plus, he's hot as hell. There's no way his DM's aren't full of other people asking for dates. 

He doubts that Wonho is telling the truth. But that's probably a good business decision on his end. He wouldn't be a very convincing fake boyfriend if he admits he's talking to a ton of other people. 

Kihyun wonders if it's normal to have a fake boyfriend for so long, but figures, given that it's break, people would talk a lot even to a fake significant other. Wonho must be really good at this. He must make a lot of money and make a lot of people feel this way.

Fuck.

Kihyun had been feeling special, but now. . . now he just felt phony and fake and dumb. He had been stupid enough to forget what this was and now he was just one of many. Someone Wonho talked to out of obligation and with the expectation of being paid.

**Kihyun**

Oh haha

I thought you'd be really popular based on how much I like you

**Wonho**

You like me huh?

**Kihyun**

I meant like talking to you

**Wonho**

Uh huh

Sure

But I like talking to you too, cutie ;)

  
  


The last few texts feel like needles under his skin. He's stressed now. He can feel it, little pin pricks that center between his eyes and along his spine. 

His stomach churns as he thinks about how many people Wonho must call cutie. He probably can't remember all of their names. 

Why did he feel prevaricated to? Wonho had done what was needed of him and nothing more. It wasn't his fault that Kihyun was an idiot.

Stupid. How could he forget that none of this was real? That Wonho was dispensing attention for money like a vending machine.

It's time to hit the panic button.

**Kihyun**

Hey srry something came up and I gotta go

His grammatical tendencies deplete and he sends the message quickly. 

**Wonho**

Oh okay

Text me later?

It's time he ends things. 

He doesn't respond to the message.

.

.

.

**Wonho**

Hey Cutie

What're you up to today

Wonho types the next day once he wakes up. Between spending time with his mom and work, this is the only time he'll have where he'll be able to sit and talk to Kihyun today.

There's no immediate response and although Wonho suspects Kihyun is probably with family, he definitely got the vibe that the younger was attached to his phone. 

It's been a few hours since they talked last night (fifteen to be precise) and Kihyun's normally up before him anyways. He's sure it's just that he's busy.

But he can't stop thinking about it. 

Kihyun had seemed kind of off last night. He didn't want things to be weird between them. They were so close to going back to school and Wonho couldn't wait to take the younger on a real date. Or meet up, at the very least.

Clingy is the last thing he wants to be, so he waits an hour before following up to his messages.

**Wonho**

Not to be clingy, but I miss you ahaha

_ Isn't it ironic that I didn't want a boyfriend, but now depend on Kihyun's attention? _ His thoughts center on Kihyun and how much he wants to date the guy. 

It feels ridiculous because they met online. Online dating felt like a trap and something that didn't work out, but this time it might. None of his friends had had successful online dating stories.

But it's Cutie Kihyun he's talking about. Someone he's never seen in real life or heard the voice of, but is attached to nonetheless.

**Kihyun**

What do you get paid by the message

Wonho's eyebrows furrow as he reads the text. What is that supposed to mean?

**Wonho**

What?

No?

Did I say smth wrong?

The three dots that signify Kihyun is typing appear and disappear several times. Wonho waits patiently for the texts. 

**Kihyun**

Look, I can't do this anymore. I'm an idiot. I got attached to you. I lost sight of the fact that this is all fake. It's all my fault. You played your part too well, but I can't fault you for that. I kept talking to you even though my parents didn't believe you could be into me. I did this all to myself. I hate feeling phony and paying you to keep this up isn't going to work anymore. So, thanks, I guess. You were the best fake boyfriend I could have asked for.

Wonho reads the message. Then he reads it again for a second and third time.

**Wonho**

Kihyun what?

No no no no

THat's not what this is

You're not using the fake part of the site

Your profile is green not blue

Please tell me this is some kind of joke

I really like you. I like tlaking to you and maybe I wasn't sure I wanted a boyfriend at first

But I really want to meet up with you and take you on dates when we get back to school

Cutie. . . 

Please

Come back

It's useless. Kihyun never reads the messages. He tries to send him more, but then Kihyun's profile is gone.

Wonho is left alone, staring at his phone screen even after it times out and locks itself. 

He--

Did he just get dumped by someone he wasn't even in a relationship with?

And why the heck did it hurt so bad? His stomach drops and the backs of his kneecaps itch. It progresses to a burn when he realizes he doesn't have another way to find Kihyun short of searching campus.

If he could just meet Kihyun he could explain--

How could he let Kihyun even think that he was using him? 

The other messages he'd gotten made so much more sense in retrospect.

But he'd never led Kihyun on. He'd never said something to garner his distrust, had he?

He wishes he could read back through their conversations. 

Maybe it was his fault for being too flirty and comfortable with him. Coming on strong probably did come across as someone being a fake boyfriend.

But-- but it also wasn't all his fault and he recognized that.

Sure, he should've paid more attention to the instructions and learned which chat colors mean what. He sees that now. This all could have been avoided.

But Kihyun was the one jumping to conclusions and not giving him a chance to explain himself.

The younger was probably hurt, though. He couldn't imagine if he'd been in Kihyun's shoes.

What if one day the guy he was talking to decided he couldn't keep up the fake boyfriend act anymore? Or said something that hit him square in the chest and reminded him that their connection was fake? He'd probably eject himself from the situation too.

He has to explain. 

If he can, he can surely convince Kihyun to give him a shot as a real boyfriend.

Couldn't he?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who leaves comments! They really make my day!!


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you notice anything weird with the text alignment and spacing, just lmk please (or be aware of it while you read and I'll fix it when I get back on the ball.) The align function started only doing one line at a time and Idk when it started doing that, so it may be wrong towards the end (I started from the bottom up.)

Kihyun sighs. His room is quiet and everything is still. 

There’s a cold breeze and he can’t tell if it’s in the room or just in his mind.

Right. Time to get a grip. He knows he should’ve put a stop to this weeks ago. The minute his parents didn’t believe him, he should’ve said ‘thanks anyways’ and logged his ass off of the app. Cancelled his credit card payments to the company, eliminated his profile, deleted the app from his phone. 

Kihyun stops payments, suspends his account, and removes the app from his phone. That’s step one. 

Step two would be blocking Wonho from social media, but he’d never added him on Instagram or Twitter, so that solved that problem. 

Step three would be expunging Wonho’s photos. He could do that. He had the pictures to be wiped from his memory card. Physically, his fingers were capable of doing it. 

But his mind wouldn’t let him. Maybe he’d be sad a little while longer, looking at the guy he was stupid enough to believe liked him.

It was hard to let go of. He'd had so many good conversations with Wonho. It had felt so genuine. 

But it's like a band aid. He just has to rip it off before the wound festers. 

**Kihyun**

Hey Min

Got a minute?

**Minhyuk**

Yeha whast up

Kihyun almost hits send on a message asking if he can call Minhyuk. Almost.

But he doesn't. Because he doesn't want his friend to know what a dumb loser he was. It was entirely his fault that he'd gone and gotten his feelings hurt. He didn't need Minhyuk to tell him that. He also didn't know how to make the fake that he was the stupid one not apparent. 

**Kihyun**

Nvm

**Minhyuk**

U sure?

Im here fro u

**Kihyun**

Yeah

Was jw how things were

There. He lies, but it's not like Minhyuk will be able to catch him over texts. He was also a pretty good liar, except for that one time last month Minhyuk didn't believe him. And when his family didn't believe him about Wonho.

Okay, so maybe he's not a good liar, then.

**Minhyuk**

Smooth sailing so far

Pretty suspicious if u aks mr

**Kihyun**

That's good to hear

Nothing happened with your dad?

**Minhyuk**

Hse sobre atm

**Kihyun**

That's great

**Minhyuk**

How're yuor parenst

Cna u ask ur mom to sned us some frzen meals

**Kihyun**

She's already making some

But they're good

**Minhyuk**

An mini ki?

**Kihyun**

Lazy as always

How're the twins?

**Minhyuk**

Minho hsa a bf

my parents blamde me

**Kihyun**

:(

I'm sorry to hear they blamed you.

It's not your fault, you know.

But good for Minho!

Do you like him?

**Minhyuk**

Ik

And yeh hes a cutee kid

Looks kinda liek a sqiurell

Kihyun is amazed he can always read Minhyuk's texts, but he's had years of practice. He also understands that it's just because Minhyuk types fast and then hits send before he proof reads. 

And he’s happy for his family. It feels good to know that good things do happen in the world, even if they haven’t been happening to him.

**Minhyuk**

Minjung hs a bf too

I dont liek hm

hes a swuare

**Kihyun**

Well, it could be worse. . .?

**Minhyuk**

yh ig

**Kihyun**

Any special meal requests? My mom's asking

**Minhyuk**

Ill eat whatvr she maeks

:)

tll her thnks u

**Kihyun**

Will do

I'll text you later

**Minhyuk**

byee kiki

. . .

Should he text Hyungwon? He didn't really care what his co-worker thought of him. Plus, the tall man would probably be impressed that he managed to make a dating site profile and talk to someone for more than an hour. 

But he ultimately decides against it. 

Hyungwon can, unfortunately, get judgemental at times and the last thing Kihyun needs is to feel judged or be made fun of. 

So he tries to distract himself with scrolling through twitter and reading a book, but they don’t hold his interest long enough. 

Maybe if he texts Hyungwon, he'll take his mind off of how down he has been feeling. 

**Kihyun**

Hey.

How's your break?

**Hyungwon**

Hey! It's pretty good. How's yours?

**Kihyun**

Okay

I'm ready to get back to school

**Hyungwon**

Ugh me too

All of my friends already went back and my grandma is driving me insance

**Kihyun**

Oh does she live with you guys now?

**Hyungwon**

Yeah

**Kihyun**

Is it that bad?

**Hyungwon**

She's not terrible

But she's homophobic

So I'm trying to stay lowkey

**Kihyun**

Yikes :/

Sorry to hear that

**Hyungwon**

It's all good

I've just been going to guys houses

**Kihyun**

Ig that's a good solution?

Idk, be safe

**Hyungwon**

It works

What's up with you, though?

**Kihyun**

Nothing

Just been working everyday

Haven't done anything fun in a while

**Hyungwon**

Huh

No hot guys in Goyang?

**Kihyun**

Is that all you think about?

**Hyungwon**

No

I also love small animals

He’s reminded of Wonho at that text and then he’s sad all over again.

**Kihyun**

Good bye now

Hyungwon doesn't respond. Kihyun’s okay with that.

.

.

.

Wonho debates on what the best course of action from here is. 

He can try to navigate the choppy waters, or he can just turn around and head back to shore where it's safe. 

He doesn't want to, though. He wants Kihyun. He wants to forge on through the storm, into the uncertainty of the unknown. 

Something in his soul tells him that going after Kihyun is the right thing to do. 

There'll be a line he draws somewhere, later. He won't obsess over Kihyun if there's no use. Kihyun won't be his white whale. There are more people out there, more fish in the proverbial sea. 

**Wonho**

Yo

Do any of you guys know a Kihyun from the music dept?

**Jooheon**

Nah, sorry

Who's he?

**Wonho**

An acqaunitance

**Jooheon**

A what

**Wonho**

You know what I mean

He could do without Jooheon's correction of his spelling, but at least he's not asking more questions about Kihyun. It would be hard to explain. Also, he didn't want his friends to misunderstand and discourage him from pursuing Kihyun. 

**Shownu**

Yeah I know him

Yoo Kihyun, right?

He was in my music prod class

Yoo Kihyun. Wonho really likes his name. It has a pleasant ring to it. Hope blossoms in his chest. 

Shownu knows him. 

Shownu knows Kihyun.

He has to ask if there’s a way to get a hold of him, but he doesn’t want to seem too invested. He can’t let them know he’s desperate to talk to the younger man.

**Wonho**

Do you have like his phone nymber or smth

**Shownu**

No, I never talked to him

**Wonho**

Oh, damn

**Jooheon**

What do u need from him

Wonho struggles to think of a lie. 

**Wonho**

To ask him about something

**Jooheon**

Seems sus but ok

**Shownu**

I can get it when I get back to school

Wonho passes the day by working and then arranging songs for the heck of it. He's not the best singer or songwriter, but he does a good enough job considering he's just going to post it for his 400 Soundcloud followers. 

The guys keep the chat rolling, though, so it's hard for him to focus.

**Wonho**

That would be great

Thnks

**Changkyun**

Hold up

What did I miss? 

Is that the guy you were texting before we left for break?

**Jooheon**

Why would he need his number if they were already texting

Wonho has never been more grateful for Jooheon in his life. He solves the problem for him. He kind of hopes the others will go back to talking about their alien conspiracy theories or pirates or something like they have a tendency to do. Hell, he’d even take mutiny over terrible vines in the chat. They could vote him off the island for now.

**Changkyun**

Shit you right

But I wanna know waht this is rly about

Rats. He'll have to think of something believable.

**Wonho**

I talked to him one time and he recommended me a protein brand

But I forgot what it was

**Shownu**

Yoo Kihyun

Recommended you protein powder?

**Wonho**

Yepp

**Shownu**

Are we talking about the same dude?

**Wonho**

Yeah? 

**Jooheon**

What makes you say tht Nunu

**Shownu**

Kihyun is kinda small

I've never really looked but I assumed he wasn't all that muscular

**Changkyun**

Wonho you haven't switched protein brands in five years

**Wonho**

I was just considering it

Why are yall so concerned

**Shownu**

Ig im not

**Changkyun**

Why are you so defensive

Wonho doesn't answer, but he's sure the others get the read receipts. He's done being questioned. It's time for him to focus on something else now. Music is a good distraction. He hasn't posted anything in a while. Now was as good a time to work as he was going to get.

**Jooheon**

He's not answering anymore

**Changkyun**

Didn't realize it was that deep 👀👀

**Jooheon**

Stay pressed

**Shownu**

Do you guys think anyone will actually raid Area 51?

**Jooheon**

Bro

**Changkyun**

The American government will obliterate anyone that tries to get close

**Jooheon**

Do we have one of those here

**Shownu**

Probably

I’ll ask Moonbyul

**Changkyun**

Why would she know?

**Jooheon**

Aliens are part of dismantling the institutions of oppression

**Shownu**

Free the aliens

**Changkyun**

Free the aliens bro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone! Thank you for the overwhelming response last chapter (I know it's because I tore them apart lol). I promise I'll get to responding in the next few days, but I'm a lil bit of a mess today and am hoping to get some professional help tomorrow so that bad bitxh Nina makes a comeback.
> 
> Anyways, while I was formatting this the align right function was being kind of wonky so be on the look out for that and if anyone finds an instance of it and points it out, I'll fix it. 
> 
> Thanks for your patience!


	15. Chapter 15

He thought he was over it. He'd done what was best for him and jumped ship before it sank. He wasn't going down with it. 

No. He'd thrown himself a life preserver and he was going to save himself. 

“Kinhyunie, what's wrong?”

Kihyun doesn't look up, just continues to wipe down the counter, frown deepening. 

He keeps at it, staring at his reflection in the glossy, polished wood. 

If he scrubs hard enough at his reflection, maybe the guilt will go with it.

A hand settles over his own, small and wrinkled.

“Sweetie, what's going on?”

He looks at his mother’s concerned eyes and wants to be upset, but he's angry. 

“Please tell me what's upsetting you. You haven't been yourself these past few days. You've been sleeping a lot and you won't even look at your phone. Did something happen with that boy?” She talks on and on and his rage builds.

“Why would you care if I'm upset that Wonho doesn't actually like me? You don't even believe he's a real person,” he spits out, flings the rag onto the counter, and storms out of the restaurant. 

The only customer in the store turns and blinks but doesn't say anything.

. . .

Kihyun's tempted again. To call Minhyuk and tell him what he's going through.

Minhyuk seemed to be enjoying his time with his family if his Instagram story was anything to go by. 

Knowing how things were for him at home, he was happy. And he didn’t want to ruin that with his bad attitude.

So instead he agonized over his thoughts on his own. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea since his thoughts were polarizing, but he’d bounce back. 

Just as soon as his stomach stopped feeling hollow, though.

. . .

“Sweetie?” There was a soft rap at the door followed by his mom's sweet voice.

Kihyun rolled over in his bed to face the wall, knowing she'd come in soon. She always would, it was her style. 

She'd barge in and sit at the end of the bed, pestering him with questions until they were answered and she could give him advice. 

So that's what she did. 

She patted his legs through the blanket as she questioned what happened with Wonho. 

Around the time he would normally cave, he realized he couldn't. 

It was pathetic. He was the idiot that had downloaded an app for a fake boyfriend and then caught feelings for the guy who was clearly only pretending. 

Maybe he liked the idea of Wonho more than he would have liked the actual Wonho. 

But that was the thing. He had seemed so genuine right from the get go. 

It was hard to fake the things that Kihyun liked about him. He was funny, sweet, and gorgeous, yeah, but that wasn't his only appeal. He was also a hard worker-- if the amount of times he was working and his dedication to lifting were good indicators-- that seemed to have a well-balanced routine set up. Kihyun liked routines. They were neat. And the routine happened to include calling his mom, something else Kihyun liked. 

He treated his mother well which meant that he was likely respectful in general and cared for women. 

Wonho seemed driven to reach his goals, too. His ambition to be a physical therapist and help people was impressive. The way he carved out time for music, too.

And this is what Kihyun could tell about him only after a month of texting. 

Wonho, or at least the figment of imagination that was Wonho in his mind, had met standards that Kihyun didn’t even know he had.

. . .

Kihyun's mom is driving him back to school. He's got significantly less stuff to bring than he brought home, so that's nice. 

He wonders what he's going to do this semester. He doesn't want to run into Wonho. 

Maybe he doesn't look like his pictures. Maybe he really was a catfish. Kihyun didn't always look the same in his pictures as he did in real life. 

Yeah.

Okay.

They were in different majors. He never went around the science buildings. If he had to pass them, he could circumvent them by making a new route.

He didn't have to worry about Wonho on his social media-- everything was private. 

Okay. 

Yeah. 

Cool. 

He's in control of everything. 

No Wonho, no problem, right?

"I'm sorry things didn't work out with that boy."

"I don't want to talk about it, mom."

"Okay. Are you excited about the new semester?"

"I guess."

"I know you'll do well. You always do."

"Yeah."

Things are quiet and weird. He doesn't mind the not talking, it's less questions to answer for him, but he hates that he made his mom feel bad. 

But there's no way to bridge this gap. If he does, it'll only mean opening a can of worms that he doesn't want to open. 

When he gets to school, he gives her a big hug. 

"Bye mom."

"Bye sweetie. Are you sure you'll be okay?"

"Yeah. I'll be fine."

.

.

.

“Are you okay, sweetheart?” A head peaks into the room.

“I messed up, mom.” Wonho looks up from his phone. Radio silence from the one person he wants to contact drives him to insanity. Aside from work and occasionally assisting his mom, he doesn't do anything but lay in his bed. He’d even skipped a workout.

His mom walks into the room and speaks in her soft, comforting voice, “what happened?”

“It’s about Kihyun. . . the boy I was telling you about. . . And he kind of thinks I was only talking to him for money,” he chews his bottom lip nervously. 

“Oh, sweetie. I'm sure if you just explain to him that that isn't true-- it's not true, right?-- he'll come around.”

“He blocked my number. I don't have another way to contact him to explain.” 

“Don't you kids have all that social media now? Have you tried that?”

“We never actually exchanged social media and I can't find his profiles if he has them.”

“Well, cheer up. You can't sulk around all day anymore. You'll just have to meet him back at school and set things straight.”

“If I can find him at school,” he mumbles and sits up. 

“Come help me clean up. You’ll get your mind off of him for a while and be a big help to me.”

. . . 

"Wonho!" Jooheon flings himself onto Wonho and Wonho catches him. 

He laughs at the younger and looks into the apartment.

Changkyun waves nonchalantly, "hey."

"Hey Kyun. Shownu's not back yet?"

Wonho maneuvers himself and Jooheon inside without Jooheon releasing him. 

"He and Moonbyul just left to go grocery shopping. She's going to make dinner tonight for our reunion."

"Oh, that's nice of her."

"Isn't she the best? She's not even going to stay! She said she spent enough time with Shownu and that we should have a guys night."

Jooheon finally disentangles himself. 

"That's very nice of her. We should do something to thank her."

"What if we made Shownu wash his clothes more often?"

"Oh stop, he's already so clean!" Jooheon negates Changkyun. 

"Well, what if we just bake her something? Or buy her some skincare products or something? She likes sheet masks."

"That's a better idea," Jooheon agrees. 

The apartment is cluttered as they all move their things back in. Wonho dumps his stuff into his room to be dealt with later. 

"How was break?"

They all three catch up and are laughing about a video of Jooheon's cousin falling into a foot of snow when Shownu and Moonbyul come back. 

"Hi guys. I'm making you spicy tofu soup and rice."

"Sounds delicious."

"Mm, I'm starving for good food."

"Thank you, Moonbyul. Hey Shownu."

"Hi boys, how were your breaks? Did anyone challenge the institutions or oppression?" Moonbyul asks.

"No, but I had a lot of good naps," Jooheon answers. 

"I experienced racism and ate a lot of meat and potatoes."

"I worked the whole time and accidentally cleaned my kitchen counters with dish soap."

"Wonho, what?"

"Nevermind it."

Moonbyul blinks at them all, "okay then."

"How was your break?" Wonho returns the question.

Shownu sits in the chair next to him and pulls out his phone as a fire lights in her eyes. 

"I went to a march, and hung flyers, and educated young women and empowered them! And we're going vegetarian, so your meal is vegetarian too. I really feel like I'm bringing this country forward! I can't wait to start teaching and practicing greater political activism."

"Let me know next time you go to a march, I'd love to go."

"Sure thing, Changkyun! I would love to have you come along."

"I would, but I'll probably be working."

"I know, Wonho," she smiles gently. 

"Now, would anyone like a cooking lesson? Honey? Kyunnie?"

Wonho knows the offer doesn't apply to him. He's not allowed in the kitchen because he eats too much of the food. He could watch, but there's not really much of a point.

"I should be able to get your boy's number tomorrow."

"What?" Wonho asks, turning to look at Shownu.

He notices that their apartment is remarkably clean right now. It probably won't last. 

"Kihyun. I'll get his number tomorrow. If he's not in my music class, someone that knows his number is. So, how're you going to win him back?"

"Win him back?"

"I don't know what you did, but I know it's not about protein powder."

"When did you get so observant?"

Shownu looks up from his phone then looks past Wonho to the kitchen. 

Oh. 

So Moonbyul figured things out. 

_ She's definitely the brains in their relationship _ . 

“I’m not sure.”

. . .

"Wait, this is delicious," Jooheon says as he shovels a spoonful of rice into his mouth. 

"I told you it would be," Moonbyul says breezily. "Now eat up, I'll see you all later."

"Bye!" Choruses throughout the space along with "thanks for the meal."

The door shuts behind her. 

"I wouldn't mind dating someone if they treated me like this," Changkyun comments. 

"Nobody's gonna cook for you. You have no redeeming traits."

"Except my intelligence and stroke game."

Changkyun and Wonho bicker. Shownu shakes his head and Wonho stifles a laugh. 

"Buddy, we have to get you a doctor. There's no way your sex drive can be that high." Wonho takes another large bite after speaking.

"What are you implying?"

Shownu intercepts, "maybe you should spend a little less time hooking up with people and more time making sure you don't fail your electives."

Jooheon draws in a breath, "broooo he got you."

Wonho laughs at the way he says that too; it's reminiscent of high school. Jooheon is like a breath of fresh air.

"Shownu, are you excited for your last semester?" 

He shrugs, "I guess."

"Is your internship going to hire you full time after you graduate?"

He nods, "yeah."

"That's exciting."

Wonho knows that the older man isn't dumb. He knows that he is, in fact, quite intelligent, but when he starts talking about mathematical formulas and the things he knows about engineering, Wonho is struck by how smart he actually is.

"When do you start working at the hospital again, Wonho?"

"I'm scheduled again starting next week. How about you, Honey? When do you start student teaching?"

"I don't start for another week either. The kids aren't back in school yet."

"What about you, Changkyun?" Shownu asks.

"Did you find an internship?" Wonho follows up, but he knows it's not likely. Changkyun is still so young, only a freshman. Or maybe by credit hours he's a sophomore. Wonho doesn't know. He knows he's smart, though. The biochem major only has to read his materials once to pull A's and B's. 

"Nah. I'm still gonna be working at city hall in the records room."

That's another thing, Changkyun is all around smart, so it doesn't matter what he wants to do. He doesn’t seem to challenge himself in day to day life, though. That’s why he almost failed his electives the semester prior.

"I'm sure you'll be able to find something you like better by next year," Wonho consoles him. 

"Let's make it a good semester," Shownu says, holding his beer out for a toast. 

"I feel good things coming." At Jooheon's announcement, Wonho glances at him. "Be it in academics, the professional sphere, or love. A.K.A, Shownu please ask Moonbyul to hook me up with one of her friends."

Shownu sighs. 

Wonho chuckles before offering to clean the kitchen since the younger guys cooked and Shownu went to the store. 

Even if Jooheon was kidding, he hopes good things are coming. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I debated on combining this with Chapter 16, but ultimately decided to leave them separate. I'll post 16 tomorrow. :)


	16. Chapter 16

"Are you okay, Ki? You," Minhyuk hesitates for a moment, "don't look so good."

For Minhyuk to hesitate in teasing him, and for him to use that concerned voice, means he must really look rough. 

"Thanks," he responds dryly. At this moment, Kihyun wants nothing more than to wrap himself in blankets and read books until he forgets that he's about to start a new semester of continuously avoiding someone he's never met before. It's his own fault and he knows it, but he wants to be a little bit dramatic before school sucks up all of the time he has to be dramatic. 

"Wanna talk about it?"

Kihyun shakes his head and uses the filtered pitcher to refill his water bottle. 

"Okay, well I'll be here if you want to talk."

With a sigh, Kihyun returns the pitcher to the fridge and slinks back into his room. 

Minhyuk just shrugs and figures that Kihyun's either in a mood he'll snap out of, or never going to tell him what's going on until they're on their deathbeds. 

. . . 

From the safety of his bed, Kihyun can hear Mark Tuan in his living room. He and Minhyuk are speaking about something that happened over break and Kihyun's trying his hardest to ignore the urge he feels to go to the bathroom. 

He doesn’t have anything against Mark. 

Except he’s maybe a little jealous. Mark’s parents allowed him to move to Korea and pursue his own future. 

He’d probably never heard his parents tell him it didn’t matter how he did in school, so long as he passed, because he’d be taking over the restaurant. At least it gave 

Kihyun the freedom to pursue music while it lasted.

So-- really-- nothing against Mark, he just is not in the mood for any kind of company. In fact, he's not even in the mood for Minhyuk and they'd been the best of friends since high school. 

It's when he gets too hungry and almost pees his pants he decides to roll out of his blanket fortress and brave the common area of the apartment. 

He makes a pit stop at the hall bathroom before waving to Mark and Minhyuk as he trudges into the kitchen to cook himself something to eat. 

There's not much food since he decided to forego grocery shopping to lay in bed and be upset. Still, he finds enough to make himself a meal. 

"What're you making?"

He shrugs and points at the box, "this."

"Oh, cook it all. Mark and I were gonna order some food, so we can have like a whole meal with the noodles you're making."

"Sure." Kihyun's eyes don't meet Minhyuk's. Of course he wants him to cook for him and his friend. It's not like the youngest is actually invited to have dinner with them. 

Why does he even care? It's not like he wants to eat with them anyways. 

. . .

Minhyuk knocks on his door and opens it, stepping into the room. 

"I brought you some food since I figured you wouldn't want to eat with us."

Kihyun can hear him set it on the desk and retreat. He waits until Minhyuk is gone to flip over and look at the curry chicken.

His mind, which had been beautifully blank for the first time since last semester started, starts to swim with thoughts again. He can't believe he's this anxious and the semester hasn't even begun. The nice thing is, he has all his syllabi and knows most of the professors, so the semester shouldn't be as busy as the last. 

In his three years on campus, he’d never seen Wonho before so that would be fine. 

And he doesn’t have to go home to the constant reminder that the rest of his life is peaceful, safe, mediocre, and to be lived in Goyang until the semester ends.

Minhyuk is someone he’s grateful for, he reminds himself. A lesson in positivity suggests that he should list more positives, but for today, Minhyuk is enough.

Maybe if he eats and then goes back to distracting himself, he'll feel better in the morning. 

The food certainly smells appetizing and if he gets to eat it from the warmth of his bed, then why not? 

So he eats and then cleans up his bowl and gets ready for a long night of sleep.

There’ll be no more mess when he wakes up. 

He won’t allow enough time for it.

.

.

.

“Hey,” Shownu says when Wonho picks up the phone. “Wake up.”

“I'm up,” Wonho groans as he adjusts his eyes to the light in the room by blinking. He sits up and tugs at his shirt and fluffs his hair while Shownu speaks.

“So I asked around and I found your boy. He doesn't have social media that I know of.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah. Here.” He sets a piece of paper on the edge of Wonho’s bed. 

He raises an eye at it and supposes that Shownu’s phone was dead when he was getting the number. Otherwise, why would he need to piece of paper?

“What’s really going on?”

“I messed up. I just need to talk to him.”

“So he was that boy from the beginning of break? The one that made you that lunch box?”

Wonho nods solemnly, “Moonbyul and you figured that much out, huh?”

“So you’re going to what?”

“Explain myself. I don’t know how yet. Maybe like do something big for him? Or I could just text him?”

“Okay. Well let me know what you decide to do. I can ask Moonbyul if you need help. Girls are good at that kind of thing.”

“For other girls,” Wonho points out, “which Kihyun is not.”

“Right,” Shownu says. “Well, the offer stands, I guess.”

“Thanks.” 

Shownu salutes him and then exits the room. He probably is going to eat. Wonho looks at the clock and sees he’s right. Shownu eats his meals on a strict schedule. Wonho questions the validity of that as a diet tip, but realizes it doesn’t hurt anything.

. . .

The apartment is quiet in the late morning as he wakes up. Shownu’s in the shower. The others must be out at class.

He exits his room with the intent of making a protein-filled smoothie and stops short at the sight of Shownu’s girlfriend sitting at their kitchen table.

“Moonbyul,” Wonho smiles charmingly. 

“Oh God,” she teases. “What do you want now? Food?”

“No-- well, yes, but later-- I want to know how I should apologize to Kihyun?”

She puts her pen down on her notebook and gives Wonho her full attention.

“Wait-- is that  _ the boy _ Kihyun?”

“Yeah. Him.”

Her eyes sparkle at the prospect of finally finding out what happened between the two.

“Well first, you’ll have to tell me what happened.”

“Well, it’s kind of a long story.” Wonho scratches at the back of his neck. 

“I’ve got time.”

He takes a seat and flips up the straw to his water bottle, ready to start planning with Kihyun’s phone number and music room number.

. . .

“I hope this will work. I think he’s gonna hate it.”

“Well, as long as it gets him to talk to you.”

“If you’re sure. He’ll probably only curse me out.”

“Just texting him is not good enough. He’ll ghost you and then trying to talk to him after that will just be desperate.”

Moonbyul steps out of Kihyun’s studio and pulls Wonho along with her. She locks the door and returns the key to her friend. 

“Thanks, Minju. I’ll set you up with Jooheon.”

“He’s the cute one, right?” She blinks, looking up from her papers. “Oops, hello.”

“This is Wonho. And yes, Jooheon is very cute.”

Wonho nods. 

“So, you’re Kihyun’s boyfriend?”

“Uh, yeah,” Wonho answers. He doesn’t chance a glance at Moonbyul to see if that’s the right answer. 

“I hope he likes his surprise. If he doesn’t, he’ll kill me for letting you in.” She wrings her hands nervously and Wonho wonders what he’s gotten himself into. 

Everyone that he’s asked about Kihyun so far seems to find him cold, stand offish, and mean. 

“We won’t tell him it was you,” Moonbyul reassures her. 

When they walk back to the apartment, Moonbyul questions him about it. 

“Are you sure this is the guy you want to pursue? I mean, not to judge, but,” she pauses, “people seem to think he’s, I dunno, a dick. Are you sure you know him that well?”

“Yeah... I think he’s just one of those people you have to get to know. He was nothing but nice to me. He even made me a lunch box once.”

“I’ll trust your judgement, then.” 

Matthew waves at him from a distance and they greet one another. Wonho promises to go to the gym with him sometime. 

Moonbyul stops to chat with her sorority sister, but given how the sky is about to get dark, he waits for her.

He passes by a group of guys from his Korean lit class and daps them up, pausing to ruffle Yoonho’s hair before continuing with Moonbyul to the apartment.

It takes the two of them a lot longer than normal to reach their destination based on their popularity levels, but it’s okay. 

It’s the start of the semester, and that’s just who they are.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: in the drafts, this chapter is labelled 'some suffer' so I know where to find it


	17. Chapter 17

Kihyun walks into his assigned practice room, ready to start on the upcoming semesters work.

Until he sees the room, that is. 

He doesn't know who's gotten into the room, but whoever it was has made a complete mess of his room. There are post it notes everywhere, a flurry of blue and yellow slips of paper with a few pink ones sprinkled in. 

"What the heck is this," he whispers, flustered. He picks up his phone, fingers shaking because he's mad. No, he's furious. There are so many post it notes, it's going to take him hours to clean them all. And who put them here? Probably Minhyuk. He could've taken his key without him noticing and orchestrated this. He thought they moved past large scale pranks like this in high school. What really pisses him off is that Minhyuk knows that this room is his space. 

He dials Minhyuk and waits for his roommate to pick up. 

"Why the  _ fuck _ did you do this?" He seethes. 

"Whoa, do what?"

"My practice room!"

"I didn't do anything to your practice room. That's  _ your _ space, Ki."

Kihyun breathes. 

“I-- sorry.”

"Do you need me to come down there?"

Kihyun feels his anger break, "please." He almost whimpers. 

All he wants to do is work on his music, write his feelings out, play his keyboard. He can't do any of that now. Probably won't be able to for the next few hours. He's the kind of person that likes order, so he'll have to pull all of the post it notes down-- each and every one. 

He starts pulling them off his chair and by the time he's working on the legs, Minhyuk is there. 

"Oh my God," Minhyuk breathes before covering his mouth to stop from laughing. He bets Kihyun is upset. He usually is after coming back to school. 

Something about leaving his family again after being annoyed by them for however long he's been home always gets his friend worked up.

If past experience wasn't enough to tell him, the radio silence since coming back to school only being broken by Kihyun's call was enough.

And if that wasn’t enough, the one space that was his and only his on campus had been compromised in one of the cleanest messes Minhyuk could imagine. At least there wasn’t a ton of dirt to drive Kihyun into a frenzy.

"Come on, let's get this cleaned up," Minhyuk says and pats Kihyun's shoulder. He starts pulling them off the wall where he can reach. "You okay?"

"I just wanted to work on my music but instead I'm super stressed now."

"Well, we'll figure out who did it."

"I thought you did it--"

"I know you did."

"Because you could have grabbed my key. But I don't know who else could have."

"Would the school have given anyone the key?"

"Only the person who has the room next door."

"Who is that?"

"I don't know. I don't exactly come here to socialize."

"They have to be a music student right?"

Kihyun nods, turning the chair up right and taking the first few papers off his keyboard. 

"Yeah. . . It would've been easy for anyone to fake like they lost their key over break though."

"The person wouldn't even have to show ID or anything?"

"Not if they called when the rentacops were on duty."

"Fuckin' rentacops," Minhyuk commiserates, thinking back on all the times they let other kids slide but punished him for forgetting his student ID. "Pause," Minhyuk says, turning to Kihyun with a pink post it in his hand. Kihyun looks at him, about to encourage him to keep pulling the sticky notes down. "This one has your name on it. So they definitely know it's your room."

Minhyuk gently takes the post it note and reads his name on it. 

"More words! I think all the pink ones have words. See that one said 'Kihyun', this one says 'I'm' 'so' 'sorry' 'can' 'we' 'please' 'talk' 'things' 'out' question mark 'Wonho'. Who's Wonho?" Minhyuk pauses as he has to move to pull each sticky note then reads them all to Kihyun before asking the question. 

"He's a guy I was. . . talking to, over break. I cut things off because we wanted different things."

Minhyuk really wants to tease Kihyun. Joke about sexual preferences and how much of a vanilla prude Kihyun is, but he knows better. Now is not the time. Not when his poor little Ki is so stressed out.

“The sugar daddy?” Kihyun answers with a nod even though that's the opposite of what Wonho is and Minhyuk continues. "Well, what are you gonna do? Talk to him?" Minhyuk recalls how Kihyun had smiled when talking to the man, like, a month ago. He wanted his friend to smile like that again, but probably not from the same guy who almost made him cry. 

"I don't know. I don't even have his number anymore, so if I wanted to it's not like I could."

"His number is on this last post it."

Kihyun snatches the pink paper from his hands and whips his phone out. 

His fingers dance across the screen and before he knows it, the ringing is in his ear. 

No one answers, so he listens to the voice mailbox recording. Wonho's voice is maybe not exactly how he imagined it. 

"You've reached Wonho. I can't come to the phone right now so leave me a message and I'll call you right back."

The moment he hears the beep he starts talking. He starts off sweet, but Minhyuk flinches at the sheer anger in his tone mid message. 

"Hi Wonho, this is Kihyun. I'm super touched by the effort you went through, but if you don't get your ass down here to clean this mess up, I'll finger flick your forehead so hard you'll get a concussion and that's a promise." He hangs up. 

"Well that's one way to address the issue."

"Was I too harsh?"

"Oh no, I'm sure he's gonna come running for that."

"I could do without all the sarcasm, Minhyukie."

“I wonder how much of that he understood. Your lisp gets stronger when you get worked up.”

“Shut up.”

“You know I love you, Ki. Just trying to distract you.”

“By making fun of me?”

“That’s what we do. We roast each other and then make dinner together.”

“You mean you crowd the kitchen while I cook?”

“No, I stand by to help you prep the food when you ask.”

Kihyun does kind of feel better after they banter. At least his mind is on other things and some of the petty he'd been holding in spills out in a way that won't end in him having to apologize later.

A few more minutes pass with them bickering when they hear heavy footsteps and a bulky figure stops in front of the door. 

Wonho arrives to Kihyun's space, out of breath and slightly sweaty. Kihyun blinks. He can't believe the guy is real and that he didn't call or text to say he was coming.

"Sorry. Please don't give me a concussion."

"You're the one that almost made my baby cry?" Minhyuk narrows his eyes at Wonho. Kihyun doesn't think he's ever seen his friend look so intimidating.

Kihyun falters.

"Um, this is my best friend and roommate, Minhyuk."

"Hey, Minhyuk. I'm Wonho. Sorry for everything." Minhyuk shoots him a look before turning around to continue pulling down post it notes from where he's perched on the chair.

"Just get in here and start pulling down post it notes." Kihyun rolls his eyes.

"You didn't like it?"

"I almost cried in the worst kind of way. Please don't ever do something like this again."

"Hopefully I won't ever have to apologize to you again."

"For both our sake's, I hope not."

"Can I explain?"

"I-- yes."

"I skipped reading the instructions. I thought it was real. All along."

Wonho casts his glance to Minhyuk nervously before continuing on. There’s no use hiding what he has to say from the best friend. 

"I wanted to make some money. My friend Jooheon told me if I signed up for Instant Soulmate, I could make a few dollars by talking to people so I figured I'd try it. I thought I'd try the site for real, too. But I didn't pay enough attention and for that, I'm sorry."

"It was just a miscommunication," Kihyun placates before thinking about it. He has some right to be angry, but not really. And isn’t this good news? 

"You didn't want to actually date someone." Wonho is nervous to speak the words out into the office. Slowly, he pulls down the next few post its. Everything feels like it’s in slow motion as he waits for an answer.

Kihyun's hand falters as he reaches for another post-it. 

"No. I didn't think I did."

"You didn't think so?" Minhyuk snorts. Kihyun glares at him. "Sorry, forget I'm here."

Kihyun kind of had, more focused on stripping post its from his wall and listening to Wonho. 

"Maybe we should have this talk when my roommate isn't here."

"Maybe. . . Minhyuk you can go, I'll clean this up. It was my mess in the first place." Wonho pauses. “And Kihyun I’ll clean it so you don’t have to.”

“I’ll stay. I still want to do some work before I go home.”

Minhyuk shrugs, "be home by ten, Ki, or I'm calling campus police."

He checks Wonho's shoulder on the way out, despite being significantly smaller than him. 

Kihyun wonders to what extent his friend is protective of him. Clearly he cares enough to threaten a guy that has more muscles than both of them combined. 

Oddly, he feels kind of proud of Minhyuk-- or maybe their friendship. 

It’s quiet for a minute.

"He doesn't like me."

"He's mad because I was upset. He'll get over it. I'll make him some sweet potato and he'll be fine."

"Would you make me ramen?"

Kihyun chuckles, although it's somewhat spiteful. 

"Shouldn't we talk things out some more?"

"Well, yeah... So, you really don't want to date someone?"

"I didn't. I don't know now. I figured if I could get some screenshots to show my parents the ten bucks would be worth it."

The air stagnates between them as Wonho pauses to contemplate. "I still don't understand what you want."

“I don’t know. I feel like an idiot. I paid you to act like you liked me and then caught feelings.”

“It wasn’t acting. I really did--do-- enjoy talking to you.”

“But weren’t you talking to a bunch of other people?” He doesn’t want to hear the response, but he kind of needs to. He doesn’t watch Wonho answer, though, instead turns his attention to the post its once more. 

“No. There were one or two people but they only lasted a few days at max.”

It's not. . . It's not the end of the world. If he had been using the app to actually date someone, he probably would have talked to other people as well.

"So where do we go from here?" Kihyun chews his bottom lip as he waits for Wonho’s answer. He feels a hand on his shoulder and gently turns to face Wonho. 

"I want to get to know you better. Let's hang out. Maybe we can date, if that's something we decide we both want."

Wonho seems mature and Kihyun likes it. His face is earnest.

Kihyun stays silent to see if Wonho will say anything else. Plus, he has to work up some confidence on his own. Getting out of his own head, especially after fretting over Wonho for so many days, is going to take at least the next two minutes.

“I like you, Kihyun. Talking to you used to be the best part of my day. I want that back. No, I want more than that. I want snapchats and memes and whatever else you want to send me. No payments involved. I’m sorry if I made you feel like I was only talking to you for money. Will you let me take you out to make up for it? Please?"

Kihyun wants to be mad. He wants to make things more difficult for Wonho. It's a prime time to set an example on how he won't be mistreated and then apologized to.

But he's just as at fault and he knows it.

If he had expressly told Wonho what he wanted out of the fake relationship--

How many times he could have brought up his insecurities about the whole thing--

All the chances he had to tell Wonho that he really did end up liking him--

But he hadn’t. He’d waited and bottled everything up until it had burst.

So, yeah. He’s also in the wrong. 

"You don't have anything to make up for. It's my fault too. I could have communicated things to you better."

Wonho smiles gently and Kihyun bites his lip. The younger is still nervous, but the older is relieved that he at least gets another shot.

"I have Saturday night off. If you're available, we can do hang out and do whatever you like."

_ That sounds like a good idea _ , Kihyun thinks.

And god, does he miss Wonho. So he caves and doesn’t make things more difficult than they need to be. 

Wonho waits with baited breath, hopeful that Kihyun will agree to hang out with him. Go on a date. Whatever it ends up being. 

"I can do Saturday." Wonho breaks into a glorious grin. "But I need to stop by the coffee shop where I work to get my schedule."

"That's fine. Do you think the park still has Christmas lights up? We could walk there, it's really pretty."

"Don't they usually leave them up until mid- January? So I think they're probably still up."

"Okay. So I'll pick you up from your dorm and then we can head down there."

"Sure. The trams run all night so we can get dropped off at South Station then it's only a few blocks of walking."

"You sure you wanna take the tram? I don't mind walking."

Kihyun shakes his head no.

"It'll be too cold to walk the whole way there. We won't want to walk in the park if we do that."

"Fair."

"You don't like the tram?"

"It's fine. One time I went on it and there was a fire so I never really got back on it."

Wonho recalls the time with a shudder. There had been lots of running and then he'd had to pay for a cab home. 

"It caught on fire?" Kihyun takes the fearful nod he gives as proof that Wonho is, indeed, a chicken.

"Well, the fire alarm went off so we all had to evacuate."

"Oh, I see. Well, I take it every weekend. It'll be fine. Promise."

"I believe you."

A comfortable silence settles over them. 

"Damn, I didn't realize how many of these we put up."

"Your friends helped you?" Kihyun hums for the sake of making conversation. 

"Oh, yeah."

"Speaking of, how did you even get in here?"

"Oh, my friend knows who has access to the keys. It took a lot of convincing and I told her you were my boyfriend and it was our anniversary. She almost didn't let me in here."

Kihyun snorts, "probably because they think I'm a square who could never get a boyfriend."

"She thought you were straight. And was nervous that you would kill her for letting me in here."

"Well, I don't like people coming in here, so she got that right. This is my space on campus, I don't like sharing it." Kihyun wrinkles his nose at the thought. 

"Sorry."

"I forgive you. This time."

Kihyun switches to a new area of notes to be plucked off the wall. 

“Do you have Instagram?”

“I don’t use Instagram. I think the one I made in tenth grade is still up, though.”

“Do you use any social media?” Wonho asks conversationally. 

Kihyun bites his lip and debates on whether or not he should tell him about his Twitter. That’s his safe space to retweet animal pictures, political commentary, and LGBT+ advocacy.

“Um, yeah. Twitter.”

“Would you let me follow you?” Wonho feels like he should ask. His mother did raise him to be polite and respectful, after all.

“Oh. Yeah. I would.”

Wonho grins, but Kihyun doesn’t see it as he finished de-cluttering the desk.

“So, what kind of memes do you like?”


	18. Chapter 18

Minhyuk jumps up when Kihyun opens the apartment door and rushes to the younger.

"So, what happened after I left?"

"We talked things out," Kihyun sighs tiredly, letting his book bag drop from around his shoulders.

"And? What was the consensus? Where do you two go from here?" He speaks excitedly. 

Where do they go from here?

Kihyun really doesn't know how things will turn out. 

"I think we decided to hang out. And then maybe give dating a shot."

Minhyuk steps aside so Kihyun can throw his backpack onto the couch. He purses his lips in thought, "I think I'm happy for you, but I'm not happy with him. What kind of idiot-- you know what? It doesn't matter. Just so long as he doesn't fuck up again so soon. I'll beat his ass."

"Minnie, I love you, but you do recognize the fact that he is a mammoth of a man? Like he could crush my skull with his--"

"If you say thighs so help me God--"

"Biceps. Like a choke hold." Kihyun finishes his sentence decisively, leaving no more room for Minhyuk to talk.

"Oh. Yeah. I know that. But have you ever seen a momma bear protect her cubs?" Minhyuk's eyes narrow critically and Kihyun sees nothing but pure, cold fire rage in them. 

He almost shudders, but he knows it isn't directed at him. He's the cub in this situation, not the threat.

"I appreciate you," he offers as a consolation. Their roles have switched. Kihyun hurries down the hallway into his bedroom, eager to make his escape and to get ready for bed.

Minhyuk calls after him, “you better, Yoo Kihyun."

. . . 

Kihyun works on tidying the register after a rush of customers. Hyungwon leans against the counter behind him and surveys the cafe.

"So, tell me what's up."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean I updated you over break about how life in Gwangju was going, but you never told me anything. So spill."

"Not a whole lot happened," Kihyun lies through tight lips. 

Hyungwon frowns, "you're a shit liar. Just tell me."

"No."

"Was it a boy?" 

Hyungwon, though physically willowy and largely uninterested in other people's lives, is quite persistent when he wants information out of Kihyun. He uses his height to intimidate Kihyun and occasionally traps him in corners-- intentionally or otherwise, he doesn't know. The hunt for information becomes a priority; once the younger has something in his sights, it’s game over.

And Kihyun, well, Kihyun is just the poor fool that’s caught in his scope, unable to save himself. Or, in his case, lie to save his ass. 

"So it was a boy. Tell me about him. I have a ton of experience and I'm here to help decode whatever the situation is."

"I paid him to fake date me and he thought it was real because he didn't know how to use the app and I caught feelings so I blew up and then he apologized to me when I got back to campus."

"Woah, woah, woah. Hold up. Let's take a second. You paid someone to fake date you? Who? Do you know this guy?" Hyungwon straightens up and peers to look at Kihyun. The older busies himself with organizing the cash drawer so everything is neater.

"No, I used an app."

There's no use in trying to keep quiet now. He went and exposed himself.

"Oh God, Kihyun." Hyungwon leans back onto the counter and presses his hand dramatically to his forehead. His face is all screwed up and the shorter of the two kind of wants to hit him for his dramatics. While these characteristics of his are good for storytelling, they're bad when he's on the receiving end of an interrogation. "So you never met him?"

"Not until I came back."

"Was he a catfish and can I see his picture?” Hyungwon asks in succession, uncovering his face. Kihyun nervously twists the cubic zirconia stud in his ear. “Maybe I know him."

Yeah, Kihyun doesn't doubt there's a possibility, but against his better judgement, he finds Wonho's contact picture and hands the phone to Hyungwon.

He just hopes that Wonho isn’t one of Hyungwon’s hook ups. He doesn’t think any of them would be his type after having heard from the taller, in great detail, what all of his trysts were like.

"Oh. Oh, okay, Kihyun. I see you. He's hot as fuck. I didn't know big was your type. I could've set you up with Minhyuk."

"That senior? No thanks. I only need one Minhyuk in my life."

"I never did meet your roommate. Anyways, was he a catfish or is he really that hot?" Kihyun knows the first few words are a jab at him for never hanging out with the taller, but he ignores them.

"He's really that hot."

"Lucky. So, where were we? You two had a misunderstanding, but he apologized?"

"We talked things out."

"And?"

"Decided to hang out and then maybe date."

Kihyun closes the drawer and turns to look at Hyungwon for a minute before finding something else to busy himself with. 

Hyungwon smiles, "I'm so happy for you. I feel like a mother hen--"

"What is up with you and Minhyuk thinking you're my mothers?" He scoffs. 

"I practically raised you in terms of dating."

"By scarring me with your own horror stories? Mr. Farmer's-Only?"

"That was one time. Besides, it wasn't as bad as the Christian Mingle date."

Kihyun shudders in recollection. 

"Well we're just hanging out so I don't know--"

"He totally wants to date you. I mean, look at you. You're cute as heck. Besides, he wouldn't have apologized and asked to hang out if he wasn't interested."

Kihyun stops to really consider what Hyungwon's saying. He has a valid point. 

"So, do you like him too?"

"Yeah. I really think I do."

"Think or know?"

The fact that he knows scares him. 

.

.

.

"So, how did that thing with Kihyun go?" Shownu asks when Wonho enters their room late at night. 

He jumps, startled by the older who is somehow still awake. Usually Shownu falls asleep early-- he really is the grandpa of the group. It doesn’t help that Moonbyul likes him to get up early and go to the gym with her, because he, of course, obliges. Even though they don’t stay together in the gym. But whatever. It’s probably better than going at two in the morning, which is his habit.

"Um, good." He realizes that they haven't had a chance to talk about it, even if he did thank Moonbyul again. "We're hanging out on Saturday."

"Moonbyul's been worried about you. I told her you were a big boy and could handle yourself."

"I appreciate her concern."

He strips his outer layers and disappears to clean his teeth. 

Once he's done, he climbs into his bed with his laptop to read a pdf for class. Having an assigned reading of this length this early in the semester seems ridiculous, but no one ever said college would be easy. 

“Wonho.”

At the call of his name, he glances up at Shownu to see what he wants. Usually it’s something like ‘don’t stay up too late’ or ‘can you toss me a floss pick?’

This time, it isn’t.

"So where are you gonna take him on your 'hang out'?"

The start up screen shows on his computer. 

"I'm not sure yet. We talked about going to karaoke, but I think it would be more fun with a group so that seems like a later thing."

Shownu pauses and whether or not the words register doesn’t really show on his face.

"What about dinner?" Shownu suggests. It seems unlikely that he would be this helpful, so Wonho surmises that Moonbyul has really been worried about him. He remembers the time when Shownu still thought going to the movies was a good first date. 

"I don't know if I can afford to take him somewhere nice right now and he seems a little picky. Like, his parents own a ramen shop so I can't take him to any of my favorite places."

"Everybody has to eat."

"Yeah. You're right. We talked about going to look at the lights in the park down South side. Maybe we can get snacks from some of those street stalls if they're still open."

"They have those quick stop in and eat kind of places down on Maple Street too."

"Solid idea, bro. I think I know where to take him now."

"Let us know how it goes."

Wonho stares at him, "she's not even here right now."

He turns his head and gestures to a BlueTooth headset. The kind he hasn't seen in years. 

The thought buffers and then-- he jumps and starts laughing. Once he gets himself under control, he starts talking normal again, ignoring the way his heart beats faster in embarrassment.

"Oh. Hey Moonbyul. Thanks for your help."

Shownu nods, "she said you're welcome."

That makes so much more sense. 

Wonho sets to work as they talk quietly. He assumes Moonbyul is doing most of the talking because Shownu has always been quiet and even when on the phone he doesn't respond often. 

When they hang up, he pauses his reading to request that Shownu "never do that again because it scared the mess out of [him]."

Shownu just chuckles. 

. . . 

With his shifts at the hospital not starting for the next few days, Wonho suddenly finds he has too much time on his hands. 

He cleans some things around the apartment (carefully choosing the correct kind of cleaning supplies this time around) and goes shopping for some better foods. 

Changkyun is also home in the day which is kind of weird. The two of them don't spend a lot of time together. 

"Bro, do you want to play video games or something?" Wonho asks. 

Changkyun blinks at him, eyebrow raised as his wire frame glasses slide down his nose.

"You hate video games."

"Yeah, but you like them and this is probably the last time we'll have to hang out this semester."

"You say that like you're planning to die."

"You know what I mean." Wonho rolls his eyes. 

"Sure. Let's play. Do you remember the controls?"

Wonho shrugs as Changkyun hands him a controller. 

The plastic in his hands feels pretty light, but the last time he played a game was probably two generations of console ago. This controller doesn't even have a cord.

"What game do you want to play?"

"You can pick."

It's Changkyun's turn to shrug, so he settles for Call of Duty because he knows Wonho played that game in high school. Explaining stuff for Fortnite would take too long. 

"So, how was going back to America?"

The tone of Changkyun's voice stays disinterested and flat, "fine. My step mom was home the whole time with me."

Wonho knows it's a defense mechanism. Changkyun has never liked his step mom, especially when she was persuading his father to move back to the US. 

It must be hard to have separated parents, but to have his dad so far away must be worse.

At least Wonho's dad has always been a piece of shit. He's hard to miss. 

"Sorry to hear that. Did you get to spend any time with your dad?"

"Yeah. He had a few days off of work and we got some drinks."

"They let you drink there? Isn't the drinking age like twenty-five?"

"It's twenty-one, but he has a bar in his basement."

"Oh. That's cool, I guess."

The serious conversation dies off as they start to play the game. They start joking about their mutual friends, bad-mouthing their teammates in the game, and updating one another on their classes.

It seems to be a good time.

. . .

Once again, Wonho is bored. He has far too much time on his hands since he’s not working and his coursework hasn’t picked up yet. He tries to get ahead on readings, but he knows he’ll forget most of the information within the next few weeks, despite his best attempts at note-taking, so it feels futile. Like trying to put sand through a sieve and keep the sand in until a later time.

With nothing better to do, he decides to check up on some people. He wants to text Kihyun, but he also doesn’t want to crowd the younger now that they have a set date.

**Wonho**

What ever happened with those two guys at the gym?

The day you ditched me

**Seungcheol**

Those to guys? 

Not interested

One of them gave me a bible tho

**Wonho**

Why am I not surprised?

**Seungcheol**

😭😭

I just want love

**Wonho**

Don't we all

**Seungcheol**

Shut up

How's lover boy?

**Wonho**

He’s good

**Seungcheol**

Wtf

How come everybody loves you

**Wonho**

Have u looked at me

**Seungcheol**

Bro

**Wonho**

Lmoa I’m jk

You just have to wait

**Seungcheol**

I s2g


	19. Chapter 19

"So, what's the plan here?"

“I considered taking you to a karaoke place,” Wonho muses. “But I think that would be more fun with friends, so we’ll save that for later. We're going to your workplace first, as per your request. Then we'll head to the park and walk around and look at the lights around the city. Then we'll warm up by getting ramen or something along those lines. I figured you'd want to pick something, and I'll eat anything you put in front of me. Then I'll take you home."

"I guess that sounds good." Kihyun doesn't know why he is so reluctant to go out with Wonho. He had really liked him before and he still did. It was probably just nerves. He was signing on to spend at least two hours with someone he'd never met before. As a fairly introverted person, the plan for the night ahead seemed daunting. 

"Is there something you don't want to do?"

"Um, no. It all sounds good. Sorry, I don't mean to seem unenthused."

"Okay. Let me know if you change your mind. I want you to have fun too."

"Yeah. Yeah, okay." The way Wonho insists that Kihyun communicates and his flexibility and willing to adapt to make Kihyun more comfortable don't go unappreciated. He hadn't necessarily thought Wonho would be a jerk, but he was also definitely nicer than expected.

Somewhere, deep down, Kihyun is afraid that maybe, just maybe, this is all an act. Something Wonho does to win his trust before he scams him out of money.

Wonho had never been like that though. He was a hard worker that hated asking for money, so Kihyun should know better than to suspect that of him.

It's stupid and he knows it, so he listens to Minhyuk's words of advice. 

_ Just go have fun. It doesn't have to work out, but if you don't get out of your own head, it definitely won't work. So just enjoy the night _ .

That had come from Minhyuk, who saw him off like a mother bird even though he hated Wonho based on his first impression. 

He was totally right. Overanalyzing was going to kill the mood.

So he shakes his head and remembers all the qualities Wonho possesses that he does like. He's had a month or so to get to know the older, and he liked virtual Wonho. He would probably like real-life Wonho too if he could just get out of his head. 

"Is it cool if we hold hands?" Wonho asks. "No pressure, though."

Kihyun supposes it wouldn't hurt. They both have gloves on because of the cold, but it would still be nice to feel like Wonho was his real boyfriend. It's a weird gray area and Kihyun feels like it's only gray on his side. 

He reaches out his hand and links their hands together. 

The warm green glow of a neon light lights the path as they continue walking to the Espresso Lane.

“How were your classes this week?”

“They were pretty easy,” Kihyun hums. “How were yours?”

“Already getting difficult,” he chuckles. “I don’t know why I chose to be a STEM major.”

“Because you like it.”

“You’re right.” Wonho’s smile soothes the burning shame Kihyun feels in his chest for answering a rhetorical question. He’s nervous so he jumped the gun. 

“Are you in any electives or all major-courses?”

“I have to take some electives still. Fine arts and that.”

Kihyun nods, “I finished mine, but I’m good on music credits so I signed up for English lessons.”

“That’s cool.”

.

.

.

The foggy area he's in with Kihyun is starting to clear-- metaphorically that is. The chilled winter air of the night is crisp. Wrapped in winter clothes and holding hands with Kihyun, he feels warm. 

The cafe they approach and disappear into is homey. It smells like rich coffee and strongly brewed tea. The walls are a rich wood, shiny with shellac. The vintage lightbulbs in all of the fixtures create a warm glow over everything. Different patterned and styles of tea cups and some black piping fixtures reminiscent of steam punk adorn the walls. The tables and chairs look broken in, like people have always sat in them and lived their lives. 

Kihyun works here. 

He spends his days in the black t-shirts and red aprons that the two employees currently behind the counter wear. 

He vaguely recognizes one of the guys as Jooheon's friend, but the other also looks familiar in a way. They must go to the university too. 

"Yo Kihyun. How goes it?"

"Hey Mark. Hey Jackson. I just came to get my schedule."

"And you brought a friend," Jackson comments, smiling brightly at Wonho. 

"Yeah, this is my date Wonho."

Wonho is pleasantly surprised that Kihyun introduced him as such. He didn't think he would.

"Hi, nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too! I'm Jackson and this is Mark," the chestnut brown-haired man says. He gestures to his co-worker who has black hair and is roughly the same height but looks tiny. Kihyun lets go of his hand to make his way to the back.

"Can I get my regular? And Wonho, get what you want."

"It's on the house," Mark informs him and Jackson winks.

Wonho looks at the board of drinks and is taken aback by the names of the drinks.

"I think it'll take me too long to find one from that list," he chuckles. "Can I have an Americano?"

"Alright, Mark. Get in the cup, por favor."

Mark rolls his eyes and walks away. Wonho wonders if Mark's barely noticeable accent is American and he's missing a language joke.

Jackson gets a cup of tea made for Kihyun, not needing to leave the front counter.

Wonho scrutinizes the baked goods in the glass case.

"Do you want one?" Jackson offers.

"Oh, no thanks. I just wanted to see what they all were."

"If you're sure. Hey, you look kind of familiar. You go to school with Ki?"

He nods, "yeah. I think I might have seen you on campus, or you might know Jooheon."

"Jooheon?" Jackson almost drops Ki's cup. He gets excited and oddly resembles a puppy. "I love him! He's such a great friend."

"He is. We live together."

Wonho really likes Jackson's positive demeanor and bright energy. 

Mark comes back with a to-go cup for Wonho and he accepts it. It'll keep his hand nice and toasty-- Kihyun's hand will warm the other one.

The younger emerges from the back.

"Thanks guys."

Kihyun accepts his tea for Jackson and they chat for a few more minutes until another customer enters the shop and they take that as their cue to leave. 

The walk to the park is short and Wonho asks Kihyun about the specifics of his classes this semester and if he's excited. Kihyun tells him he's not all that excited, but he'll have more time this semester to work on his music. The younger asks him more about his semester and his work schedule. 

Wonho wonders why Kihyun asks about his schedule, but it feels nice. He doesn’t want to read too far into things. Kihyun's good at remembering things, so he answers honestly and briefly.

The two arrive at the park and sit on a bench, watching the lights in the park and other people walk past them. Several other couples are out with their arms around one another, sitting on benches. Wonho doesn't want to push his luck. 

A group of young people go by and he can tell they're looking for a party or bar to go to. They don't stop to ask him questions. 

"That guy definitely works in an office and goes home to a wife and two kids."

"What makes you say that?"

Kihyun shrugs, "nothing. I just like to make up stories for people."

"I want to try." Wonho's eyes scan the park. He sees two young women several benches away and averts his eyes before he gets caught staring. "Those girls over there are on a date, but they don't want everyone else to know."

Kihyun nods, "I see it."

The two have fun pointing people out and making up stories about their lives. The more comfortable they get around each other, the more creative the stories get. 

"Oh, hey. This guy here? His name is Kyungmo. He works out three times a week, never eats breakfast, and drives a scooter, but he works at a fancy law firm. His wife left him, so now he just lives with his dog."

"Sad existence. Oh, this dude is deadass the best dancer around. He studied ballroom for years and teaches it to people about to get married."

Kihyun giggles and it’s one of the cutest sounds Wonho’s ever heard. Content fills him.

Once they run out of their drinks, they decide it's time to go for a snack. 

Wonho takes Kihyun to his favorite barbecue place in town. 

They order, Wonho getting more than Kihyun, and start to talk about their friends. 

Wonho likes when Kihyun laughs as he talks about the shenanigans that he and Minhyuk have experienced. 

Kihyun listens avidly as Wonho tells him about things that he and his flatmates did back in the day. 

"One time, Jooheon ran over Changkyun's foot."

"With a car?"

"Yeah, when he was learning how to drive. Kyun faked like his foot was broken for a month and made me carry him around. Jooheon still won't let Changkyun near a car if it’s on and they're going to drive somewhere."

There's a lot of laughter and it's pleasant.

Wonho knows this is something he wants to do again, he just hopes Kihyun feels the same way.

. . .

Kihyun stops in front of a tall building about ten minutes away from his. 

“Well, this is me.”

Wonho glances up and wonders briefly what floor he lives on. 

“I had a lot of fun tonight,” he tells the shorter honestly. “I hope you did too, Cutie.”

The flush on Kihyun’s cheeks intensifies as Wonho leans in a little bit. 

“I did.”

“Does this mean I can take you on another one?”

“Yes.”

Wonho is elated, but he tries his best to play it cool. Only the grin he can’t contain splits across his face and he can’t help but to lean in and kiss Kihyun’s cheek. 

“Night, Kihyun. I’ll see you in my dreams.”

Was that laying it on too thick? The blush on Kihyun’s cheeks is fiercer than ever. 

“Good night, Wonho.”

Wonho takes a few steps backwards and waves with a smile while Kihyun does the same before approaching the apartment door with his keycard. 

_ Score _ .


	20. Chapter 20

"I'm so jealous of his arm muscles. Did you purposefully bring him by so that I would feel bad about myself?"

Kihyun's mid-shift with Jackson today. He's both glad and upset that Hyungwon has a dentist appointment. It's nice to work with someone else for a change, but Jackson is... a lot. 

“Yeah. I purposefully picked a guy based on how he compares to you.”

“Well I am the ideal man-- wait, that was sarcastic wasn’t it?”

“Yes.” Kihyun nods once, definitively and Jackson sulks. 

“How did you two meet anyways?”

It’s a long story. He wonders how Wonho would answer the question. Probably truthfully. It is the twenty-first century after all. He has nothing to be ashamed of.

“A dating app.”

Jackson stops rearranging the pastries in the display case. Between the two of them, the shop runs the smoothest it ever has and is cleaner than the day they opened it. Jackson is a casual busy body. Someone who never stops working, even if it seems like he isn’t doing much. Kihyun works non-stop, just to keep busy.

“You? A dating app? Wow. Well, that’s good for you.”

The older just hums. 

“So, is there gonna be a second date?” 

Kihyun can’t help the little smile that splits his face, “yeah. I think so.”

“Did he call you after?”

“Well, we texted.”

“You didn’t actually set another date though?”

“No...”

“Why not?” Jackson’s voice rises in pitch. 

“It just never came up. We decided we would see each other again, but didn’t specify when.”

“Well then you need to text him! You can’t let him slip through your fingers if you like him. Who asked who for the first date?”

“He asked me. We were only supposed to be hanging out, but...”

“You should ask him out this time. The reciprocity will show you’re interested too. Besides, guys like when other guys are bold.”

Kihyun questions the validity of that statement, but agrees that he should ask Wonho out. 

It falls on him to make it clear that he is interested in getting together again. No more complicity in miscommunication.

Yeah. He’ll do it. Just, not right now. He’s working and has to build up some courage first. Decide what words to use.

. . .

The new normal for Kihyun is to text Wonho less frequently throughout the day than they had as last semester was winding down, but to wake up to a myriad of memes and funny tweets in his DMs that Wonho sends him while he’s bored on his night shift at the hospital.

It’s just a change that occurs naturally given the directions their lives are heading in at the moment as the semester gears up. 

But he takes Jackson’s advice. Seizes the opportunity to start up a conversation and make his intentions clear in one swoop. 

As he gets off work, his phone doesn’t have any notifications from Wonho. It’s not like it’s weird or anything worthy of causing panic, but Kihyun wonders if the older is tired of him already. He’s not always good at responding to or sending jokes. 

Oh no, what if he thinks Kihyun’s not interested and that he should stop trying? He definitely needs to act fast. 

**Kihyun**

Hey :)

Would you want to hang out this week? 

The response comes a while later, but it gives Kihyun time to walk home, shower, and get dressed in clothes that don’t smell like he crawled into a can of coffee beans. 

**Wonho**

I’d love to!

What were you thinking?

**Kihyun**

Idk tbh

Just wanted to see you again

Maybe it’s too honest, but it would be flattering to receive such a message. Kihyun’s ideas center around making Wonho a meal, but that would mean having him over and it seems to soon for that. It’s cold out so he doesn’t want to be outside for long if they do go out. 

A restaurant seems too boring. 

This would be the perfect time to ask for advice from one of his friends. 

Minhyuk would likely tell him to walk Wonho to a jail cell for making him cry, so he doesn’t ask his overprotective best friend. 

Hyungwon would undoubtedly tell him to have sex with Wonho, so he doesn’t ask his forward friend. 

Yoongi would probably suggest they do something like sit at home, so he doesn’t ask his homebody friend. 

The advice wouldn’t be helpful.

He settles for brainstorming on his own.

**Wonho**

Youre so sweet

I’m free Friday afternoon

If that works

**Kihyun**

Yeah :)

We can have late lunch? 

I get out of class at 13:50

**Wonho**

Sure :)

I have to dip at 15:30 though

**Kihyun**

That’s plenty of time

Any lunch requests?

**Wonho**

R U gonna cook

**Kihyun**

Yes

**Wonho**

The lunchbox was delicious

You could make that again

I’d be happy

**Kihyun**

You don’t want something different?

Sweet potatoes?

Ramen?

**Wonho**

Tbh I’ll eat anything you make

Okay. So he did it. 

He successfully made plans. And he’s genuinely excited. All he has to do is cook a little bit-- something he doesn’t mind-- and show up for a pleasant hang out. 

Breathing feels easier.

**Kihyun**

Any allergies?

.

.

.

**Jooheon**

Bro

WOnho

BRo

**Wonho**

?

**Jooheon**

The prettiest girl

Just agreed to fo on a date w me

😍😍😍

**Wonho**

Congratz brother!

**Jooheon**

Thanks 😍😍😍

Moonbyul finally set me up 🥰🥰🥰

Wonho wonders where this conversation is going. In the meantime, he keeps on skimming his notes.

**Jooheon**

Then she asked

How your boyfriend is

Oh no. Oh  _ no _ . 

_ Here we go _ , Wonho thinks. 

**Jooheon**

SO why didn’t you tell me

THat you got a boyfriend

And who is he?

That guy from the group chat?

**Wonho**

_ So, uh...  _

Wonho doesn’t know what to tell him. His fingers hover over the keyboard as he ponders what he could possibly say to pacify Jooheon without making a bigger mess out of things.

He doesn’t want everyone to think he and Kihyun are already together because they aren’t and that might be kind of pressuring for Kihyun if all of a sudden a bunch of people on campus think he’s Wonho’s boyfriend. He also doesn’t want to tell Minju he lied to her.

But it’s probably the best option at this point, so he comes clean. Even though he knows that in doing so, he’ll have to explain a bit about the fake dating mishap. 

Through text, Jooheon doesn’t seem to understand it. He promises to tell everyone what happened at home over dinner if they’re all free.

. . .

Wonho’s working on homework when his door gets busted open by a worked up Jooheon. 

The older blinks in shock at the jarring noise. 

“Are you gonna explain now?”

“I’ll explain at dinner.”

Jooheon pouts, “but I’ve been waiting all day to find out!”

“I’m studying now and I’ll tell you and Changkyun in like an hour.”

“Fine.”

Wonho sighs in relief and goes back to reading until Changkyun calls for him to eat. 

He straightens up his books and packs the few he’ll bring to work so he can get stuff done when it slows down or he goes on break. He checks his outfit and makes sure he has his outerwear ready to go after dinner.

Before he can even sit at their accomodation-provided dinner table, Jooheon is already questioning him, ready to burst. 

“So, are you gonna tell me now?”

“I was going to wait til we were all together, but I guess Moonbyul already told Shownu.”

“What is this about?” Changkyun eyes Wonho wearily.

“I’m seeing someone.”

“Chat boy?” Changkyun guesses and Wonho can only nod. “Called it.”

“But how?” Jooheon protests and Wonho surmises he’s lost a bet. “It isn’t making sense.”

So Wonho explains the whole situation.

“Well that was a clusterfuck,” Changkyun comments dryly. 

Jooheon is clearly still processing by the look on his face. 

. . .

Kihyun’s texts about ‘hanging out’ come through after what was honestly the worst first few hours of a shift that Wonho has ever had. Everything from bullet wounds to failed surgeries, to complicated births had happened today. The atmosphere at the hospital had been tense as he did his rounds. To make matters worse, he hadn’t had time to get coffee before work, so he felt dead tired on his feet. 

But Kihyun’s texts were like espresso shots. He felt energized after getting them. 

**Wonho**

Soooo

Can we call this one a date

**Kihyun**

Yeah

I’d really like that

**Wonho**

Me too

😃😃😃

**Kihyun**

Good :)

**Wonho**

Can u send a selfie

**Kihyun**

Why?

**Wonho**

I’m tired at work

And need to see that cute face of yours

He smiles wickedly, imagining Kihyun’s cheeks a rosy pink. His expression only gets happier as an image is delivered to his phone. 

Kihyun looks adorable, hair ruffled like he’s ready for bed.

“What’s that face for?” One of his co-workers asks. 

He glances up at the younger guy with his wire framed glasses and cat like eyes. 

“Oh, just something cute.”

He’d always thought that Wonwoo (if that was his name) was kind of cold. He never seemed to show an interest in befriending anyone at the hospital, but then again, Wonho didn’t usually feel like talking much by the time his shift started either. 

Wonwoo leans over and peaks at the image. 

“Your boyfriend?”

“Almost.”

“Congratulations.”

“Yeah, thanks,” Wonho returns and awkwardly scratches at the back of his neck. “Do you have... someone?” He fumbles for words, suddenly realizing he doesn’t know what his co-worker’s sexuality is. 

He shakes his head  _ no _ , “too busy with school.”

“You’re young.”

What an odd thing for him to say, but it’s too late now.

“I know. It’s only first year. I’ve still got undergrad and med school to get through.”

Wonho nods, “good luck with that.”

“You’re not pre-med?”

“I’m going into physical therapy.”

“Oh, nice.”

Conversation falls flat again, but Wonwoo stands up a minute later. 

“I’ve got to go check on some patients. See you around.”

“See you.”

Wonho looks back at his phone and realizes he forgot to respond to Kihyun. 

**Wonho**

😍😍😍

What’re you so cute for, cutie

**Kihyun**

I was born this way

But I’m going to bed

Good night

**Wonho**

Good night cutie

Dream of me 😉


	21. Chapter 21

“Oh, is that lunch box for me?” Minhyuk cheers as he walks into the kitchen. 

Kihyun freezes, “no, but I’ll pack you the leftovers.”

Minhyuk stops raiding the fridge and turns to look at him. 

“Who is it for?” He asks critically, eyes blinking unevenly. 

“Wonho.”

“You’re hanging out with him. And you didn’t tell me.”

“Well, I thought you wouldn’t want to know.”

“Of course I want to know. We’re best friends. Who else is gonna tell the cops your last known location if he kills you?”

Kihyun rolls his eyes at his roommate’s dramatics.

“Well we’re having lunch today.”

“Have fun. And yes I want the leftovers.”

Well that wasn’t a complete trainwreck.

Kihyun finishes the lunch and packs three boxes. 

. . .

“Hey Cutie,” Wonho grins as he slides into a seat next to Kihyun in the cafeteria. 

“Hi.” He slides Wonho his lunchbox and breaks his own open.

“Oh, this looks delicious, Kihyun. Thanks for making it.”

“You’re welcome. I hope you like it.”

“It wasn’t all frozen or out of a box, so I’m sure I’ll love it.” Wonho tests a bite and breaks into a smile after he swallows. “It’s delicious. You really outdid yourself.”

Kihyun relaxes some, “so, how was your day?”

“Better now that I got to see you.”

Kihyun would normally roll his eyes at such a comment but he got the feeling Wonho meant it. 

“Classes go alright?”

“I haven’t been to any yet, but I didn’t finish all my readings so I had to get up early and do them.”

“Oh, yikes.”

“Yeah, so this is honestly the perfect break. How has your day been?”

“Fine,” he answers. “I’ve got two classes left and then I think I’m gonna go to my studio.”

“Cool! Are you working on any song in particular?”

“Not really. I was just gonna sit there and see what I could come up with. If nothing else, I’ll just practice some older songs.”

“You should send me a video.”

“Why?”

“So I can see!”

“Maybe,” Kihyun jokingly rolls his eyes. 

It’s a good lunch.

. . .

Sleep grips him even more than usual, so he stumbles out of the apartment. 

He gets to work early.

Whoever closed last night left the place cleaner than usual so he has plenty of time to get all the machines started and take the chairs off the tables.

After twenty minutes, he finally feels awake.

“Happy birthday!” Kihyun cheers as Hyungwon enters the cafe. 

The man in question stops and bashfully says thank you with a nervous smile. Kihyun wonders what that’s about, but some people just don’t like birthdays so he lets it go. 

“I know you said not to get you anything...” he trails off and watches Hyungwon’s eyes widen, “so I didn’t.” 

The birthday boy’s shoulders sag and he sighs in relief while Kihyun cackles at his own joke before sliding a new reusable water bottle, the same style Hyungwon seems to favor but in a matte black (which he doesn’t already own), across the counter without a word. 

“Thanks. I think this fits my Instagram aesthetic, don’t you?” He poses with it and purses his lips. 

Kihyun doesn’t use Instagram, but Hyungwon’s modelling proofs are frequently in black and white, or of him in monotone clothing, so he nods anyways. 

“Alright, alright. Enough of the celebration, get back here and help me get ready to open.”

It seems to be enough of a celebration to satisfy Kihyun, but not enough to annoy Hyungwon. He did good.

.

.

.

It shouldn’t feel like a big deal. 

It really shouldn’t. 

All that he’s doing is going to Kihyun’s apartment. It’s not like anything is going to happen. It’s too soon for him to expect anything and the younger seems like he’s not too comfortable with touch. 

He pushes all of the thoughts out of his mind, even when Kihyun assures him that his roommate-- the angry one from that night-- won’t be home. That was the whole point of this gathering. He and Kihyun were going to work on homework together because neither of them likes the library and Wonho’s apartment is too loud.

So he follows into the space, pausing to see how they decorated their student accommodations. 

The place smells clean and vaguely like ginger. It’s better than his own apartment, which sometimes smells like the trash the four of them neglect to take out.

There’s an extra armchair that doesn’t quite match the furniture provided by the housing department. Throw pillows and a faux vintage floor lamp give an insight to the kind of people that live here. 

His own apartment only has furniture and decorations that look cheap. And most of them were-- sourced from second hand stores and Ikea. 

Oh and an area rug. That just screams class. 

How did he land someone so classy?

“Cool place,” he comments lightly. 

“Thanks. Make yourself comfortable. Can I get you something to drink?” Kihyun asks after throwing his backpack onto the floor near the couch. 

“Do you have coffee?”

“Yeah. Decaf?” He asks, checking his watch. 

“No thanks. Caffeinated would be great.”

“Okay.”

He sounds unsure, but with work later, the older is going to need it.

Wonho shrugs off his bookbag and sits on the couch before digging out his homework.

Kihyun appears a few minutes later with some water for himself and a cup of coffee. 

It’s really cool, he thinks, that Kihyun trusts him enough to have him over in his own space. And so soon after getting to know one another. 

. . .

**Kihyun**

Oh GOd

**Wonho**

What’s wrong?

It seems too late at night to be getting a text from Kihyun. He hadn’t said anything was going on out of the ordinary. 

**Kihyun**

I’m drunj

**Wonho**

LOL

Are you out?

**Kihyun**

For Hyungwon’s birtday

**Wonho**

Having fun?

**Kihyun**

NI

NP

NO

I want to go home

**Wonho**

Why?

Drunk Kihyun seems funny. He likes the typos the younger makes and the way his texts seem emphatic (if texts can seem that way). 

**Kihyun**

Hyungwon just got shoved

Against the wall

And I want to leave

**Wonho**

Is he okay?

**Kihyun**

Tongues

**Wonho**

Um, ok?

So why don’t you leave?

**Kihyun**

I promised not to let him 

Sleep with anyone else

Bc his family is coming tm

**Wonho**

LOL Cutie

Want me to come get you guys?

**Kihyun**

Youre at work

**Wonho**

I get off in 30

Can you wait that long?

There’s no answer for a few minutes, but Wonho doesn’t sweat it. Instead he starts wrapping up his shift and tidying his station for the next person. 

**Kihyun**

Please

Were at vortex

**Wonho**

Yeah, I’ll be there in a while

By some stroke of luck, his co-worker shows up early for their shift by a few minutes, so he dips out. 

His scrubs won’t get him into the bar, so he resorts to standing outside to call Kihyun. 

“Hello?”

“Hey. I’m outside.”

“Okay.”

Kihyun hangs up and Wonho blinks at the screen.

The security guards that stand on the sidewalk make conversation with him as he waits for Kihyun. 

After a few minutes, a flushed Kihyun drags a taller man with swollen lips out of the bar. 

“Have a good night,” he says to the security guards before walking away with the two. 

“Hi,” Kihyun grins at him. 

“Hey. Did you guys close your tabs?”

“Yeah.”

“Tabs? Did I close mine?” The other guy says. 

“Hyungwon, you haven’t paid for a drink all night. You had that French guy buy your drinks. Then when you made out with that tall guy, he bought you drinks. And those girls took a birthday shot with you but they paid for it.”

“Oh, right.”

“So, it’s your birthday?” He asks Hyungwon. 

Hyungwon fixes him with a stare that seems to look into his soul and Wonho would be intimidated if he didn’t know the other was totally wasted.

“Yesterday. Who are you?”

“It’s my boyfriend, dumbass.”

“Oh, right. Muscle Man,” he says before levelling his gaze on Wonho as they walk. He’s worried that the other might trip over a crack in the sidewalk, but he walks with grace still-- if not a little zig zaggy. “You don’t look so muscular.”

“He would if he took his shirt off,” Kihyun answers. 

Wonho grins at the way he protests. It’s too cold to show off now. Taking his coat off is the absolute last thing he’ll do. 

“Bold, Yoo Kihyun. I bet you know all about his muscles, huh?”

“Shut up. That’s not what I meant you frog.”

Wonho finds the two to be quite entertaining as they bicker on the short walk home. 

Hyungwon lives near Kihyun so they drop him off first. 

“Thanks for coming to get me.”

“You’re welcome, Cutie.”

“Did I tell you that we’re dating now?”

“Are we?” Wonho teases. 

“Yeah. I decided it.”

“Okay. I’ll allow it.”

“Okay boyfriend.”

“Ki?”

Kihyun drops his head onto Wonho’s arm and hums to show he heard him. 

“Make sure to drink lots of water before you go to bed, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, right?”

“Mhm,” he hums and opens his eyes as they come to a stop outside of Kihyun’s building. 

“Good. Now get inside, it’s cold.”

“Okay,” Kihyun agrees, but he wraps his arms around Wonho and doesn’t move towards the door. 

Wonho holds him for a minute before ushering his sleepy, drunk boyfriend to go inside. 

He walks home with a smile and wonders how vividly Kihyun will remember what he said in the morning. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter brought to you from my vacation! And I'm gearing up to give Wonho and his flatmates some development since so far it's mostly been about Kihyun and friends (whoops).


	22. Chapter 22

Two weeks pass and things seem to be progressing smoothly.

Kihyun and Wonho work times to meet into both of their busy schedules even if Kihyun misses on a little sleep. They study together, eat together, and even manage to find the time to watch a movie together one Sunday afternoon.

It’s kind of hard given that Kihyun isn’t used to making time for others-- well, outside of Minhyuk and occasionally Yoongi. He also never realized how introverted he way. 

No, that was a lie. He was very much aware of how introverted he was. 

What he wasn’t aware of was how much of an extrovert Wonho was. The other was in constant contact with other people. Whether it was texting, greeting people on campus, or hanging around others.

As it works out, Kihyun makes himself ‘busy’ ever three or so days. It’s not that he doesn’t like Wonho, it’s just that he’s adjusting and he likes having time to himself. Constantly answering DMs and texts is hard work when Kihyun would rather be in his studio without any internet connectivity.

He makes the effort, though. Because he does like Wonho, and he does want things to work out, he updates the other on his day and when he’ll be busy. He makes it a habit to check his DMs once a day to answer to jokes and like comments. 

Kihyun realizes that relationships are give and take. He just hopes he does a good job at balancing his needs and being available for Wonho.

. . .

Kihyun doesn’t need to be walked to work, but Wonho’s class is cancelled, so it’s an opportunity that he takes. 

Also, Wonho may or may not be in dire need of coffee if the bounce of his fingertips is any indication.

“Maybe you should cut back on caffeine,” Kihyun comments. 

Wonho looks at him questioningly. 

“You’ve got the shakes,” he points out. The claim makes Wonho hold his hand up to examine it. 

His eyes widen comically. 

“What is happening?”

“When was the last time you had coffee, an energy drink, or your pre-work out?”

“Yesterday,” he answers after giving it some thought.

“I bet you’re going through some withdrawal. Let’s get you some tea. I’ll make some with less caffeine than your normal coffee.”

“But--”

“Come on, Wonho. You shouldn’t be so hooked on caffeine. It’s not good for you.”

He sighs and Kihyun is willing to bet there’s a can of something caffeinated in his bag. 

“There are worse things I could be addicted to.”

Kihyun scoffs, “yeah, okay, Mr. My-Body-Is-a-Temple. I still don’t see how people think you’re the epitome of health when you live off of coffee and ramen, but whatever.”

The door to the Espresso Lane opens with a tinkle and the smell of coffee hits the two of them like bricks. 

“My body  _ is _ a temple. At least you don’t seem to be complaining.”

Kihyun flushes red but he rolls his eyes.

They approach the counter and Kihyun ducks around it to get his apron and throw his backpack into the break room.

At Hyungwon’s words, he stops and stares at them. 

“You must be Wonho. It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Hyungwon.” Wonho grins and his eyes sparkle.

“What has the hamster told you about me?” He asks, cutting a teasing glare to Kihyun. 

“Shut up, frog.” He rolls his eyes when he realizes what exactly is going on.

“Why is he looking at me like that?”

“Because he already met you, idiot. You were just plastered.”

“Oh fuck. We met after I blacked out on my birthday, huh?”

“Yeah,” Wonho nods.

Kihyun feels triumphant somehow. 

“So now you’ve both met while sober,” he announces before going to put his backpack in the back room. When he exits, he pays them no mind while he fixes a to go cup of tea for Wonho. 

It takes a few seconds and he chooses matcha tea without asking Wonho. He assumes he’ll like the taste of it based on the things they eat when they’re together. 

When he turns around, he sees Hyungwon handing Wonho a tiny cup. 

“I swear to the forces that be if that is a shot of espresso, I’m gonna tie you both down to railroad tracks and watch you perish.”

“It’s water?” Wonho tries to defend with a sheepish look. 

Hyungwon just looks between them before stating that he won’t be held responsible as he didn’t know.

Kihyun confiscates the espresso, shoves the tea into his boyfriend’s hands, and then shoos him out of the cafe while telling him  _ not  _ drink any more caffeine for a while.

.

.

.

“How do you feel about a double date?” Moonbyul asks as soon as Wonho answers her video call. 

“A double date?” He blinks. “That could be fun.”

“Yeah, so you and Kihyun, Shownu and me, double date night. How about Saturday?”

“I’ll have to ask him, but I don’t work so it should be good.”

“I know you don’t work. I already looked at your schedule.” The angle at which she holds the phone makes her look funny and Wonho remembers that Moonbyul works in mysterious ways. Her reach extends everywhere. 

He doesn’t respond, so she starts talking again.

“Okay, well I’m at my class, so let me know what he says and I’ll tell you more about the plans.”

“Sure. See you.”

“Bye!” She hangs up and Wonho goes back to what he was doing before she called. 

But not before he texts Kihyun, because he knows he’ll forget if given the opportunity. 

**Wonho**

Hi

Do you want to go on a double date with some friends of mine?

**Kihyun**

Sure

When?

Wonho reads the reply when it comes in a little later. 

**Wonho**

Saturday?

My roommate and his girlfriend invited us

**Kihyun**

Okay. Where are we going?

**Wonho**

Not sure yet

Moonbyul just asked if you were available

**Kihyun**

Oh okay

Just lmk what the plan is

**Wonho**

Sure :)

How’s your day going?

**Kihyun**

Pretty good

Have you left your apartment yet?

**Wonho**

No, was just about to

**Kihyun**

You don’t want to be late

**Wonho**

I know

I’m going

**Kihyun**

I’ll talk to you later

My next class is starting

Let me know what she says

**Wonho**

Will do

. . .

Wonho waits for Kihyun to step out of his building and nervously glances at the time displayed on his cracked phone screen. 

The sound of the door opening wrenches his gaze away from the passage of time. Seconds he doesn’t have. 

He’s going to be late. Underestimating things might be his worst enemy. The restaurant where they’re supposed to meet is only a fifteen minute walk, but they’re supposed to be there in twelve. And Kihyun hasn’t exited yet. 

Plus, the person that just walked out of the building was too feminine to be Kihyun, so he’s still waiting. 

Moonbyul is going to have his hide. 

There’s not much that Wonho fears in this world, but an angry Moonbyul, mother, and/or Minhyuk qualifies as scary. Moonbyul hates lateness. 

Maybe today she’ll give him a pass. She can’t show off her crazy in front of Kihyun on their first meeting, right?

No, he’s definitely getting his butt cheeks handed to him on a platter later. Moon Byulyi plays no games. 

The door opens again and this time it’s Kihyun. He’s right on time-- or the time that Wonho told him, at least. 

“Hey,” Kihyun says, but Wonho is quick to grab his hand and start dragging him to the restaurant. “Are you going through withdrawal again? You’re shaking--”

“Hi, I made us unintentionally late and my roommate’s girlfriend is gonna kill me because of it,” he explains as he powerwalks. Kihyun stumbles a little but then catches up. 

“You made us late? How!”

“The restaurant is further than I thought.”

“Agh, Wonho. Slow down!” Kihyun wrenches his wrist from Wonho, causing him to stop. 

“We’ll just be a few minutes late then. It’s not a big deal.”

“It is, though.”

“Well she’s going to have to forgive us because I am not running there. Besides, I’m sure five minutes won’t matter. Wait, we aren’t going to be more than five minutes late, right?”

“No.”

“Okay. Great. So, Shownu and Moonbyul are the ones we’re meeting, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Cool. I’m excited to meet some of your friends.”

Wonho looks at him, “really? I thought you were nervous.”

“Not really. When you asked me that time, I felt like you’d put me in a room with all six hundred people that greet you on campus.”

“Oh.”

Anxiety is something Wonho doesn’t have a ton of experience with. When Kihyun had told him that he struggled with anxiety at times, especially social anxiety that he was trying to work his way through, Wonho had figured that it explained some things about Kihyun. Like-- why he was so hesitant to meet at first, and why Wonho felt special for getting to visit Kihyun’s house, and why the younger seemed to look cold every time he looked at him while saying hi to someone on campus.

“I’m cool with this, though. I prepared myself.”

Wonho wonders how he did that and debates on whether or not he can ask. He doesn’t want to be rude-- his mom raised him to be polite and considerate of others. 

Luckily, Kihyun seems to notice that the gears in his mind are turning.

“What is it?” Kihyun asks. 

“Can I ask how you prepare for this? Or like, what makes it cool?”

Kihyun ponders for a minute.

“Do you get nervous before presentations?”

Wonho thinks about it. Yeah, he does. He gets really nervous beforehand and feels like he’s going to jumble all of his words. 

He knows why too. 

“Yeah.”

“I do too. But if I prepared all of my notes and practiced the speaking parts and took care of myself before going to present, I could get up and be confident enough to wipe the floor with the audience. The same goes for performing. But it’s like that.”

Wonho thinks about it as they walk down the street. He can kind of relate, except that his confidence comes from his clothes. He always dresses for his presentation. And as weird as it is, he puts cartoon animals on his speech cards to calm himself down. Giraffes, elephants, unicorns, turtles, squirrels-- they make him remember that it’s all okay if he messes up.

Kihyun gently tugs his hand and he stumbles to the left, narrowly avoiding a light pole.

“Okay, I think I understand.”

“Yeah. So it just helps if I have a heads up and know who I’m meeting and where, kind of deal.”

“Cool. Got it.” He makes a mental note so that he can help Kihyun in the future. It makes sense-- he isn’t big on surprises either. 

He thinks back to when he surprised Kihyun by putting post it notes all over his music studio. It was overkill then and no shock that he had hated it. 

“Is this the place?” Kihyun asks, coming to a stop. 

“Yeah,” Wonho answers, seeing the back of Moonbyul’s head and Shownu’s broad shoulders. 

It’s warm inside the restaurant and Wonho wants to peel his coat off as soon as possible. The walls have silver wainscoting and are painted a burnt orange on top. Brown sticks that look dried hang out of tall turquoise vases.

He leads Kihyun in and lets him pick a seat first before sliding into the chair across from Shownu. 

The table is silver and some kind of chickpea salad looking thing sits on a bowl on the table. 

He forgot this was going to be a granola restaurant to fit Moonbyul’s grass-eating tendencies. It isn’t that bad, though. She assured him they had plenty of protein substitutes, and Shownu seemed to like the place so he was reassured.

“Hi!” Moonbyul greets instantly and Wonho breathes a sigh of relief. 

Everyone exchanges greetings and Wonho introduces Kihyun to his friends. 

“It’s so nice to finally meet you!”

Shownu nods at Moonbyul’s words before adding, “Wonho has told us a lot about you.”

“Really?” He glances at Wonho and Wonho just shrugs. 

“There’s a lot of things to say about you, Cutie.”

“They were all good things,” Moonbyul assures Kihyun. “So, you’re a music major?”

“Yeah,” he nods. “And you all?”

“Engineering,” Shownu answers. 

“Women and gender studies,” Moonbyul responds. 

“Do you volunteer at the women’s shelter?” Kihyun asks her.

“Yes!” She smiles. 

“I thought you looked familiar.”

Wonho looks at Shownu to find that he’s just as lost as he is. 

There’s so much he doesn’t know about Kihyun yet, but he can’t wait to find out. 

“Oh! You helped out with the homeless shelter drive, didn’t you?”

Kihyun nods, “yeah.”

“What a time that was. All of those women were so pleased to have sanitary products and clean clothing and underwear.”

“Good. Did you have the chance to meet them? I haven’t been back much since I took Sexuality and Gender.”

“I did meet them. A few of the women have since gotten jobs and steady housing through the empowerment house.”

“That’s good to hear.”

“So, you guys know each other?” Wonho asks.

“Vaguely,” Moonbyul answers. 

“Cool.”

Dinner goes smoothly from there and they stay away from any serious topics that are best left untouched during first meetings. There’ll be plenty of time later for them to discuss the world in its entirety. 

The four of them walk back towards campus together until they have to split up. 

“I have an early day tomorrow, and you don’t have to walk me back.”

“That’s okay. I’m going to the campus gym so I’m walking that way anyways.”

“The gym? Even after you just ate?”

“Yeah. So, what did you think of them?”

“I like them a lot. Shownu is pretty quiet, but he has a nice energy.”

“Yeah. He’s been a good friend of mine for years.”

“How long ago did you two meet?”

“In high school. He was my mentor on the dance team.”

“I didn’t know you danced.”

“I used to, but I liked lifting more, so I stopped dancing.”

“Huh.”

“What are you doing tomorrow?”

“Working and then I have a project for one of my music comp classes.”

“Oh, okay. I have to work too, but not until late.”

“I figured.” They stop outside of Kihyun’s building.

Wonho always wants to kiss Kihyun at this point in the night, but he doesn’t want to push him too far. He usually settles for a kiss on the cheek, but this time, Kihyun turns his face slightly and their lips press together. 

Kihyun pulls back first and utters “good night” before walking into his building. 

Was that--

Does that mean he can kiss him again next time?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have I had inspiration for every WIP I've worked on since April except this one? Yes.   
> Did I edit this chapter after finally managing to write it? No.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy it!


	23. Chapter 23

Kihyun worries his bottom lip. This seems like a bad idea. 

Minhyuk is in his “hottest ripped jeans” plus his favorite striped shirt with a jean jacket and coat overtop. He would no doubt get cold despite all his layers, especially at his exposed knobby knees, but that was Minhyuk. 

Wonho is in his typical joggers and hoodie. He always looks like he’s dressed to go to the gym, but then again, he probably is going to the gym.

Kihyun wears his normal jeans and a black long sleeved shirt. 

The three of them are about to head out to a diner and meet the rest of Wonho’s roommates for a midnight snack. 

It seemed like a bad idea. Any time he wasn’t in bed by midnight because of Minhyuk was guaranteed to be bad, but he was working on reminding himself that this time would be okay. No one would be drinking and therefore he was safe. 

Plus, Wonho’s friends were coming. The other half of his boyfriend’s roommates were supposedly loud and energetic.

It was project season for Wonho and Minhyuk, and Kihyun was ready to celebrate finishing his first song of the semester, so they all agreed to go out for midnight breakfast as a treat.

Minhyuk returns to his room to grab an extra layer as Kihyun throws his outer wear on. 

It’s going to be fine, he knows. At one point, he was excited for this night, so he tries to get that feeling back.

“He’s still glaring at me,” Wonho whispers nervously. “I think he’s gonna fist me.”

“For the last time, Wonho. That does not mean what you think it does. And besides, no one is getting fisted. Ever.”

“What the fuck did I just hear?” Minhyuk balks as he comes into the room. “Kihyun, I’m calling the police.”

“Oh my god.” He rolls his eyes. “Would you all both just chill out?”

Minhyuk thinks it’s strange for Kihyun to be the one telling them all to chill out. 

“Look, I know we got off to a rough start, but I really want the two of you to get along since you’re both important to me. That means no more being nervous, Wonho. And no more glaring and shady comments, Minhyuk.”

Minhyuk levels his gaze at Wonho. 

“Alright. I’ll do my best to get along with him, but only since he makes you happy.”

“Thank you.”

“Minhyuk, I’d really like to be your friend.”

Minhyuk is the friendliest person on campus. Everyone wants to be his friend. He even has almost two thousand followers on Twitter just from the university. His place as a fixture at local bars, the active roles he plays on campus, and a stint he did as a model for the university’s recruitment program all led to the quasi-fame he built up. 

At the face level, he was popular and in demand.

Kihyun’s glad to see it after the kids at their high school branded him as weird. It hadn’t been easy for Minhyuk. 

At another level, one more personal, Minhyuk had a core group of good friends. Mark, Kihyun, Jeonghan, Wheein, and a few other people. While they weren’t always the best influences on his liver, they did have his back.

Kihyun thinks it would do him good to have a few more people that aren’t heavy drinkers or partiers in his fold. 

“We’ll see.”

If the situation weren’t so personally important he would laugh. 

“Okay, we’re gonna be late if we wait around--” he insists before Minhyuk breezes off, no longer waiting around. 

“Let’s go! Come on! Kihyun, give me your hand.”

Kihyun rolls his eyes and Wonho sends him a questioning look. 

“I’m not holding anyone’s hands.”

Minhyuk stops in his tracks and turns to make his demands.

“I said give me your hand. I have to let Wonho know who loved you first.”

Kihyun questions how the plan works if Minhyuk announces it, but then again, subtlety does often go undiscovered.

Kihyun shoves both his hands in his pockets and sets off without them, leaving them scrambling to lock the apartment door and follow after him.

On the way to the diner, Kihyun manages to find some middle ground for Minhyuk and Wonho. Soon, they hold their own conversation about marine biology and Kihyun breathes easier. No more warring between boyfriend and best friend. That’s a lot of stress off of his plate.

It’s nippy out despite all of his layers as they walk down the street. A few people scurry around, heading home from the library or a cafe. 

.

.

.

The diner that they arrive at looks like the 1970's threw up inside of it. The seating is all a vibrant yellow vinyl and the floors are a plain brown linoleum. Silver accents the colors in the light fixtures and of the tables. 

At least it's warm and the coffee smells good.

"I swear by this place. They have the best food and the servers are some of the nicest people I've ever met. It's always open, too. I come here a lot after I go out drinking with friends, so they know me here."

Wonho nods, "I like the vibes."

Kihyun just rolls his eyes at the two of them before going to pick out a table that will comfortably fit five people. 

"Is this one okay?" He asks, pointing to the booth in the corner. It's a wrap around one that will allow everyone to see one another easily and hopefully foster a good conversation. 

"Sure, Cutie."

"I call sitting in the middle!"

"No. You always have to pee, like, six times when we come here."

"Not true," Minhyuk bickers back. 

"It is too true. You're gonna drink coffee and I'm not getting up for you."

"Stop arguing with me in front of your man. But fine," Minhyuk relents after a minute. "Wonho, you sit in the middle then."

"Sure." He slides into the booth without putting up a fight. Kihyun slides into the seat next to him and Wonho smiles, earning himself a smile back. 

Minhyuk takes his seat, too. 

"So, did your friends say they were on their way?" Kihyun asks. 

Wonho nods, "they should be here in a few minutes."

"Oh good."

"I can't wait to order food. I don't even need to look at the menu."

"What do you get?" Wonho asks, looking at Minhyuk.

"A strawberry waffle."

"That sounds good. What about you, Ki?"

"I like the omelettes here."

Wonho nods. 

"Hi, is this everyone?" A blonde server asks.

"We have two more coming," Minhyuk says. "How's it going, Chan?"

"Oh hey Minhyuk. Things are going. You want your usual coffee?"

"Yes please!"

"And what can I get you two?"

Wonho waits to speak and lets Kihyun order first. 

"I'll just have water, thanks."

"Can I have some coffee?"

"Caffeinated or decaf?"

"Can I have half and half?" He asks, remembering he's supposed to be cutting down on his caffeine intake. 

Despite the fact that it's midnight, he's definitely going to the gym later. There'll be plenty of time to catch up on sleep tomorrow.

"Sure. I'll be right back with drinks and some more menus."

"Thanks Channie!"

"Are you--" Wonho stops speaking and turns to the recently opened door before grinning widely and waving his friends over. 

They look flushed from the cold and tired from working on projects late, but healthy and happy nonetheless. 

The two trek over while peeling off layers so that they can slide into the booth.

"Hey guys!" Wonho waits for them to get a little more settled before introducing everyone to one another. "So, this is Kihyun, my boyfriend, and Minhyuk, his best friend. These are my roommates, Jooheon and Changkyun."

"Nice to meet you!" Minhyuk immediately springs to action. Socializing must be one of his favorite past times, Wonho realizes. 

The two of them are sort of like Changkyun and Jooheon. One is outgoing and an extrovert while the other is quieter. He can see how it works between them. 

"Oh, it's our pleasure," Changkyun responds evenly. 

"We've been dying to meet Kihyun!" Jooheon almost shouts.

"Volume," Wonho reminds him gently. Not only will his own ears hurt, he doesn't want to draw too much attention to their table, even though there's not many other patrons. 

"Right, my bad. Anyways, it's nice to meet you guys. We were really excited to come out, especially after working on projects and papers and stuff."

"It's nice to finally meet you. Wonho has told me a lot of good things about you both."

Changkyun's eyes meet Wonho's and he holds his arms up in surrender. 

"Hey everyone. Can I take your orders?”

“Oh, hey Chan. Yeah. I’ll have...”

Wonho checks his phone as everyone orders until it’s his turn. Kihyun orders his meal and Wonho watches how cute he looks as he collects everyone’s menus and folds them shut before handing them to the waiter. 

He’s so organized. 

Despite his best efforts, he zones out as everyone talks to one another. Last he heard, Kihyun and Changkyun were talking about English hip hop music and Jooheon was talking to Minhyuk about how they met Chan. 

There’s a sharp pinch at his thigh and he jolts before looking to Kihyun. 

“You spaced out on me.”

“Sorry. I’m starving.”

Kihyun nods, “you should’ve let me make you a snack.”

He always knows best, doesn’t he? 

“Are you listening, Ki? We’re talking about your showcase.”

“What? Why?”

“Because they didn’t know you were musically inclined.”

“Oh,” Kihyun’s shoulders seem to relax, but he still looks tiny in the booth. “I’m not that good.”

“Yes, you are,” Wonho protests. “You’re great!”

“You haven’t even heard me sing,” Kihyun points out. 

“Wait, really?”

“I don’t need to hear you to know,” Wonho defends. 

“Do you have a video from the showcase?” Changkyun asks Minhyuk. 

That’s how the three of them-- Wonho, Jooheon, and Changkyun, that is-- end up crowded around Minhyuk’s phone. 

“Wow.”

They’re interrupted by the arrival of the food, but it’s probably a good thing. Kihyun’s neck is starting to get red and it probably won’t be long until his cheeks are too. 

Wonho supposes that he’s not used to such attention from an intimate group like this, but none of them are critics, so he doesn’t get why he’s nervous. 

“You’re amazing, Cutie,” Wonho informs him. “But I’m sure you knew that.”

“I-- thank you.”

“Yeah, you are.”

“We should all come to your next showcase.”

“There’s one at the end of the semester,” Minhyuk supplies to the two youngest.

Wonho admires that Minhyuk knows that. If it wasn’t clear before, it sure is now. Minhyuk is a great friend to Kihyun.

He listens to them talk as he eats, but eventually the food wins his focus. 

“Oh, I got an extra serving of toast!” Minhyuk blinks. 

“Do you want it?” Wonho asks. 

“Not really. Here.”

Wonho accepts the toast and wonders if that means they’re some sort of friends now. He hopes so.

“I hope they don’t charge you for that,” Kihyun says to Minhyuk. 

“It’s Chan. Aren’t you two friends?” Jooheon asks him.

“Yeah?”

"I’m sure it’s fine. Don't look a gift horse in the mouth."

"What? No. Have you ever even read that story?" Changkyun looks at Jooheon like he's stupid. 

"Uh, yeah. In, like, the tenth grade."

"And you forgot that the whole point of it is that you should look the gift horse in the mouth? Otherwise enemy troops will take over the city or other such consequences?"

"Shh, let him enjoy it. Besides, no one would say the phrase if there wasn't any point to it," Minhyuk defends Jooheon. 

Wonho's a little lost at what all is going on, but he at least knows there's two sides to the coin. The saying does exist as Jooheon had said it, but indeed the whole point of the story was that the Trojans should have looked the gift horse in the mouth. He had read the Odyssey, but modern times had changed. 

"Why  _ do _ we say it like that?" He asks. 

"I dunno," Jooheon answers and everyone else just shrugs. 

"Maybe there's another pop culture reference we're missing," Changkyun points out. 

Wonho doubts the Odyssey qualifies as pop culture, but it is a classic, so he doesn't call attention to the fallacy. 

"That's a good point."

"We came to take a break from projects and here we are discussing important things."

"I don't think this is all that important," Changkyun counters.

"Why can't we talk about video games, or music, or something? My brain is fried."

"I think my last brain cell is in a coma," Wonho jokes.

The conversation takes a turn towards new movies out and although Wonho hasn’t seen them in full, he knows what they’re about. Luckily, Kihyun doesn’t seem to watch much TV and Changkyun refuses to watch anything but foreign films, so he doesn’t feel like the odd one out. 

.

.

.

Wonho was a little nervous to introduce Kihyun to Jooheon and Changkyun. The last time he brought anyone home (for a project, no less) the two made it their mission to embarrass him by telling awful stories from high school sensationalized enough to make him look like the biggest idiot ever. 

Luckily, this time, they seemed to understand how much he likes Kihyun. 

Jooheon was a bunch of bright energy and Changkyun played things cool like always. Or, at least they were normal while they were around Minhyuk and Kihyun.

It’s the next day when Wonho wakes up that they start in on him.

He’d opened the can of worms by asking them what they thought of Kihyun.

"Kihyun is a cutie," Jooheon teases.

"Don’t start with me," Wonho points a finger at him. 

“He’s defensive,” Changkyun comments lowly, “he must really like this guy.”

“It’s pretty clear they like each other. They are dating, after all. And you saw them yesterday together. Wonho made heart eyes at him when he wasn’t shovelling food into his mouth.”

“You’re right. I haven’t seen him this way since high school.”

Oh, here they go. He might as well leave now and save himself the trouble-- but the need to eat some breakfast wins and he stays. 

“Don’t you two have homework?”

“No,” Changkyun answers. Wonho’s not surprised. The kid never seems to do his homework, but it’s only because he’s smart enough that it doesn’t take him hours. Jooheon and Wonho aren’t so lucky, but at least they know how to study effectively.

“On the real, Wonho, I like Kihyun. Minhyuk was really cool too.”

Wonho nods at Jooheon’s words, “I’m glad you like him.”

“I do too. Is he always that quiet, though?”

“He gets nervous around new people, he said.”

“Is that why it took you two so long to get together?”

“Probably. I mean, besides the obvious,” Changkyun says with a vague gesture to the air. 

Likely he means the Big Miscommunication, but Wonho can’t be sure. 

“Did Shownu like him?” Jooheon asks. 

“Yeah. He and Moonbyul seemed to like him a lot.”

“Good.”

“Have you met his other friends?” Changkyun wonders. It’s not like him to take such an interest in Wonho’s life, but maybe the older is just overthinking things.

“Yeah. I’ve met a few of them.” His phone buzzes in his pocket obnoxiously. He looks down to see a picture of his mom’s smiling face. “Sorry guys. It’s my mom.”

He excuses himself to his room and realizes he’ll have to get ready while on the phone if he doesn’t want to be late for class.


	24. Chapter 24

Nerves rush Kihyun’s body. 

His music is a part of him. Usually, he doesn’t play it for others outside of class. 

Even then, the songs aren’t so personal. 

Sharing a piece of himself is hard. It makes him nervous. The giggly kind. He hates it. 

But Wonho smiles and it’s exactly that smile that inspired him to write this song. It had only taken him three weeks to get the song to a point that he felt it was ready enough to play.

So he plays the demo version he recorded to get some outside opinions on it. His professor had tasked the class with writing a song for a music festival at which he would be performing. The winner would be allowed to perform it with the professor and wouldn’t have to turn in a final. 

So he plays it for them. Puts himself out there with nothing to comfort him other than the fact that they’re not trained assholes like his classmates. That and the fact that Wonho has to like it. It’s, like, a boyfriend obligation. 

And maybe he’d played it for him before and knew he liked it already. 

Jooheon has a talent with words and, well, there was no way to split Jooheon and Changkyun for something like this. Not that he particularly minded the youngest being there. 

He bares himself in front of these two guys that he’s only met a handful of times because Minhyuk would blow smoke up his ass and he doesn’t dare show his soul to Hyungwon. Hyungwon probably doesn’t think Kihyun even has a soul, but most of all, Hyungwon’s too critical about music that isn’t EDM. He’d talked about his love for indie music and he was a snob for lyrics.

So he settles for Changkyun and Jooheon who maintain a preferable distance between Kihyun with a taste for music that shouldn’t be too honest, but also shouldn’t be uninformed.

Until they start to joke around as it plays and tease Wonho with the lyrics. 

He tries to ask for their input. Some constructive criticism, but they just joke with one another. Especially Jooheon.

"Look, I know you don't mean to be rude, but I actually worked really hard on this and you're hurting my feelings," Kihyun tells Jooheon, who’s in the middle of yet another joke. 

He immediately stops laughing, "I'm sorry, Kihyun. It's fantastic and I don't mean to insult you or your work."

“I accept your apology.”

“We just can't believe a song so elegantly written could be about such a blockhead.” Kihyun looks at Changkyun upon hearing his low voice.

“I am not a--” 

“Wonho, you literally cried for your mom when you went bungee jumping.”

“Yeah,  _ after  _ we told you you didn't have to do it and you acted all big and mighty.”

“And remember the time you got a paper cut opening a pack of sticky notes?”

“Don't forget the time he forgot what a weasel was called and called it a wet ferret.”

“Guys stop! You're embarrassing me,” he whines as he tries to cover Kihyun's ears as the younger laughs.

“You're so cute,” Kihyun pecks his cheek. 

“Gross,” Jooheon says and then pouts, “where's my affection?”

Changkyun just pats his cheek, “where’s your girlfriend?.”

“Minju is in class right now,” Wonho says as he looks up, thinking if that’s where she really is. He doesn’t remember things like that about people, so Kihyun is surprised. 

“What about you, Changkyun?” Kihyun asks, inquiring about the youngest's relationship status. 

“I'm not into him like that and he's straight--” 

“I meant are you seeing someone?” Kihyun says with a small laugh, more nervous than anything else. What if Changkyun takes it the wrong way? Or what if Wonho takes it the same way? 

No, he wouldn’t. He’s sensible.

“Oh. No, you know anyone interested?”

“Maybe,” Kihyun shrugs. “What's your type?”

“He doesn't have one,” Jooheon answers, smoothly transitioning back into their conversation. 

“Changkyunnie is a little whore,” Wonho teases. 

Kihyun cringes, “I hate that word. But anyways, my coworker is always complaining about how lonely he is.”

“What does he look like?” 

Kihyun takes his phone out of his pocket and searches for Hyungwon's Instagram, “he does some modeling. I know him from my job off campus.”

“You can definitely give him my number. He’s hot.”

“I’ll talk to him at work next week.”

. . .

There’s a lull in customers ordering, and Kihyun realizes this is his chance to play matchmaker. 

“So,” Kihyun pauses and wonders how he should word his question. He never knows what Hyungwon will say when he asks even the simplest of questions. “Had any new dates lately?”

Hyungwon, immersed in trying to fix one of the coffee machines, takes a second to respond. Kihyun watches his spindly fingers work for a few long seconds. 

“No, the last guy I was supposed to meet ghosted me.” Hyungwon glances at Kihyun and narrows his eyes. “Why? You rarely bring up my trysts first.”

“Because I met someone I think you might like.”

Hyungwon raises an eyebrow, but doesn’t say anything. Instead he twirls his finger in the air and Kihyun understands what he means. 

He turns around with an expectant smile to serve an approaching customer. Turns out the woman only needs a new spoon so Kihyun fetches one for her and delivers it. She returns back to her table before Hyungwon starts up their conversation again. 

“Who is it?”

“He’s a friend on Wonho’s. He’s a bit younger, but he seems like a really cool guy.”

“How old is he?”

“Don’t make that face at me, Surfboard. He’s of age,” Kihyun rolls his eyes. “He’s a first year, so only two years younger than us.”

“I don’t know. Younger isn’t usually my type.”

“His name is Changkyun, so give it some thought. He seems pretty no-strings.”

.

.

.

“Your mom’s calling you,” Kihyun points out before looking back to his textbook. 

Wonho stands, “be right back.” He exits the study room and walks out of the building before returning her call. 

“Hey mom. Sorry, I was just leaving the library.”

“You hate the library.”

“My boyfriend got us a study room so it’s not so bad.”

“Oh, how is he, by the way?”

“He’s good. He’s working on a paper right now.”

She hums in the back of her throat, “and how are you?”

“I’m fine. How are you doing?”

They catch up and Wonho paces around the patio by the library where people are allowed to smoke. Nobody makes use of the patio, so it affords him some privacy. If anyone does come by, all he has to deal with is a faint smell of strawberry cupcake or minty mango since most people don’t smoke paper cigarettes anymore.

. . .

Another few days pass and Wonho works extra hours because he wants to ask Kihyun to go to a nice restaurant with him in a few weeks. That means he has to save up now so he doesn’t have to ask anyone else for help paying his date’s bill. 

There isn’t a lot of time left until he has to head to work, but he’s hungry. Semesters prior-- and if Kihyun was busy-- he’d eat a cup of ramen and head to work. Now, however, he has a boyfriend that cares about nutrition and won’t burn down a kitchen. It helps that he pre-cooks foods so there’s not a lot of waiting around. 

They’ve figured out a system that seems pretty fair. Wonho pays for their food and drink when they go out and Kihyun spends almost equivalent at the grocery store.

Kihyun brings out two plates to the living room and sets them on the coffee table.

He’s lost in his own mind about familial responsibilities (i.e. his mom’s birthday that’s next month), schoolwork to be done (a lab report or three), and ways to treat Kihyun to a date to celebrate their one month anniversary (that fancy dinner, probably).

“Tell me about your family,” Wonho says, resting his head on the back of the couch, body turned to Kihyun. It occurs to him that he doesn’t know all that much, only what the younger had shared with him over winter break and even then the details were a bit fuzzy.

“What about them?”

“I don’t know. Like your parents and any siblings.”

“Hmm, well my mom and dad are both fifty. I have a younger brother named Kiwoo. He’s just going to college this year.”

“Wow. Good for him,” he says sincerely. 

“Yeah. I’m pretty proud. We should eat before it gets cold.”

Wonho nods in agreement and they both sit forward to grab their plates.

“What about you?”

“It’s just me and my mom,” he shrugs, knowing what Kihyun meant. He’s surprised they hadn’t had this conversation sooner, but then again, he was pretty sure Kihyun had figured things out contextually. 

“Your mom seems pretty cool, though. Like, from what you told me.”

Kihyun has to remind him and recognition shows on Wonho’s face.

“Oh yeah. She is. She’s my biggest supporter.”

Is it just Wonho’s eyes, or does the smile on the younger’s face dim? 

“I’m happy to hear that. What’s her name?”

Wonho pushes his suspicions to the side and tells him all about her, occasionally hearing more about Kihyun’s family as the conversation flows naturally.

. . .

“You know how we were supposed to hang out this weekend? Can I take a raincheck?”

“Sure,” Kihyun blinks. “Is everything okay?”

“Oh yeah, they just need me at the hospital.”

“Right, we can just postpone. No big deal.”

“Great. Thanks.”

“Don’t thank me-- just do what you need to do. I shouldn’t control your life.”


	25. Chapter 25

Kihyun finishes serving the customer and once they walk away, he makes conversation with Hyungwon while wiping down the counter.

“So, how was your date?”

For once, Kihyun knows there was a date without Hyungwon having told him beforehand. Changkyun had told Wonho the other night and, of course, Wonho had told him what was transpiring.

“It was fine. We had to end the night early so we're going out again on Thursday.”

“Why on Thursday?” Kihyun wrinkles his nose. That sounds like a mistake. Hyungwon definitely has class on Friday morning.

“Dollar beer night and I don't have to work the next day.”

Something tells Kihyun he should know that Thursdays are dollar beer night; at least, the straightforward tone Hyungwon uses makes him think so. 

He wonders if Wonho likes dollar beer night. Minhyuk didn’t even like it, so Kihyun knew he wouldn’t. But what if that’s something his boyfriend wants to do? Then he recalls that Wonho works most of the night anyways and probably wouldn’t be able to go. Maybe he’d ask and see. 

“Oh, right. Well, I hope things turn out okay.”

Hyungwon shrugs and his eyes focus on the front window, “I think it’ll be fine enough.”

Kihyun doesn't press the issue. It’s one date turned into two, there’s nothing to press. Besides, Hyungwon isn’t one to withhold information from him. It’ll all be alright.

. . .

As Kihyun cooks and Minhyuk preps some vegetables to eat, Wonho steals some of the vegetables and drinks the broth of the ramen.

“Wonho, seriously, you’re less help than Minhyuk.”

“Hey!” Minhyuk protests.

Wonho looks sheepish as he nibbles on the chopped vegetables in his hand. 

“Just go sit down.”

“If he stays we won’t have any food left for dinner,” Minhyuk teases. 

“Enough, he’s not eating anymore until it’s done anyways,” Kihyun mediates. 

Wonho sits somewhere where the food is out of reach, but he’s still in the kitchen and a part of the cooking process. Or conversation process is more like it. 

The three of them talk while Kihyun cooks and Minhyuk does prep work.

.

.

.

Wonho glances at the clock and finds that it’s now past five. It’s too late. He was smart to eat a protein bar before coming over.

“You should eat before work,” Kihyun frowns gently. 

“Oh, I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“They’re running tests on me later. I’m not supposed to eat.”

“Wait a minute,” Kihyun says with eyes narrowed. “I thought you were working at the hospital later.”

Wonho blinks, “uh, no, I am taking part in a study.”

“You didn’t say you would be the patient!”

A wet rag meets his jean covered thigh. At least Kihyun didn’t aim where it might sting.

“Ow!” He whines anyways. “I’m just doing it for the money!”

Kihyun freezes and Wonho can tell he’s said too much. 

Minhyuk walks back into the kitchen and pauses at the tension in the kitchen before slowly backing out to the living room. 

“You signed up to be in a medical research program for money? You work overtime and you’re a student. I don’t want to judge and I don’t want to be involved in your finances, but I don’t understand.”

“I just want to be able to afford to take you on nice dates. What’s wrong with that?”

Kihyun frowns and Wonho wonders if he’s actually done something wrong. 

“You don’t have to spend money on me. I don’t want you to.”

“But I  _ want _ to,” he stresses and takes a step closer to Kihyun.

“Yeah and that’s sweet of you, but I’d rather you cut down on your hours so that you can get enough sleep or have enough time to do all of your homework. I’m your boyfriend, not your mom, so I don’t want to criticize your life choices, but you need to start putting yourself first.”

“You’re not understanding me,” he pouts. He knows Kihyun is just trying to look out for him. 

“I’m trying to respect your choices, but seriously-- it’s more important to me that you’re healthy. Expensive dates don’t matter to me and I appreciate the effort, but I want you to prioritize Wonho.”

Wonho pauses to think about it and yeah-- Kihyun probably has a point, but he’s still going to go through with the trial. The extra cash won’t hurt and all that’ll happen is he’ll get strapped to some sensors or something. 

“Thanks, Ki, for caring about me.”

Kihyun’s annoyance breaks with a roll of his eyes at Wonho’s dopey smile. 

“Ugh, fine. Stop looking at me like that. I’ll pack you the leftovers.”

. . .

“Hey,” Kihyun says as he answers the call. “What’s up?”

“Just wanted to hear your voice.” Wonho relaxes into his chair while there’s a quiet minute.

He imagines that Kihyun smiles to himself, “are you on your break now?”

He gives a hum of “just about” and a tired sigh. 

“It’s gonna be a long night. We’ve already had like six or eight ‘emergencies’. But I’m hoping things will slow down now.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. Are you off now?”

“Yeah. I was just about to walk home.”

“Would you--” Wonho starts tentatively, even though he really doesn’t mind. Kihyun had told him as much before.

“Bring you food?” He sighs lightly. “Yes. What would you like?”

“Instant ramen, the chicken flavor, please. Thanks cutie!”

Wonho hangs up and organizes his work space before checking the computer for any notifications. 

Several minutes pass and then he hears footsteps, light and paced evenly. With a glance up, he confirms it’s his lovely boyfriend with chicken instant ramen in hand.

“Hey,” Wonho smiles endearingly. 

Kihyun returns it with his own radiant smile and Wonho’s heart stops for a minute before kicking back in.

“Hey.” He pulls the ramen packet out of his pocket and holds it out for Wonho. 

“Thanks baby.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Stay while I eat?”

“Just for a minute,” he says. “I’ve got to work on something before classes tomorrow.”

Wonho pouts as he microwaves his dinner. 

“I wish you could stay a while.”

“I know. Changkyun and Hyungwon are going on a date tonight,” he says. 

“Dollar beer night?” Wonho guesses and Kihyun nods. “Interesting.”

“Would you ever want to go to that?”

“What? Dollar beer night?” When Kihyun nods in affirmation he scrunches his nose up. “No. It’s overrated. Gross old beer and a ton of drunk people I can barely stand to be in class with? No thanks.”

Wonho wonders why he asked. He thinks he reads relief on Kihyun’s face and he wonders if someone said something to him on campus about it. Big Matthew invited him along every week and every week he declined, saying he had to work or had a project.

“Why?”

Kihyun shrugs, “Hyungwon mentioned it and I wondered if you liked that kind of thing. I hate drinking, but I know you like it.”

Wonho shrugs then, “I prefer just a few friends and some drinks. Rocky’s isn’t really my scene.”

They talk for a few more minutes before Kihyun is standing up, stretching, saying he should go. 

Wonho’s ramen bowl lays finished on the table as he gets up to hug Kihyun despite the other people around. 

Kihyun squirms since he isn’t big on PDA, but he tolerates it because he knows Wonho likes it. 

Wonho pushes his luck and kisses Kihyun straight on the lips, causing the younger to flush and get flustered. 

Kihyun all but runs away while Wonho cleans up and gets back to work. 

. . .

**Seungcheol**

Bro

Dude

Wonho

**Wonho**

What

**Seungcheol**

Why aren’t you answering my calls?

**Wonho**

Im in the middle of smth

Cant have my phone on

**Seungcheol**

What if it was an emergency

**Wonho**

Is it an emergency

**Seungcheol**

No

**Wonho**

Y r u like this

**Seungcheol**

Idk

Anyways

Can I come visit?

**Wonho**

I’ll have to ask the guys

**Seungcheol**

K

Tell Jooheon I got a new playlist for him

**Wonho**

Yeah ok

Idk why you dont just tell him yourself

**Seungcheol**

Too lazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry about the wait!! The next chapters should be coming out soon. There probably won't be too many chapters left.


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw// slight panic attack (but I think Ki handles it okay) if you feel you need to skip it, please do!! You can look for the three dots spaced out that usually signals the POV change. I'm happy to give a recap in the comments for anyone who needs it. Take care of yourselves!

Kihyun sits cross legged on his bed with his laptop in front of him. His phone is next to him and a textbook is discarded at the foot of his bed from one of his gen ed classes. 

The clock in the bottom right corner of the screen is stagnant. 

Any minute now. 

**Wonho**

Did the email come in yet

**Kihyun**

Not yet. 

I'm so nervous. 

**Wonho**

Its gonna be good news

How could it not

It's you we're talking baout

**Kihyun**

Thanks

**Wonho**

Np

**Kihyun**

Oh my God

Oh God

**Wonho**

What?

**Kihyun**

The email came in.

He pulls his laptop closer and clicks on the email, setting his phone on his leg. 

His phone rings and Kihyun barely looks at it as he swipes to accept the call. He presses the phone to his ear. All the while, his eyes are busy scanning the email. There's the greeting.

The formality of explaining the email,

The grading of the assignment.

And then the result--

Kim Woosung

"Did you get it? Did you win?"

"No."

"Oh, oh," Wonho pauses in shock. Kihyun can only stare at Woosung's name on the screen. It should read Kihyun. If he stares long enough it might change, right? "It's alright, Cutie. You did your best and--"

"Why isn't anything I do good enough?"

"It is. Everything you do is great. You're only listening to the negative reviews and critiques, but you need--"

"Then I would have won the contest and I would be in the show instead of Woosung."

"Kihyun, you have to breathe. It's okay."

"How could professor Park pick him over me anyways? He sounds like he's about to cry every time he sings." 

"Kihyun."

"No. I just don't understand and I'm really upset."

"I'm sure he's a talented singer too, but you can't expect to win every competition."

"You don't get it, Wonho," Kihyun stresses. 

He really does feel like he's about to cry because his stress level is rising and it's about as tall as his lowest rib. Pretty soon the pressure will build in his lungs. The weight will manifest on his chest.

"This was my chance to perform and I fucked it up."

"You're upset and I get that--"

"You really don't." Kihyun has never taken the time to explain it to him and he knows it isn't his boyfriend's fault. Trying to put his feelings into words would take too much time and there's so much backstory involved. It'll seem stupid to anybody else, but it isn't stupid to him. It's his life. "You can't have any idea how badly I wanted to go perform at that show. It was my chance. Now my name is never gonna get out there."

_ And I'll be stuck waiting tables until my dad retires and then I'll be stuck behind a stove for the rest of my life.  _

Kihyun doesn't want that. 

He doesn't want to do commercial cooking and cleaning for the rest of his life. Goyang is not his final calling, no matter how hard he tries to make himself believe it is. 

It hurts less to make himself think it's what he wants instead of what he has to do. 

Letting his parents’business die is... There's no point. He's never going to catch his star that'll make his dreams come true. He'll take over the restaurant because that's what he's supposed to do as the first sibling. Besides, it's not like Kiwoo has any interest in it. 

And being a star is risky business. One day you’re in and the next day you’re cancelled. He would be naive and stupid to think if he tried to make it big, things would work out. He wasn’t even the best fish in the small pond of campus. How did he ever think he could swim in the ocean?

So the restaurant is the safe bet. The bet he’s been prepared for since he was young. The only option his parents saw for him unless he somehow signed a recording contract in the next year. 

The future is, resignedly he realizes, going to be spent bent over a table doing arithmetic on old paper menus as he crunches numbers to make sure that ends are meeting. Staying in the black will be the only thing that'll matter to him, especially because there's no way Wonho's going to want to live in Goyang and help out around the restaurant. 

If they even lasted that long. 

Wonho was so popular and he always had people around him vying for his attention. There was no way he'd stick with Kihyun that long. He'll get bored soon enough, especially once he realizes that Kihyun's future is bleak. There are people out there that share his interest in lifting and like socializing. There are people from his major and hometown and-- surely they're a better fit than Kihyun. 

_ Okay, enough _ , he thinks. He’s still on the phone and he doesn’t want to do this now. Doesn’t want Wonho to see it. 

"Look, I need to go. I'll talk to you later."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. Bye." He hangs up the phone before Wonho can say anything else, despite how guilty even that small of an action makes him feel.

Kihyun sets his laptop aside and heads into the tiny closet in his room. He leaves the light off and shuts the door, sliding down it until he meets the laminate wood flooring. He lists the colors of his clothing and what articles of clothing they are. If he knows what material it's made of, he notes that too. He tries to figure out the temperature of the room and the floor, the way the laminate feels beneath his fingers. 

After he successfully calms himself down, he knows it's time to sort through his emotions.

_ Breathe _ he reminds himself and counts the seconds as he breathes to slow himself down. 

It takes him a minute, but he tries to ground himself by describing his surroundings.

Wonho is kind and he's interested in Kihyun. He may work too hard sometimes and he may be stupid when he values over his pride over asking for help, but for now he's Kihyun's. If things don't work out between them in the future, it'll be okay. Kihyun is his own person. But he’ll enjoy it for now, for what it is.

As for the contest, he makes himself calm down. 

So he didn't win. He's not a sore loser usually. It just meant a lot. He'll owe Wonho an apology and an explanation once he feels better. He'll have to try and explain himself without getting too into detail, because really, no one wants to hear about all that.

At least he'd thrown his fit about losing in the privacy of his own room so he doesn't have to apologize to Woosung, who admittedly, does have a nice voice. The emotion in his voice probably coalesces with the professor’s vision.

And losing one contest wasn’t the end of his career. He could still make it. There were more opportunities and other ways he could catch his big break.

If he still went to therapy, his therapist would be proud. Everything she told him to journal he'd at least done in his head. It was a start, especially considering he'd countered every negative thought with a positive one. 

After a solid half an hour of wasted time that he refuses to let himself feel guilty about, he exits his closet. 

The bathroom floor is made of cold tile, but he stands on a bathmat as he washes his face and puts on lotion. It's just something routine he does to make himself feel a little more human again. 

Calmed down, he re-reads the professor's email for any information he may need and makes a reminder to congratulate Woosung in class next week. 

He reaches for his phone and drafts a text to Wonho. 

**Kihyun**

Sorry for freaking out. I'm good again. 

**Wonho**

You sure? 

I was worried

**Kihyun**

Yeah, I just got overwhelmed. I thought about it and it's okay. 

He deserves it and it doesn't mean that I don't. 

**Wonho**

Good

I'm glad you're ok

Dinner later?

**Kihyun**

I can't. :(

I have to hit the studio for a music comp project. 

**Wonho**

Ok

**Kihyun**

Try to eat something that isn't instant ramen?

**Wonho**

I'll do my best :)

**Kihyun**

Good. I'll see you tomorrow.

**Wonho**

Yepp 

Take care of urself Cutie.

Everything's okay. He sets his phone and laptop aside before going to fill up his water bottle and eat some fruit. 

Minhyuk's left a sticky note on the fridge. On it, he has drawn a sun with a cartoon face and the words "I love u Ki" which is kind of cute. He'll have to draw one for MInhyuk and stick it next to that one.

Kihyun takes his time to relax for a few more minutes before packing up his things and heading to his studio to knock his project out. He doesn’t want to be bogged down with it for the next few weeks and he has inspiration now, so it works out.

He treks to the studio building and puts in a solid hour of work before he checks his phone. 

**Wonho**

I failed

**Kihyun**

Instant ramen again?

**Wonho**

Yea

Kihyun just shakes his head at the text. Sometimes he feels more like Wonho’s keeper than his boyfriend, but it’s okay. At least Wonho treats him well in return and is forgiving when Kihyun stops functioning as he should.

.  .  .

**Wonho**

Hey cutie

**Kihyun**

Hi

**Wonho**

My best friend from home is coming next weekend

**Kihyun**

Oh yeah?

**Wonho**

Yeah!

I want you to meet him

**Kihyun**

I’d love to

**Wonho**

Great!

He’ll be spending the weekend

So is there a day that’s good for you

**Kihyun**

Pretty much any

**Wonho**

How would you feel about hanging out with him while I’m at work?

**Kihyun**

Um, I guess that would be fine

**Wonho**

Not too much?

Wonho knows that Kihyun is hesitant around strangers, so he double checks to give Kihyun a way out. Kihyun appreciates that.

**Kihyun**

No, I’m sure he’s fine

**Wonho**

Yeah, he’s really easy going

I’m gonna leave my shift early

So it’ll only be a few hours

Then I thought we could all go grab a drink

**Kihyun**

Yeah, that sounds fine

**Wonho**

Awesome!!

Thanks sm cutie

**Kihyun**

No problem

.

.

.

**Kihyun**

Hey

**Wonho**

Everything okay?

**Kihyun**

I can't find Seuncheol

**Wonho**

Wait fr?

**Kihyun**

Yeah

Like, Idk where he is

**Wonho**

Let me text him

. . .

**Wonho**

Wya

**Seungcheol**

Running late

B there in 15

Wonho wonder why Seungcheol didn't bother to tell him earlier. 

Better yet, he could tell Kihyun himself. So he adds the two to a group chat. 

**Wonho**

Cheol will be there in 15

**Seungcheol**

Sorry I'm late

**Kihyun**

No worries

I'll be here

Now that that's solved, Wonho doesn't have to worry about anything except getting off of work early. 

That and when he's going to have time to go home and see his mom. It's been a while since break ended and he misses her. 

On his walk back to campus, he calls his mom and schedules a time to visit home. He's sure Kihyun won't have a problem with it. He'd once told him that he admired how close of a relationship he had with his mom. And Kihyun always pushed Wonho to do things he wanted to do and not worry about him. 

**Wonho**

Where are you guys now

**Kihyun**

My apt

**Seungcheol**

Bring donuts

Its cheat day

**Wonho**

Donuts?

**Kihyun**

Don't listen to him

**Wonho**

What is happening

**Seungcheol**

I'm hungry

**Kihyun**

I just fed him

At the barrage of incoming text messages, Wonho checks his phone again.

**Wonho**

Im confused

**Seungcheol**

Fed me what

**Kihyun**

Noodles

**Wonho**

?

**Kihyun**

And meat

**Seungcheol**

Like one piece

**Kihyun**

Wonho

Just come over here

**Seungcheol**

No i need sweets

He could just get Seungcheol something... or he could tell Seungcheol where to go and buy himself a few minutes alone with Kihyun. Plus, he shouldn't encourage a "cheat" day for Seungcheol. The two of them learned about the proper way to diet and nutrition balances and all of that together. They decided they were going to get fit and lose weight together the correct, healthy way.

**Kihyun**

I have cookies

He refuses to eat them

**Seungcheol**

Their stale

**Kihyun**

Don't believe him

I baked them yesterday with Minhyuk.

That sounds like something Kihyun would do, but Seungcheol usually doesn't find fault in foods. He's practically a vacuum. 

**Wonho**

What kind of cookies?

**Kihyun**

Chocolate chip

**Seungcheol**

They taste like oatmeal raisin

**Wonho**

Im omw

Seungcheol could just deal with it. 

**Seungcheol**

Wonho.

If you don't bring snax

**Kihyun**

See you soon!

**Seungcheol**

This friendship will end

Wonho chuckles and sticks his phone back in his pocket. He hurries up the steps to Kihyun's apartment building and lets himself in. 

He knocks on the door and waits until a lightly wrestling Seungcheol and Kihyun open the door. 

"Empty handed! Hah!"

"Fuck," he groans. "What the heck man? Your childhood friend asks you for sweets and you don't get any?"

"He believed me more," Kihyun gloats. 

"That's what this is about?"

"Well..."

"Are you even hungry?" He directs to Seungcheol who just scratches the back of his neck. "Wait, are there even cookies here?"

Kihyun shakes his head no.

"That's it. I'm out." He turns around and fakes like he's about to leave. 

Kihyun rolls his eyes and tugs Wonho inside before shutting the door. 

"Get in here. We're about to start a movie."

"No cuddling on the couch." Wonho turns to pout at Seungcheol. 

"But you look so cute today, Cheolie."

"Shut up. Not in front of your boyfriend."

"Kihyun?"

"Yes?"

"Can I snuggle Cheol?"

"Sure."

"You're supposed to say no!"

Kihyun just shrugs and Wonho laughs before settling down between them on the couch.

. . .

"So, what did you think?"

"About?" Kihyun asks when they're having lunch a few days later. 

Wonho shovels some more food and his mouth and chews before clarifying. "About Seungcheol."

"Oh." Kihyun struggles to finish chewing so Wonho fills the space with another question.

"Did you like him?"

"Yeah, he's pretty cool. I think I like your other friends more since they're calmer, but he's not bad at all."

Wonho nods before sheepishly admitting, "I was afraid you'd hate him."

"No. Well, a little. He tried to wrestle me."

"Oh no."

"Stupid big as--" Kihyun cuts himself off and substitutes, "butthead."

Wonho chuckles, "I'm telling him you called him that."

"Do it. I'll tell Jooheon you called his girlfriend gullible."

"Don't! He'll never forgive me. No one can say anything bad about her."

Kihyun rolls his eyes half-heartedly. Wonho knows he didn’t mean anything by it.

Wonho watches a young woman feed her, presumed, boyfriend. 

“Hey. Let me take you on a date.”

“Wonho, it’s okay. We don’t have to go out.”

“It’s fine, Cutie. I got paid today so we can go somewhere.”

Kihyun ruminates for a minute before relenting, “okay. But you’re not paying for everything.”

“Deal,” he smiles. “How about next week? Somewhere nice?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I so struggle to write Wonho's halves :-(


	27. Chapter 27

Kihyun and Hyungwon clean their workspace after the morning rush dies down.

“How did things with Changkyun work out?” 

Hyungwon shrugs, “he's not really my type.”

“Oh, I'm sorry.”

“It's fine. At least I got a good lay out of him.”

There's a brief pause as Hyungwon fiddles with the coffee maker he's cleaning.

“What is your type then?”

“Someone closer to my height,” he jokes then quiets down as he thinks. “Maybe someone a little more emotionally invested in me? I know I come across as not being into the guys I see for more than sex, but I do want some affection. Changkyun made me see that. I was always the one to text first and stuff. Unless he was calling me to his apartment at two in the morning."

“That's perfectly normal, to want affection that is.”

The taller of the two changes the topic quickly, “how're you and Wonho?”

Kihyun couldn't stop the smile on his face if he tried, “we're great.”

“Find me someone that cares about me like he cares about you,” Hyungwon pouts. “Except with a higher sex drive.”

“I wouldn’t know about his sex drive,” Kihyun says unthinkingly. 

“What does that mean?”

“Nevermind! Forget I said anything.”

“Wait, are you two seriously not having sex?”

Kihyun doesn’t say anything, focuses on his cleaning, and hopes that Hyungwon will move on. But he doesn’t. 

“How? Are you, like, waiting? You've been together for a while now. So, why is that? Because he’s hot as fuck and you’re cute as fuck, so, like, I feel like you should be banging all the time.”

“Thanks for the compliment?”

“Wait, for real, tell me.”

Kihyun ignores him, but for the rest of their shift, Hyungwon continues to pester him with questions.

“I’m gonna ask Jackson to change my shifts if you ask me one more time.”

Hyungwon scoffs, “you know he won’t give up working with Mark unless it’s an emergency.”

“Kind of unhealthy, don’t you think? They do everything together.”

“You’re right. But you wouldn’t want to work with them anyways.”

“True.”

“Stop changing the subject!”

“Okay, fine. I’m not ready to sleep with him so we’re not having sex.”

“Oh, okay. Cool.” 

And just like that, with a shrug of his shoulders, he moves on. 

Kihyun was expecting something more. Like almost castigation or just some light criticism, not whatever blasé blasé response Hyungwon had given. 

He should’ve known. Despite having befriended Hyungwon due to their shared work, he was still a good person. Kihyun is grateful.

. . .

When Kihyun gets home from work, Minhyuk is sitting on the couch with a movie playing and his laptop in his lap. 

He can tell the older isn’t actually working by the way he’s staring at the wall.

“Minhyuk? What’re you doing home? You’re usually at the bar by this time.” He sets his bag and keys down to take in the state of the living room. 

“I’m not going tonight.”

“Oh, too busy?”

“No. Just too tired. I don’t want to dress up and walk downtown to spend money tonight. I’m tired of being out all the time.”

There’s an existential exhaustion in his eyes. Kihyun’s elated that his roommate will be home for the night.

“Well if you want, we can cook something and watch TV like old times.”

“I already ate--”

“Meal prepping, then. I had dinner already too.”

“Let’s do it,” Minhyuk says with a small smile. 

He’s not alone and neither is Minhyuk.

. 

.

.

Wonho looks up when the earbuds are pulled out of his ears. 

“Huh?”

Kihyun looks at him, head tilted to the side. “Changkyun let me in.”

Wonho’s eyes look to the time in the bottom right corner of his computer screen. 

“Oh! I lost track of time.”

“That’s okay.”

“Give me a second to throw my clothes on and we can go.”

“Unless you made a reservation some place, I’m in no hurry.”

Wonho appreciates Kihyun’s nonchalance. Kihyun maenouvers himself onto his bed with a jump. It’s funny to watch. 

“No, no reservations this time.” He dips into his closet to change into a nicer shirt and dress socks. 

He gets dressed quickly, not wanting to keep his boyfriend waiting much longer. 

When he steps outside he smiles at Kihyun. 

“I’m ready to go.”

Kihyun slides off of his comforter and turns to straighten it before walking towards Wonho. 

Acting fast, Wonho bends down to kiss Kihyun. 

“Hi. Sorry to have kept you waiting.”

Kihyun lightly slaps his arm, but his cheeks are that same shade of pink Wonho loves so much. 

“Let’s go. What did you have planned anyways?” He asks as they leave the apartment.

Wonho elects to take the stairs and holds the door open for Kihyun.

"I got us tickets to the planetarium. We can go look at the stars."

"It's a shame we can't see them from the city."

"Yeah the light pollution isn't ideal, but at least this way I don't have to worry about you getting cold."

“You say that like I’m cold blooded or something!” Kihyun complains.

Wonho grabs his hand, “you’re small. I have to keep you warm and safe. Besides, I didn’t want to spend the majority of our date travelling out of the city, so this is the best I could do.”

“Well, you’re lucky I like you. And the stars.”

. . .

Kihyun sits quietly and Wonho enjoys the way Kihyun uses his smaller fingers to trace shapes onto his hand. That and the beauty of him. The slope of his nose and the purse of his lips from the side is gorgeous. Wonho greatly enjoys moments in time like this. 

"What do you dream about doing?"

Wonho thinks about his answer for a moment. 

It had always been to graduate school and get a decent job. Save money and eventually get his mom a house and then himself. He hadn't given too much thought to a partner and a family. He always figured if it would happen, it would happen and he didn't have to worry about it. 

But Kihyun asking in that tone with that far away look on his face makes Wonho rethink it. He knows he isn't hinting that he wants Wonho to answer a future together. His boyfriend prefers honesty over cheesy answers-- or, at least, he does when he has that look on his face. The look that says his mind is in a troubled future.

Sometimes Wonho speculates about his future with Kihyun, but not often. He prefers to live in the present. 

So he ignores all of that and thinks about what is at the core of all of his ambitions.

"I want to help people."

Kihyun glances at him, "through health?"

"Yeah. Physical therapy. Help people learn to walk again, or at least to feel more comfortable in their own bodies." He shrugs like it’s nothing. His mind also thinks about his mom. He wants to help her financially so that she’s paid back, in some way, for the years she gave up for her son.

Kihyun nods, "that's admirable."

"Thanks. What about you?"

Kihyun just shrugs.

“Sorry, I’m not meant to be spaced out on our date.”

“Is something bothering you?”

Kihyun sighs and leans his head on Wonho’s shoulders. 

“You’re too good for me.”

“That sounded a lot like trying to change the subject.”

“It wasn’t. I think looking at the stars for the past two hours is making me too existential.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Let’s get dinner. I’ll pay for it since you bought the tickets. Let’s go.”

Wonho stands up with Kihyun and follows him to a restaurant. 

On the way, they talk about how spring break will be upon them soon.

“Are you going anywhere?” Kihyun asks. He expects Wonho to say no, he’s working or yeah, he’s going home. 

“Oh yeah! Changkyun’s dad is flying us out to visit him, so we’re going to New York.”

“Oh, really? That’s cool.”

“I’m excited. He told me a few weeks ago and I still feel like it’s some kind of prank.”

“He wouldn’t do that to you.”

“I know he wouldn’t. It’s just hard to believe it’s real. I’ve never left Korea before.”

“Me either. New York is gonna be amazing. You’ll have to tell me all about it, okay?”

“I definitely will! We should go one day. Maybe after graduation,” Wonho comments. “But over break I’ll send you pictures and we can talk on the phone and stuff, so you don’t have to worry about me being gone.”

Kihyun laughs lightly, “I won’t worry. I know you’ll be having a good time.”

“What’re your plans for break?”

“I don’t know yet. Usually Minhyuk and I laze around over break.”

“You’re not going home?”

“Oh, no I am. We hang out at my parents house.”

“Is that what you did over winter break?”

“No, he was out of town at his grandparent’s house for most of it.”

Wonho nods in acknowledgement, “and what about that friend you got wine drunk with? Gonna see him and send me some more cute selfies?”

“Yoongi and Minhyuk don’t get along like that, so probably not.”

“They don’t get along?”

“Nah. It’s kind of like Seungcheol when he said he never felt like he was a part of the group with you and the guys.”

Wonho thinks about it for a second, “I guess I can see that. Jooheon is the only one he talks to outside of me.”

A crack in the sidewalk that neither of them saw has Wonho almost sprawling on the ground as Kihyun cackles into the evening air. 

“You almost just ate shit!” He points out. People stop to see what’s happening as the two laugh. 

“Would you still date me if I lost my teeth?”

“No,” Kihyun answers, but grabs his hand anyways. 

“Good thing I didn’t actually face plant, then.”

"Indeed," Kihyun agrees. He stretches tall to press a kiss to Wonho's cheek, leaving the taller to scramble behind him on their way to the restaurant. 

“Maybe I should almost trip more often.” Kihyun sends him a questioning look, so Wonho elaborates. “That way you initiate more PDA.”

“Don’t make a habit of it. I prefer you in one piece.”

“Fine. But only for another kiss.” He pouts when Kihyun ignores him. “Later then?”

“Fine. Later.”

Wonho makes sure to cash in on it when he drops Kihyun off that night.


	28. Chapter 28

Minhyuk breezes into the cafe with a large smile on his face and approaches the counter to order. 

“Hi KiKi.”

“Hi Minnie. Everything okay?”

“Just didn't want to sit around the house by myself,” he waves him off.

“What would you like?”

“Could you make me my hot chocolate with butterscotch syrup?” 

Kihyun knows something's bothering Minhyuk but he doesn't know what it could be. Something about the older is off, he can tell by how his eyes don’t meet his for as long as they normally would. 

And as for the cause? There’s not much that it could be, but he doesn’t cogitate about it. Instead he just starts to make the best hot chocolate for his best friend that he can possibly make, and refuses payment. 

“Who was that?” Hyungwon asks once Minhyuk finds a place to sit. 

“Huh? Oh, that's my best friend, Minhyuk. We live together.”

“He's cute.”

The way Hyungwon stresses the word cute and can't seem to take his eyes off of Minhyuk has Kihyun itching to play matchmaker again. 

But then Minhyuk catches his eye and smiles at him a degree smaller than normal and he remembers that it's his best friend. He knows all the ways that he's been hurt in the past and sometimes he wished he didn’t. Minhyuk definitely didn’t deserve any of it. His friend's troubles weigh on his own mind frequently.

“He's a really sweet person.”

“I bet he is. I’d like to taste.”

Kihyun wants to hit Hyungwon, but he’s too far away. 

“Gross. That’s my best friend. He doesn’t need you drooling over him.”

“Let me drop off his drink.”

“No.”

Hyungwon moves to grab it, striding closer and outstretching a long arm. 

Kihyun jerks it away, careful not to spill, but he’s blocked in the corner by the counter and a machine. 

They bicker about it and Kihyun almost throws the thing at him in defeat, but Hyungwon ends up delivering it in the end. 

“Thanks,” he hears Minhyuk say. “Are you sure it didn’t get cold with how long you two fought over who would bring it over here?”

. . .

**Yoongi**

Stopped by your parents restaurant today

**Kihyun**

How were they?

**Yoongi**

They looked well

Kiwoo was with a girl

**Kihyun**

He was??

**Yoongi**

Yepp

She was cute

**Kihyun**

I haven’t heard anything about her

**Yoongi**

Prodigal son

Don’t you ever call your parents?

**Kihyun**

Shut up

**Yoongi**

...

**Kihyun**

You’re really nosy, you know that?

**Yoongi**

I didn’t say anything

**Kihyun**

Fine. 

I’ll ask Kiwoo about her. 

**Yoongi**

😏

**Kihyun**

Tht was oddly sugestive

**Yoongi**

What’re you gonna do about it Wonho? 😒

**Kihyun**

Respect ur friendship

Good bye

**Yoongi**

Uh-huh

That’s what I thought

Kihyun laughs at both Yoongi’s text and the way Wonho pouts as they watch TV. He nudges Wonho, “you read the whole conversation. I know you’re not mad.”

“Why is he so scary?”

Kihyun chuckles, “I can’t believe you’re afraid of him.”

“He’s intimidating!”

“Are you scared of me?”

“Sometimes.”

Kihyun is clearly shocked by his answer, “wait, what?”

“Kihyun, I once watched you pick a fight with a man twice your size when he harrassed a gay couple.”

“That was one time!”

“You glared so hard at him and you were so vindictive, I thought he was gonna pee his pants. You also spook me when you point the kitchen knife at me.”

“There was no malicious intent--” he retorts.

“Still, talking with your hands while chopping vegetables? Spooky.”

“Ugh. Go back to pouting at your show. I’m gonna text Kiwoo.”

Wonho pulls Kihyun closer to him so that he can hold him and occasionally read over his shoulder while the younger texts. 

Kihyun doesn’t mind, used to it, and starts a chat with his brother. 

**Kihyun**

So, who is she?

**Kiwoo**

Who?

**Kihyun**

Your girlfriend

**Kiwoo**

Girlfriend?

**Kihyun**

Don’t play dumb.

**Kiwoo**

😒😒😒

**Kihyun**

The girl you brought to the restaurant. 

You said you’d never take a girl there.

**Kiwoo**

Who told you?

That rat, Min Yoongi?

**Kihyun**

Doesn’t matter

**Kiwoo**

So it was him.

That snake.

**Kihyun**

I want to know.

So does he.

**Kiwoo**

There’s nothing to tell. 

**Kihyun**

Oh?

**Kiwoo**

I asked her out. 

She said no. 

**Kihyun**

Oh...😟

Do you want to talk about it?

**Kiwoo**

Ew, no.

**Kihyun**

Okay

Sorry that happened

There are more girls out there

**Kiwoo**

Yeah

“Poor little dude,” Wonho murmurs. 

“He must’ve really liked her.”

“Send him a picture of a dog. He’ll like that.”

Kihyun hands the phone to Wonho and allows him to download a photo of his choosing to send to his brother. 

**Kihyun**

Its ok lil dude

*IMG506489*

**Kiwoo**

Thanks Wonho

Kihyun takes the phone back and updates Yoongi.

**Kihyun**

He said she rejected him...

**Yoongi**

Poor kid

Did you ask Minhyuk?

**Kihyun**

Not yet

He’s in class

**Yoongi**

Maybe his sibs know something.

**Kihyun**

Yeah. 

Wait.

We’re weirdly invested in this.

**Yoongi**

I have to have some drama to live for. 

You know I don’t have cable.

**Kihyun**

Fine.

I’ll ask him about it later. 

. . .

“Where have you been?” Kihyun asks MInhyuk as the older enters the apartment. Wonho has long since gone, scheduled for a shift at the hospital.

“I was on a date,” he replies simply, heading into his room. 

At first Kihyun thinks nothing of it. 

Then it occurs to him that the only person Minhyuk has flirted with lately, to Kihyun’s knowledge, is Hyungwon.

He springs off of the couch. 

“With who?” He demands as he runs to the doorway. 

Minhyuk looks at him with a small smile and shrugs. 

Kihyun’s eyes narrow. “So it was him.”

“He was nice! A complete gentleman.”

No more information passes Minhyuk’s lips. Kihyun skulks back to his coursework.

. . .

**Yoongi**

What did you find out?

**Kihyun**

He went on a date with my co-worker.

**Yoongi**

Kiwoo did?

**Kihyun**

What? No. Minhyuk.

**Yoongi**

Oh.

Well what about the highschoolers?

**Kihyun**

I didn’t ask! I was more concerned about him and Hyungwon

**Yoongi**

Wait, Farmers Only Hyungwon?

**Kihyun**

Yes

That menace

**Yoongi**

LMAO @ menace

They seem like they’re both idiots

It could work

**Kihyun**

How does that mean anything?

**Yoongi**

Love is a strange thing, Kihyun.

**Kihyun**

Since you know so much about it

**Yoongi**

Look at you and muscle man. 

I’ve watched your relationship blossom.

**Kihyun**

You never said anything about us.

**Yoongi**

I didn’t threaten to beat his ass though.

**Kihyun**

I’ll tell you right now you couldn’t reach it.

**Yoongi**

😒😒😒

And you could?

Don’t answer that.

I don’t want to know.

Kihyun cackles and leaves him on read.

.

.

.

“Can you come hang out one last time before I leave?”

“Um, yes. My mom will be picking me up tomorrow morning, I think.”

“Great. I’m home until ten, so you’ll be home in time to get a good night’s rest.”

“Right. Want me to bring anything?”

“I already ate, but if you have some more of that cake, bring it.”

“Sure.”   
  


. . .

“So are they, like, together now?” Wonho asks Kihyun, blinking in confusion. He thought he was following his boyfriend's story well, but now he has questions.

Kihyun nods. 

“That was fast.”

It seems like just a few days ago Wonho was being informed that Hyungwon and Minhyuk had met.

“Yes! That’s what I’m saying!”

“Why do you seem so upset?” Wonho wonders, searching Kihyun’s face. 

Could it be-- no. Kihyun is with him, he definitely doesn’t have a crush on his best friend for the past few years or the taller, more suave co-worker.

“Because I don’t want Minhyuk to get hurt! He’s my best friend and he’s been through a lot. And I know Hyungwon doesn’t ever set out to hurt anyone, but he’s just so...” Kihyun lets out a frustrated breath as he fails to think of a word that could capture Hyungwon’s behavior. 

Wonho smooths his hair before reaching for Kihyun’s hand.

“Well, you know how he is.” He decides to settle and spew that in favor of continuing his rant. “He enjoys his fun but he seems to get tired of people quickly and I don’t want that to happen to Minhyuk.”

“Kihyun, I know you’re just worried, but they’re adults. They can make their own decisions and Minhyuk can handle himself.”

“Can he though? He drinks. Heavily. I just don’t want another call from the E.R.”

Wonho listens and tries his best to empathize. He definitely wouldn’t want to face something of the sort from any of his friends, either. 

“I see. Have you voiced your concerns to Minhyuk?”

“No. How can I? What, am I supposed to just casually say ‘hey, I’m worried about your new relationship. The one that makes you happy’? What kind of friend am I?”

“A good one. Maybe you don’t have to say anything to him. And I know you’ll be there for him if anything goes wrong, so that’s enough.”

Kihyun slumps and leans onto Wonho’s shoulder. “You’re right.”

Wonho turns his own body so he can kiss away Kihyun’s pout. 

Before he knows it, he’s got Kihyun underneath of him and his tongue in his mouth.

All of his thoughts fly out of his brain and all he can think about is his boyfriend.

Then the door opens.

“Holy shit!” Jooheon curses and sprints for his room, wanting to give the couple their privacy.

“Get it in!” Changkyun says in his low tone of voice. The grin on his face is the first thing that greets Wonho once he pulls away from Kihyun.

“Fuck,” the younger curses. 

“Uh, hey guys. I wasn’t expecting you back this early.”

“Dude, it’s already nine. We have to get ready to leave soon,” Changkyun tells him. 

“Oh.”

“Well, I guess I should say my good byes, huh?” Kihyun asks nonchalantly. Wonho can see his ears are flaming red and he’s only trying to be nonchalant, though. 

“Come say them in my room,” Wonho says, tugging his arm gently. He means so that Kihyun can be away from Changkyun’s incriminating gaze, but Kihyun’s face flushes further red and he holds in a snicker.

At least he’s not the only one worked up.

. . .

It’s spring break and Wonho is in the “Land of the Free.” Changkyun’s already downstairs with his dad, an early riser despite jet lag, apparently. Wonho just woke up and stretches a little before reaching for his phone. It’s 10 am his time which means it’s around midnight for Kihyun. 

He calls anyways, hoping to talk to his boyfriend for a minute or two.

“Hey! I know it’s late, but I just wanted to hear your voice.”

“Hi Wonnie. How was your day?” Kihyun asks. 

Wonho chuckles, “it just started. How was yours?”

Kihyun yawns, “long. The restaurant was really busy today.”

“Well, that’s good. You sound tired, I don’t want to keep you.”

“No, it’s okay. Tell me your plans for the day.”

Wonho begins to explain the things Changkyun and his family have planned for him. He prattles on about his expectations until he hears Kihyun’s breathing level off. 

He smiles. 

“Night, Ki.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cheers from Alaska! I'm on my way to South Korea :)


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some OT7 drinking shenanigans

“Minhyuk was definitely that kid in middle school that combined all the food left on his tray and made someone else eat it.”

Kihyun almost gags at the memories that brings up. He’d seen some nasty things in the cafeteria back in the day. They weren’t even friends then-- he’d just spotted him grossing other kids out back in the day.

“That would have been Wonho if he'd left any food on his plate,” Changkyun throws from the couch, not looking up from his phone. 

“Are you insinuating I’m fat?” Wonho seriously can’t believe the nerve of Changkyun and if he wasn’t so comfortable with Kihyun leaning on his side, he’d reach over to smack the younger.

Changkyun snorts, “just because your biceps are bigger than my head doesn’t mean I’m afraid of you.”

“Shut up before he eats all of the chips in retaliation like last time,” Jooheon smacks Changkyun’s arm. At least he got hit, even if Jooheon is a liar. He hadn’t eaten all of the chips, he had just... been the one to finish them. It’s not like he ate the whole bag or did it out of spite, though. The kids would roast him anyway, so he saved his energy and instead huffed out a breath.

Shownu seems to unfreeze, not thinking about whatever had preoccupied him anymore, “remember the time he ate seven cupcakes?”

“Oh god,” he groans. “My stomach hurts just thinking about it.”

“I thought he got diabetes.”

"It was a terrible dare. Who thought that up?"

“Babe, you have got to learn how to say no to dares,” Kihyun chastises with a hand to his boyfriend’s bicep, arm twisting awkwardly with the motion.

“He’s literally no better now,” Hyungwon informs his old friends. “Last week at their apartment I dared him to drink water out of their toilet and the only reason he didn’t is because Kihyun wouldn’t let him.”

“Let’s set one thing straight,” Wonho defends himself, “Kihyun’s toilet is the cleanest one on campus most likely, and that’s the only reason why I would do it.”

Kihyun pinches his thigh to avoid twisting his arm again and the attention switches to Jooheon.

“You think that’s bad? There was a time we dared him to shot gun a four loko and he did it.”

“Oh. Yeah. He hallucinated that night,” Shownu comments, oddly casual as he speaks the words. 

Hyungwon’s face is the funniest thing about the situation because picturing Wonho drinking like that now makes Kihyun want to be sick. 

“We made him throw up and then drink two bottles of water just so he wouldn’t die.”

“High school Wonho was wild.”

“How did you survive that?” Kihyun shoots him a look. One whiff of a Loko was all it took to get Kihyun tipsy so he couldn’t imagine surviving two in quick succession. 

“Okay, I can feel your judgement from here, cutie. I don’t need that.”

“Let’s talk about the real danger to society. Drunk Lee Jooheon,” Changkyun throws out. Wonho is grateful for the change in conversation. Minhyuk seems to be too, if the way he leans forward to take part in the discussion is any indication.

“Jooheon would be fun drunk,” Minhyuk comments.

“He is. Until he starts to stunt.”

“Stunt?” Hyungwon questions Changkyun and Shownu. 

“He jumped off of the deck onto the roof of a shed then onto the ground.”

Kihyun really just needs to listen to Shownu calmly explain his friends’ dumbassery. Preferably in Podcasts. 

“Aww, come on guys. That was one time,” Jooheon whines.

“Worst thing was when he got up and said that falling that distance made his back feel  _ better _ .”

“So, how many more shots do I need to pour in you before you slide off the roof in the back of the Brigade with me?”

“Minhyuk  _ no _ !” Kihyun scolds. 

“Seven,” Changkyun answers, eyes appraising the state of Jooheon and brain recollecting how many shots he had already ingested. With flushed cheeks and hazy eyes, Jooheon probably didn’t need the full seven. None of it mattered, though, because they weren’t going to get twisted that night. 

  
  


. . .    
  


The bar is dark and Kihyun definitely shouldn’t have taken part in the final pre-game shot. His emotions are all over the place and his tongue is looser than ever.

"Calm down, Cutie," Wonho says softly in his ear, wrapping his arms around Kihyun's waist and then resting his head on the smaller's shoulder. 

Kihyun can't let go of his anger that fast so he instead stays quiet, huffing and leaning into Wonho. 

He watches as Shownu and the bouncer remove a man from the club.

"You're hot when you're mad."

Wonho's breath is hot in his ear, voice low. Kihyun turns his glare on Wonho, but the older only chuckles. Leave his boyfriend to be flirty when there was nothing Kihyun wanted more than to crack the half-empty bottle of beer on the bar next to him over the drunken man’s head.

“Go fuck yourself,” he seethes. 

“I'd rather fuck you.” 

What the H-E-double-L hell?

Kihyun's anger simmers as he scoffs and shakes his head. He can’t believe it. Or can he? No, he can’t. “Oh God, do you even care that I'm angry?”

“Of course I do. But what's the use in getting so worked up? We can't do anything about it besides get him kicked out.”

There are plenty of things he could do, he thought to himself. He could end that man’s whole bloodline with a kick to the crotch if he wanted to, for a start.

“I’m so fucking mad.”

“I can tell.”

“How the hell are you so calm?”

Wonho shrugs. He waits a minute for Kihyun to really let go of his anger. “You keep cursing at me and I don’t like it.”

“Sorry,” he calms down a bit and feels some regret. “I’m just very,  _ very  _ impassioned about the issue.”

“What exactly happened?” 

“Nothing more than what you saw,” he brushes off the situation not wanting to get upset again. It's not really his place. “I just can’t stand to see women get mistreated by men.”

Wonho hums, “I like that about you.”

It’s one of the things that Kihyun likes about Wonho, too. If he hadn’t approached at the last second, he probably would’ve intervened before Kihyun did. His mother raised him right.

Shownu returns after a minute, bouncer nowhere to be found.

“It’s a good thing you were here,” Kihyun tells him. 

“I’m glad Wonho held you back.”

Kihyun doesn’t like the teasing, but Wonho just smiles like he’d played his cards right. He probably had. Kihyun thinks that Wonho knows him really well at this point.

. . .

Kihyun feels like he's had novocaine injected into him. His skin feels raw. 

God, since when did he drink this much? Oh, right. Since Minhyuk wanted him to and Wonho promised to take care of him. He stares at himself in the mirror, cheeks flushed, eyes struggling to focus. 

What a mess. 

And poor Wonho has to look after him. 

Wait-- where is he? Where's Wonho?

Fleeing the bathroom, Kihyun starts a search of the bar for his boyfriend. 

When he spots him across the bar, where he left him at the table with their friends, he wants to cry. 

Getting this wasted is absolutely not fair to his perfect boyfriend. 

Wonho smiles at something someone says and Kihyun makes his way over, trying not to cry. Tears start to prickle at his eyes and he swallows as much air as he can. 

_ Breathe _ he reminds himself. 

“Hi Cutie,” Wonho smiles as Kihyun sits. “Wait, are you okay?”

Kihyun nods and slumps into the chair, head feeling heavy and dropping onto Wonho's shoulder. 

It's loud in the bar and dark. His eyes fixate on the sleek tabletop.

“Earth to Kihyun,” Minhyuk calls.

Kihyun looks up at him, blinks slowly to acclimate his eyes to the low light and movement of his friend's waving hand. 

How much time has passed?

“We're gonna get food. Are you hungry or do you just want to go home?”

He glances at Wonho who then speaks up, “we'll just go home.”

Kihyun nods slowly at Minhyuk. 

Everyone then stands and gathers their belongings, cards and receipts stuffed into pockets, jackets slung on. 

Minhyuk grabs Kihyun's face. His voice is so low-- the club equivalent of a whisper. 

“Are you okay?” Kihyun nods, cheeks squished by his best friend's hands. “Text me when you get home. Drink lots of water and try not to freak out, mmkay?”

“Minhyuk is this okay?”

His eyes widen somewhat but Kihyun doesn't notice because his vision blurs. 

“Everything is fine, Ki. Wonho! Take good care of my baby. Make him eat some candy before he goes to bed.”

“Candy?” Wonho questions, pulling Kihyun close to his side. 

Hyungwon stands behind Minhyuk, eyes watching Jooheon, Changkyun, and Shownu migrate to the door. 

“It cures hangovers.”

“Okay,” Wonho agrees.

Goodbyes are exchanged on the sidewalk outside of the bar. Shownu salutes Wonho before supervising his intoxicated charges. Wonho returns the gesture and then drapes his arm across Kihyun’s shoulders. 

“Wonho,” Kihyun mumbles as he stumbles down the street.

“Yes baby?” 

Kihyun wrenches himself free from Wonho, struggling to get his boyfriend's heavy, muscular arm off of him, but then holds his hand. 

Wonho chuckles at the action but lets him do it and hums lowly as they walk home.

Wonho chuckles as his boyfriend babbles on and on about something but his laughter is cut short when Ki starts sniffling. 

“I don’ wanna drink anymore,” he whines, eyes tracing the neon lights of another bar. 

“You don't have to, cutie. We're going home now.”

“Home?”

“Uh huh,” Wonho nods. “Then we'll get you all settled and go to bed.”

Kihyun gets quiet and when Wonho glances over, he notices tear tracks on his face and that the sniffles he'd been hearing hadn't been stopping like he thought. 

“Baby, what's wrong?”

“I'm sorry. . .” he cries and mumbles things that Wonho can't understand. “I'm drunk. . . You're taking care of me. . . Not supposed to be this way.”

“It's okay, Ki,” Wonho calms him down. “You’re allowed to drink. I'll take care of you. I don't mind.”

“Are you sure?” he cries.

“We're a team. You take care of me and I take care of you. Now please stop crying.”

“Okay.” 

By the time they get back to Kihyun's apartment, he's calmed down. 

“Can you text Minhyukie?” Kihyun asks as he leans heavy on the wall as Wonho unties his shoes for him.

“Uh huh.”

“Tell him I'm home and that I freaked out only a little bit.”

“Sure, baby. Where's your phone?” He pulls it from his back pocket with more effort than necessary and hands it to Wonho with a frown pulling at his lips.

Wonho sends the text and sits Kihyun at his kitchen table. He gives him a large glass of water and asks him if he's hungry. 

Kihyun shakes his head and says “no,” but then eats Wonho's instant ramen so he has to make a second one. 

Wonho gets them both ready for bed as Kihyun sobers up but gets hit by a wave of tiredness.

They crawl into bed together.

“Don't let me do this again,” he instructs his older boyfriend.

Wonho just laughs and slings an arm around Kihyun.

“You’re cute when you’re drunk.”

He wrinkles his nose, “how?”

Wonho shrugs, the movement reverberates through the smaller. 

“You just are. Like a cute, sleepy little baby.”

“I cried,” he points out, wanting to shrivel up and die. 

“Don’t hate me but it was kind of funny. I’ve never seen a grown man cry while drunk.”

“It’s called anxiety,” he whispers. 

Wonho just smooths Kihyun’s hair down, “I guess you’re right. But I didn’t mind.”

Kihyun kisses Wonho’s jaw good night.

.

.

.

“You go off to America once and suddenly you come back bold,” Jooheon comments as he enters the apartment.

Wonho turns to look at him and his cheeks flame instantly. 

“Okay, it’s not what it looks like.”

“Jooheon, you have got to see this video!” Kihyun shouts before his cackling is renewed from the kitchen.

“Oh for heaven’s sake.” Wonho rolls his eyes but Jooheon ignores him and makes his way into the kitchen to see the video. 

“What happened in here?”

“Just look,” he hears Kihyun instruct. 

With both of them distracted, he continues on his way to put some fresh, dry, clean clothes on. 

When he walks back into the kitchen, he finds Jooheon and Kihyun still cachinnating. The kitchen has mostly been cleaned up from his mishap.

“Why would you try to do a walking handstand in our kitchen? And while Kihyun was about to scrub the pan too.” 

The answer, he knows, is going to go over like a ton of bricks. (Or: like he did from his handstand.) Maybe not immediately with Jooheon, but definitely when Changkyun finds out. 

He mumbles, “I wanted to impress him.”

“Whipped. I can’t believe you were gonna take a video of it,” Jooheon cackles.

“You say that as if you didn’t get Kihyun to teach you how to make dinner for Minju--”

“Oh, she really liked that by the way. Thanks, Ki.”

“No problem.”

Kihyun makes the roasting up to him later with lots of kisses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took forever :( the last chapter will be chapter 30 and then I'll post the extra stuff that never made it out of the first draft. Also, when I started posting this like a year ago, I thought it was almost done and now here we are with my struggling to write the last chapter. [It's 'cause I miss Wonho :( ]


	30. Chapter 30

There are a lot of times, Kihyun thinks, that he’s absolutely worthless. 

Some of those times involve alcohol. His brain blows things way out of proportion and the alcohol doesn’t help, so he’s left chugging down water and trying to keep his mental health boat afloat. 

Most of those times involve any kind of rejection he faces. Being passed up for a solo, getting berated by a customer when he did make a mistake, receiving a grade he thought should be higher...

It’s not easy. 

He’s the captain and the world is the sea. It’s unruly with no one to tell him where to go or what to do. He never knows what he’ll encounter next, be it a calm day at sea or a wild night of storms. 

Luckily, Wonho is behind him, always. He’s a fantastic first mate or co-captain, though he can never really take control over Kihyun’s ship. Not only is it physically impossible, but Kihyun won’t let him as a built-in self-defense mechanism. 

So at times when Kihyun is lost at sea, no matter if he’s taken alcohol or a different kind of disappointment on board, Wonho is there to guide him where he needs to go. 

And when his anxiety is making him question Wonho... well, all he can do is wait it out and face the facts. 

Wonho is sweet, patient, and kind. No matter how Kihyun feels, what he says, or what he does, Wonho is there for him. Sometimes his words aren’t perfect and sometimes his touch isn’t just what Kihyun needs, but Wonho is always there. His efforts are always working in tandem with his brain to straighten things out, steady to the course. 

He’ll weather any storm for Wonho. Wonho will weather any storm for him.

He’ll sail days on end for him. Wonho had sailed days on end for him already. 

He’ll even turn the motors on himself and initiate kisses and make out times. 

Wonho is worth it. He’s the pirates’ gold, the treasure of the sea. And Kihyun doesn’t have to go that far to find out. He just has to open his eyes and look, to think about it. Wonho has been there all along. 

His friends, too, but Wonho, with his support and kisses and kindness, is different than Yoongi and Minhyuk. It goes deeper and in a different direction, his care. 

Sometimes when he’s falling apart, Wonho’s hug is all he needs to put himself back together, or to let his boyfriend do it for him. And sometimes when his brain is whispering  _ run, run before you get hurt _ , Wonho is there; and though he doesn’t say anything, there’s a voice in his head saying _ he’s here. Wonho is here, for you. _

It’s enough for Kihyun.

. . .

“Ki! Let's go on a double date.”

Kihyun glances up from the table where he’s working on his homework for an elective. “Why?” 

“ _ Why? _ ” Kihyun knows he fucked up by the tone of Minhyuk's voice. And if he hadn’t, then his facial expression most definitely gives him away. The shadows on his face are downright creepy. “Why, you ask? Maybe because you're my bestest friend in the whole world and because you love me and because I have four tickets to the theme park.”

“Theme park?” Kihyun parrots. 

“Yes. I won them from the school's campus programming office.” Minhyuk digs four tickets out of the back pocket of his skinny jeans and holds them up, fanned out like he’s showing off a stack of cash in a music video.

He hadn’t even realized the school’s CPO was doing a giveaway. He wonders what Minhyuk had to do to win them. Probably show up and participate in some dumb game, maybe answer a survey-- who knows. 

His thoughts turn to rollercoasters and his stomach knots. Kihyun’s eyes find their spot on his notebook page.

“Why don’t you take Mark and Jackson? I'm sure they'll be more fun.”

“Because I want to take you, my precious little Kiwi.”

Kihyun sighs and gives in now before he wastes another hour (or more) of his life. 

“Fine, but you are  _ not  _ allowed to call me Kiwi ever again.”

“Why not? It's cute, like you.” Minhyuk pouts.

“Because I'm not a fruit.”

“You’re my fruity little-- oh.” Kihyun doesn’t have to say anything, he knows he’s right. “Yeah, okay, I can see why you don’t want me to call you that.”

. . .

Wonho excuses himself to the restroom. 

“If you’re not back in like, two or three minutes, I’m calling security.”

Kihyun is left at the mercy of his friends.   
"You're starting to talk like him," Minhyuk smiles knowingly. He thinks back to his threat, but nothing clicks.   
"Except you don't do that stupid thing where you skip the middle number," Hyungwon adds unhelpfully.    
Kihyun thinks it's cute when Wonho skips a number and he hadn’t even realized that he’d started employing the phrase in his own speech pattern.

Coming to the amusement park wasn’t ideal, but at least Wonho was with him. He was afraid of heights and Kihyun didn’t like many of the rides, so they could skip things together. It was the most fun he’d had in ages. 

The last time he went to an amusement park was years ago when his brother still liked him and his parents fueled his dreams instead of applying practiced cynicism. While that was a fond memory, this one was too-- in it’s own right. 

His boyfriend, his best friend, and a co-worker turned friend were enough to make a terrible bus ride to spend free tickets worthwhile. 

.

.

.

“I love your dynamic. Like, Ki is so small but deadly. And Wonho is  _ big _ but harmless.”

"Thank you? I think?" Wonho glances Minhyuk, but behind the younger’s large sunglasses, it’s hard to tell what he’s thinking based on his expression.

"Take it as a compliment. Minhyuk couldn't hurt a fly."

Wonho just nods at Hyungwon and waits for Kihyun to come back. 

They’re talking about riding the pirate ship and that sling shot contraption that Wonho is 98% sure results in death. 

He doesn’t know where his fear of heights stems from, but then again, most people don’t know where their phobias come from either. And it’s not irrational, even if the way he cries for his mother kind of is. He can’t help it and he knows Kihyun won’t judge him for it. 

Maybe if he’s lucky someone will wait with him instead of going on the ride. Or he could wait in line and then bail at the last minute because there was no way he was going to let the machines break him and ruin his day. 

. . .

Adulthood was supposed to be fun. And maybe it was, if Wonho didn’t focus on having to work to keep his mom, boyfriend, and friends happy. He had all of them in his life and they didn’t ask for much besides time and attention.

Nights on video chat with his mom made him happy. Nights spent being nagged by his boyfriend about caffeine-intake and instant ramen made him happy. Yeah, he was happy. 

It’s hard to believe that Yoo Kihyun, the guy who had once paid five whole dollars to be his boyfriend, was still his boyfriend. It seemed like a miracle that the younger hadn’t been bested by his anxieties and that he was still cuddled up to Wonho’s side as a movie played on Changkyun’s TV in the living room. 

“Are you watching this?” He asks Kihyun. The movie is a lot of blood and guts with explosions every few minutes. It’s not really what he’s in the mood for, feeling more introspective tonight, and Kihyun doesn’t seem terribly interested in it either if the way he draws patterns on Wonho’s thigh is any indication. 

“Not really.”

With that, Wonho pauses the screen and turns on the lamp. He excuses himself to his room for a minute before settling back into his seat on the couch. 

“It’s cheesy as hell,” Wonho admits while Kihyun looks at him. “But I want you to have it. Just so you know.”

When Kihyun opens the velvet box with the promise ring inside, he cries. Wonho worries but then realizes Kihyun is happy as he slides it on. 

“I can’t believe you’re so wonderful,” he admits, wiping tears away and Wonho knows it’s because he hates crying. “Are you really real?”

“Yeah. I am. And I’ll always have your back.” He pulls Kihyun towards him into a hug that borders on bone-crushing, but is exactly the kind of reassurance he needs. 

. . .

~ A little Changkyun special before the chapter of extras ~

“They’re being domestic in the living room again.”

“Let them have their moment, Daniel.”

“But I’m hungry,” he whines into the receiver. 

Kihyun sighs and pulls away from Wonho. 

“Guess I should make him something. You want a snack?”

“I have you!”

Kihyun shoots him a look.

“Yes, I would like a snack. Thanks.”

“Come on out, Changkyun.”

Internally, Changkyun thinks  _ aw yiss.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Me to me: break them up)  
> Everything I write ends in a dumpster fire because I can't write satisfactory endings. Anyways, stay tuned for the chapter of extras I wrote that are pure stupidity and not exactly canon!


	31. Extras

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some extras that didn't make it into the new version of the story for your enjoyment

Wonho venmos Minhyuk from Kihyun's account and puts "no more nip slips 🤢 go buy some pasties" as the detail for the payment.

  
  


Kihyun is surprised to see a text from Kiwoo come in and doesn’t waste any time opening it to read what he says. The last three times Kiwoo had texted him had all been related to some kind of family emergency, so his breath caught in his throat.

**Kiwoo**

why the hell are you buyin pasties for Minhyuk

**Kihyun**

What?

I have no idea what you’re talking about. Besides, you and I both know he has no shame and would never wear pasties.

**Kiwoo**

Ur venmo

Kihyun goes to see what he’s talking about and finds himself laughing, despite the fact that it’s not something he’d usually laugh at. 

**Kihyun**

It was Wonho lol

He types out and sends back.

**Extra 2**

"Is it just Kihyun or is it hot in here?" Hyungwon calls out with a grin as he walks into the bar, flanked by Wonho and Minhyuk. Several people turn to look and see what the commotion is and a group of young women laugh at them and applaud and they smile and wave. 

. . .

“Wonho! You have to keep your clothes on! Please stop stripping,” Kihyun pleads and smacks Wonho’s hands away from his zipper. 

Wonho just giggles and gets distracted by something. Kihyun looks around for another one of his friends that could help him get Wonho under control or home, either one would do. 

He finds Hyungwon first, but honestly, the dude won't be able to do anything to help. First of all, he's tiny despite being tall. Second, he has no experience in reigning in Wonho like Shownu, Jooheon, and Changkyun.

For the meantime, he just tries to keep Wonho fully clothed.

  
  


.

.

.

  
  
  
  
  
  


#  Extra - Tattoo (which was canon until I re-wrote the first half or so of this)

“This is my apprentice, Jeongguk,” Yoongi gestures to the handsome young man next to him.

“I'm not technically an apprentice anymore.”

“Shut up, I made you.”

Jeongguk shuts up.

“And this,” he turns back to Kihyun and gestures to the two, “is my childhood friend and his boyfriend.”

“Nice to meet you guys.”

“So, what are you getting done today?”

Kihyun sits in the chair in the corner and lets Wonho explain.

“I want a Sartre quote on my thigh. Right about here,” he gestures to his leg as he speaks. “Just black and white. Kind of small.”

Yoongi gets out some paper to draw a sketch, knowing it won’t take long. He’d briefly discussed with Wonho beforehand about what he would be doing. 

“It should read ‘Life is C between B and D’.”

“What does that mean?” Jeongguk asks. 

“What do you think of this font and this size?” Yoongi asks. Wonho nods in affirmation. 

“It looks great. And to answer your question, a Western Philosopher said it. ‘Life is the choice between birth and death’. I just think it’s a really cool thing to live by.”

Jeongguk nods as Yoongi draws out the letters. 

Kihyun says nothing, just sits and observes. His tongue runs along the back of his teeth and he does his best to keep his hands still in his lap. 

Wonho sends him a smile and he forces a small one in return. He’s nervous.

“Are you breathing, Ki?” Yoongi asks without looking up. 

“No.”

“Figures. Jeongguk, go get him some water.”

“Yes master, right away,” Jeongguk bows overdramatically, trying to see if he can distract Kihyun somewhat. 

“I think he’s more nervous than I am,” Wonho comments, mirth dancing in his eyes. 

“Probably. Ki’s always been anxious about needles,” Yoongi comments off-handedly. 

Wonho just looks at Kihyun, eyes wide.

_ So that’s why he didn’t want to come _ . 

“What do you think?” The words wrench him from his thoughts before he can excuse Kihyun.

Wonho inspects the design carefully since it’ll be on him forever. 

“Can we change this letter a bit? Like make it less rounded?”

Yoongi adjusts the design. 

Jeongguk returns with a bottle of water and a packet of pretzels for Kihyun who just accepts them with a small thank you.

Yoongi shows the design to Wonho.

“It’s perfect,” Wonho beams. 

“So, I’m gonna need you to strip off your pants and then I’ll shave you and get started.”

Wonho stands up and removes his pants, thighs on display in his short shorts. Kihyun averts his eyes, neck starting to tint red. “I came ready.” He hands his pants to Kihyun who folds them and places them in his lap neatly. 

He sips on the water.

“Hey, if you shave him I can transfer the design,” Yoongi says to Jeongguk. 

“Are you cool with another man shaving your boyfriend?” He tries to joke with Kihyun, but he just nods, face still looking pale. 

“Ki, breathe,” Yoongi reminds him gently without looking up. 

Wonho feels terrible as Jeongguk starts to shave his thigh. 

“Kihyun? You don’t have to stay. I won’t be upset.”

Kihyun shakes his head and looks at Wonho-- wills himself to focus on his boyfriend. He wants to be here and be supportive.

He just. . . really hates needles. And the buzzing sound that the tattoo gun makes. And the way this room smells like lemon antiseptic, even though he recognizes that it’s because it’s clean which is absolutely imperative. 

He shakes his head, “I’m sorry. I really wanted to watch but I don’t think I can.”

“It’s okay--”

“I really think I might pass out and you haven’t even started yet.”

“There’s a nice cafe just down the street--”

“The one you work at. Go get a coffee and then wait in the bookstore.”

He nods twice and stands up, pecks Wonho on the top of his head, mumbles a ‘goodbye’ to the three, and then scurries out of the room. 

. . .

“Cutie?”

“Hmm?” 

“Why didn’t you tell me you were afraid of needles?”

“I didn’t want you to think I was a loser.”

“I would never think that.”

“And I wanted to be with you when you got your tattoo, but I couldn’t even do that.”

“It’s okay. I’m not upset. I just wish you had told me. You looked so anxious and it made me feel like a bad boyfriend.”

“You're not a bad boyfriend. If anyone's a bad boyfriend, it's me.”

“No way. You're the best boyfriend I could have asked for.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who stuck with me on this-- especially to those of you who left comments, kudos, and/or interact with me on Twitter. It's been fun and I hope you'll look forward to the next story I put out!
> 
> Shout out to Vicky and Eira!!

**Author's Note:**

> This story may be a little slow to start, but stick with me please.
> 
> Let me know what you think in the comments or on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/ninaaavan)


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